One of my Bm's is giving my moh's a hard time, she isnt returning their phone calls and just seems disinterested in everything. They didnt want to tell me but they did b/c they are so frustrated! They dont want to chase her down to tell her what she needs to know, but they told me that there are things that they need to tell her... what should they or I do???? keep calling?? or just sit back and wait for her to call.. I think its sooo rude! It was a total project to get her to try on the dress, I mean when I asked her, she seemed really excited about being the wedding, but now.. she says she is excited but actions speak louder than words! ya know.
anjerandunder
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
give her some more time..she could be busy or maybe she's thinking of a way to tell you she can't do it..you picked her for a reason so don't give up on her yet..JMO
Taken2005
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
This has been going on for a month now, our families are extremely tight. I dont know what to do, but according to my MOHs she has not shown up for any meeting about the bachelorette party, or even called to say she wasnt coming.. just didnt show up! They are really pissed at her.
ANd I did ask her to be in it b/c we grew up together, its just these last few months she has changed alot!!! and not to be a ***** i think its all her losers boyfriends fault!
Sweetness
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
I'd give her some more time, speak to her yourself gently calmly and ask her if everything is ok. Sometimes not everyone is as excited for a wedding. I wouldn't kick her yet..JMHO Talk to her though and ask her why she missed the BM meeting.
RedHead
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
I would call her and find out what is going on. I would ***** her out until you hear what she has to say
Taken2005
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
well its pretty funny, b/c she called me in january saying she needed to borrow $400 from me. I told her that I dont have it, she told me why she needed it and I told her I couldnt help her. She lied to me about something else, and when she missed the bachelorette party meeting and my shower meeting, she called me to tell me that she was sorry she missed it the meetings, but i didnt know about the meetings, it was a secret, b/c my bms and my mom didnt want me catching on to things.. anyway, i have been dealing with all her issues for over a month and the fact that I was there for her everytime I called her really pisses me off that she doesnt return my phonecalls now... i am just really frustrated!
RedHead
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
well if that is the case...i am sure she is avoiding everyting because she doesn't have the money to contribute to the events... I would talk to her and ask about it!
Taken2005
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
her mother is paying for everything for the wedding, she needed the money for something else.
gina&ken
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
i voted for 'invite her to the shower and don't include her on anything' because it seems like everything will go much smoother this way, and you're still keeping her as a bridesmaid.
Taken2005
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
thanks so much for all your advice... I am just at the end of my rope...
alibali
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
i had the same problem with my sisters BM.. in the end i threw the shower all by myself and just invited the other BMs. it was annoying tho because one of the BM REALLY wanted to plan the bach party all by herself and stupidly i said sure. guess who was on the phone the ENTIRE week before trying to plan out something fun? yeah, that'd be me.
i'd say they should definitely just not include her in the planning of things and maybe she'll come around on her own but they shouldn't hold their breaths. it's hard, but its what they're going to have to do for now.
good luck!
Taken2005
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
well the thing is that I have 8 BMs and she is the only one who is not returning calls, and making herself unavailable...its not like they need her to do anything, but they are just pissed b/c she is making things difficult. so they went ahead and made all the plans without her, and when she has a problem with anything, then they will tell her what the deal is... I know my MOHs, they dont take sh!t from noone!!! lol...
Taken2005
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
thanks everyone!
mrsmeri1104
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Re: BM Problem! need advice!
Posted by Taken2005
One of my Bm's is giving my moh's a hard time, she isnt returning their phone calls and just seems disinterested in everything. They didnt want to tell me but they did b/c they are so frustrated! They dont want to chase her down to tell her what she needs to know, but they told me that there are things that they need to tell her... what should they or I do???? keep calling?? or just sit back and wait for her to call.. I think its sooo rude! It was a total project to get her to try on the dress, I mean when I asked her, she seemed really excited about being the wedding, but now.. she says she is excited but actions speak louder than words! ya know.
Sorry that you have to go through this all these events should be carefree and joyful for you leading up to your special day. I had a problem with a BM and I wound up kicking her out of my BP. It was the best thing I could do it took the stress off of everybody including myself. I did it very nicely.
PS: the only reason I asked her in the first place was she was married to my nephew and DH & I were in there wedding. Anyway they are divorced now.
