Went dress looking with one of my BM's last night. We saw two dresses which I adore. Problem is they were both strapless and I know the other girls are going to have a major problem with this. My BM that went with me last night loved the dresses, being that she is a size 6, and said it's my wedding and the other girls should be willing to wear any dress I choose. She has a good point, but my girls range from a size 6 to a size 26. I seriously dont know what to do. Every dress that they seem to pick is plain, and doesnt compliment my dress. When I suggest a dress there is always some complaint - we dont want a strapless, no shawls, no spagetti straps, nothing revealing, the list goes on. I just dont know what to do!!!
FrescaBride
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Re: BM dress drama
I am only in the beginning stage but I can probably understand what you are going through. My BM mostly range from size 6 to 10 but I have to take in consideration their bust lines. I always thought that I'd find them a dress that compliments their figure and I was thinking with straps but a little ticker or bigger than spaghetti straps and squared in the front. I want them to be comfortable as well.
MOHmissy
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Re: BM dress drama
I dont know if you'll like this idea, but maybe you could have them all wear different dresses in the same color and fabric. They could each wear a dress to compliment their own figure.
I think you should want to compliment their figures but you need to be happy with their choice as well. that is why this is so hard to do. I think it really is just like a big guessing game and try-on-athon untill you find that perfect fit for them and more importantly for you.
heidla
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Re: BM dress drama
My girls are all different shapes and sizes. I decided that if I am going to ask someone to spend their money on the 'honor' of being in my wedding that I need to be flexible. Now, I am being extremely flexible. I am letting them pick their own dresses. The only requirements that I have is that they be at least tea length and black. What if you allow everyone to be in the same color and fabric but in styles that compliment their body type. That might make it alot easier on all parties involved. Good Luck!!!
Marisa&Brian
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Re: BM dress drama
Don't get upset - Your friends also have to understand it is IMPOSSIBLE to fine ONE dress that will look perfect on everyone - They should also, however, understand that no matter what the dress looks like - they are paying for it to be altered to their own bodies - I have a pretty large chest and was uncomfortable w/ the strapless my cousin's wife picked for us (BMs) - I kept quiet b/c she really loved it - but once it was fitted to ME - it was amazing - I NEVER thought i'd look like that in a strapless gown - You have to be flexible to a point - BUT THEY HAVE TO WORK w/ YOU TOO !!!
Pookiesangel
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Re: BM dress drama
Posted by MOHmissy
I dont know if you'll like this idea, but maybe you could have them all wear different dresses in the same color and fabric. They could each wear a dress to compliment their own figure.
Just a suggestion, good luck!!
That's what we are planning to do, I have three girls, two plus size and one size 6, so I'm letting them pick something complimentry to each other, in the same color, that they will feel comfortable wearing
divabride
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Re: BM dress drama
marisa&brian....you hit it right on the head. I want them to try the dresses on, but they want to see pics of the dress first - and automatically shut me down because this or that is 'wrong' with the dress. They are quick to shoot down a dress without even trying it on. I know these days alot of people are going with different styles of dresses for each girl, but I really want the same dress on every girl being the the matron and maid will be wearing the same dress but darker color.
JCbride2B
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Re: BM dress drama
I have been going through the same thing all week. I have two girls with petitre figures who can wear anything and look great and then I have another two who wear larger sizes and I couldn't find anything I like that complimented all of them. The ones I loved simply didnt flatter the more full figured girls. I was near tears. My advice is to go with the most cooperative, patient and helpful of your BM's and leave your options open. I went with my sisters and my FSIL (one sister is tiny and my FSIL is full figured). We went to four different stores and tried on a zillion dresses and when I was at my wits end because my smaller sister was disappointed we couldn't get the more fitted dress I loved which was putting a lot of stress on me. But my FSIL who was being so patient and supportive (suprise!) found one that was pretty and complimented them all. Hang in there! You may have to go with what the other girls are suggesting and do different styles by the same designer and in the same color, but stick with what makes you comfortable.
JCbride2B
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Re: BM dress drama
if it helps, this style flattered both my tinier and fuller BMs bm dresses
Marisa&Brian
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Re: BM dress drama
But you can't go from a Pic alone - those models are 5'11' and 100 lbs ! Go w/ ONE or two of your girls - pick out a few you like and bring the rest back to pick from those - they have to see what the dress looks like on their own body
Misstene
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Re: BM dress drama
I picked three dresses, made my MOH try on all three, and I made a decision. It's just like you said, a picture does it NO justice. One of my BMs hated the dress in the picture, but loved it when she tried it on. You can't please everyone. The only thing I did to accommodate the girls was pick a dress they can likely wear again (so I went with Tea-Length dresses) and second, I picked a dress that has a sash so that I could get the sash in black and they don't have to get their shoes dyed. Everyone can wear black shoes.
Other than that, you won't please everyone, just make a decision based on what you think would be best. My dress happens to come in plus sizes, I have two petite girls and two not-so-petite girls... So, it all worked out.
suven
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Re: BM dress drama
I think that a strapless dress may be difficult for the girls that are bigger. I chose a dress with straps for that reason. And, I am lucky because the dress looks good on all of the girls. They range from size 2 to size 20.
Smolokoff
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Re: BM dress drama
I think if the gown is cut right, it can be flattering in any size. I was in a friend's BP a few years ago. There were 5 of us. I was biggest at a size 24. The other girls were all different sizes right down to a size 4!! So we needed a universally flattering dress. It was a simple a-line, princess cut strapless dress. I can try to scan a couple of pics to show you. But I love to wear strapless things. Even my wedding dress is strapless. I may not have the greatest arms, but I am comfortable with them, and love to show off a little cleavage. Let them decide for themselves.
