Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

PeppermintSweet Posted: Sep 28, 2012 05:56 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

Hello! I plan to get marry next year in March. My fiancé best-friend is the best man and he is also the person planning the bachelorette party. When we got engaged, the best man was excited to plan the bachelor party in Vegas. I love my fiancé and I trust him. He's never given me a reason to not trust him or think otherwise. So Vega was the destination but nothing was set in stones. .. I just found out last night from my fiancé that the best man booked the flights to Vegas for the bachelor party!!!! My fiancé and I haven’t even spoken about what we really want to do for our party or come to an agreement on what’s best. I understand that the bachelor party its a surprise and I am not suppose to know what his groomsman have plan - I understand that very well. But to pick the date, the hr and location with out giving us the heads up?? This is my/our wedding and I am so hurt how everyone is choosing to do what ever makes them happy. To avoid problems, the least the best man could have done was to ask first. Do you think am over reacting?? Is it worth letting him know how I feel? Thank you in advance for your help.

AliB84 Posted: Sep 28, 2012 06:48 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

I don't think its a big deal at all. I was completely left out of the loop for my husband's bachelor party by the groomsmen planning it and he was completely left out of the loop for my bachelorette party by my bridesmaids planning it. I am assuming that since you are getting married in March 2013 that you have enough time between now and then to plan out things accordingly. I was so busy getting things ready for the wedding that as it got closer, I welcomed a weekend without my man! HAHAH!

KDNY133 Posted: Sep 28, 2012 09:05 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

Thats a hell of a best man if you ask me. Depends on what your problem is..if its just time/date i dont think his intention was to piss you guys off, it is a surprise...if its the whole vegas thing then i kinda get why your upset. If your FH is upset then he needs to address it. This is a great time in your life and everything should flow. Speak up now or forever hold your peace..lol

cconaty94 Posted: Sep 28, 2012 10:18 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

I don't think you are over reacting at all. I may be kind of old fashioned, but it seems like you are being very patient and understanding as it is. However, the other brides are right, I don't think the BM did his planning with any negative intentions toward you, he probably just wanted to surprise your fiance (or someone told him what he is supposed to do and he followed suit). I would just be honest with your fiance about your feelings and make it known that that surprise element isn't going to fly anymore lol

kaw2be Posted: Sep 28, 2012 10:32 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

I understand your point, BM definitely should have cleared it with your FI before he booked flights, hotels, etc. Does FI have a problem with the dates at all? If yes, than it's your FI responsibility to talk to the BM about it, not yours.

Kristin31613 Posted: Sep 28, 2012 10:42 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

Yes, and there really it's nothing you can do without looking like a psycho bride. You 'll win more points letting this go and working on your own!

LisaReyes Posted: Sep 28, 2012 11:33 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

I'd be annoyed too - but it sounds like the best man had good intentions. Definitely let FH know that you're not a big fan that he signed him up to go to vegas without clearing the dates first. But other than that there is really nothing you can do. Let FH handle this one and appreciate the effort his best man put into throwing him an awesome bachelor party! He only gets one!

scottsbride Posted: Sep 29, 2012 08:51 AM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

I think all you can do is talk to FH about it. If he is ok with it then let it slide.

Diorprincess Posted: Sep 29, 2012 09:39 AM

Re: Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

I don't think it's a big deal. I told my fh he can do whatever he wants just obviously not to do it my bday or something. at first his friend tried to plan a bach party nye 2013-14 which wouldn't be cool with me and I would have been mad. being alone nye cause they are off partying? no thanks lol. fh right away said no nye stuff though along with all the other taken guys. his single friend is doing the planning so he wasn't thinking.

so yeah I'd just let it go because guys don't think like we do lol. he probably saw a good deal for vegas and just went for it figuring well he won't be busy. I wouldn't even say anything either. just take it as it's a guy thing. I mean girls we need to know little details before booking anything lol guys are more like sure lets go!

vppjzv Posted: Sep 29, 2012 10:33 AM

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Karin Posted: Sep 29, 2012 12:20 PM

Best Man booked Bachelor without consulting with me!!! Advise pls

I agree that your FH should handle this by himself however he sees fit. If he is unhappy with the plan, he should address it. If it falls on a day that something important has already been planned, then he needs to straighten it out. If it were me, I would stay completely out of it. Otherwise, you will come across as controlling and I bet your FH would not want that to come across to his friends. Just my opinion!!