Black Tie???

I think it depends on the 'feel' of the hall you are having the reception at If you are having the reception at a mansion or a catering hall that does not look like a 'catering hall' then I would say its a black tie event. Also evening vs daytime

i guess part of it is the RH
i personally just have a hard time requiring guests to wear certain attire to attend

JMO
many guests are spending a lot of $$ just to come and that is just another expense for guests

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Posted by Snowflake08

i guess part of it is the RH
i personally just have a hard time requiring guests to wear certain attire to attend

JMO
many guests are spending a lot of $$ just to come and that is just another expense for guests

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That's a great point.

I'm curious...does saying 'Black Tie Formal' mean that you have to actually show up in black tie formal? or does it give you an idea that it's a formal affair?

FH and i went to a wedding in June that said 'Black Tie Formal' on the invite, and i honestly didn't see anyone wearing a black tie.

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Posted by Annoulak

I'm curious...does saying 'Black Tie Formal' mean that you have to actually show up in black tie formal? or does it give you an idea that it's a formal affair?

FH and i went to a wedding in June that said 'Black Tie Formal' on the invite, and i honestly didn't see anyone wearing a black tie.

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if an invitation says black tie, it is understood to mean tuxedos and gowns as opposed to suits and dresses

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Posted by Tori9299

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Posted by Snowflake08

i guess part of it is the RH
i personally just have a hard time requiring guests to wear certain attire to attend

JMO
many guests are spending a lot of $$ just to come and that is just another expense for guests

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That's a great point.

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thanks
i just like to think of things from the guests' points of view

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Posted by Tori9299

When can you consider your wedding a 'Black Tie' affair?

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when you put this on your invite it means that the guys must wear a tuxedo or something of equal standard style. Women also go a little more formal in their attire as well, meaning more ballgown style, as opposed to cocktail dresses.

it really also depends on your bm dresses, and what the GMs are wearing. and the decor of the hall. if they are in normal bp attire, sometimes it gets a little much for the guests to incure that cost of dressing up AND spending a lot of money for a gift, travel, etc.

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Posted by bluegreen08

We're calling ours black tie optional so people know it's formal, but nobody has to get a tux (although those who have them can wear them if they want)

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That's a good point--my cousin had a 'black tie optional' wedding to keep costs down for guests. I think it's a good idea because then most women come in gowns and men come in either tuxes or suits.

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Posted by bluegreen08

We're calling ours black tie optional so people know it's formal, but nobody has to get a tux (although those who have them can wear them if they want)

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We did the same. I have been to weddings where people are dressed very casually and I did not want this kind of attire at my wedding (JMO).

For a black tie affair, it would be an evening wedding, formal setting, tuxes for men, gowns for women. Bridal party very formal.

Black tie optional is just slightly less formal than just black tie - meaning guys should wear tuxes if they have them, but can wear suits if they don't have them. With black tie, the guys that don't own a tux would have to rent one.

My own personal opinion is that if you know that the majority of your guests do not attend very formal affairs regularly and therefore may not have the appropriate black tie clothing in their closets, then if you have a black tie affair your guests will be spending more $ just to GO to your wedding. We personally did not want to do that (no one in our families owns a tux or very formal gowns), so even though some people went out and bought suits or dressy dresses for our wedding because they wanted to, we didn't feel like anyone felt they HAD to go and buy something they might never wear again just to be a guest at our wedding.

ETA: we didn't put black tie optional or anything on our invites and the majority of our guests came appropriately dressed.

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Posted by MrsQ-in2007

For a black tie affair, it would be an evening wedding, formal setting, tuxes for men, gowns for women. Bridal party very formal.

Black tie optional is just slightly less formal than just black tie - meaning guys should wear tuxes if they have them, but can wear suits if they don't have them. With black tie, the guys that don't own a tux would have to rent one.

My own personal opinion is that if you know that the majority of your guests do not attend very formal affairs regularly and therefore may not have the appropriate black tie clothing in their closets, then if you have a black tie affair your guests will be spending more $ just to GO to your wedding. We personally did not want to do that (no one in our families owns a tux or very formal gowns), so even though some people went out and bought suits or dressy dresses for our wedding because they wanted to, we didn't feel like anyone felt they HAD to go and buy something they might never wear again just to be a guest at our wedding.

ETA: we didn't put black tie optional or anything on our invites and the majority of our guests came appropriately dressed.

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I totally agree -- think of your guests and whether they have tuxes or will need to rent. FH and I are young, and none of our friends have tuxes. Some of my parents friends do. We will be having a lot of OOT guests and we're hoping they can make the trip -- we don't want to add any more expenses than necessary. We're including 'Black Tie Optional' because a) we will have a bunch of people from out of state and want to make sure they dress appropriately, and b) it's not Saturday night but we want people to realize it's still a formal event.

We're expecting/hoping for dark suits and nice dresses (rather than khakis, sundresses, whatever people might wear to an afternoon summer wedding).

hope our guests will dress nicely....

I liked the idea of black tie and then one of my BM made a good point. She said that she feels that the bridal party should stand out, and once you make it black tie everyone is in tuxes and gowns and it makes your bridal party look like everyone else.

Plus I agree it's totally an extra expense the most guests will not want to pay.

We put 'Formal Attire' on our invitations, for a Saturday evening wedding. Ceremony was at 8, Cocktail hour didn't start until 8:30.

It has a similar connotation to 'Black Tie Optional' but in my opinion it is more clear. To me 'BTO' doesn't really indicate if you would prefer they wear tuxes or what exactly you would prefer.

We did not want anyone to feel obligated to rent a tux.

Those who already owned a tux wore it. Those who didn't either rented a tux b/c they were family and they wanted to, or they wore a dark suit. Everyone was appropriately dressed.

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Posted by Snowflake08


JMO
many guests are spending a lot of $$ just to come and that is just another expense for guests

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i agree. we have one at the end of the month and its costly. thank goodness my aunt lives near by. we're staying with her after the wedding

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Posted by zoe282

I liked the idea of black tie and then one of my BM made a good point. She said that she feels that the bridal party should stand out, and once you make it black tie everyone is in tuxes and gowns and it makes your bridal party look like everyone else.

Plus I agree it's totally an extra expense the most guests will not want to pay.

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That is also a great point.