Bp

So my BP has started planning my shower. I am starting to hear that one of the girls is not happy with what they were asked to contribute and feels like she is being left out. I don’t know any details of my shower other than I think it is in Aug sometime. So of course I called and badgered one of my other girls and she told me that they were asked to contribute $200ea. I have never been in a BP before so I am not sure if that is a lot. What do you girls think?

*a little backround- all of my girls in my bridal party are between 23-26 the one who is not happy about everything is 45 (FH aunt)*

TIA

Everyone is different on this subject, but I think the BP asking to give $200 each towards a shower is alot. When you think about all ofthe expenses involved in being in your wedding it adds up quickly. Besides the shower there is the dress, shoes, possibly hair and make-up, plus gifts, that can be alot of $.


I told my MOH that I don't want to know anything about the shower, but the only thing I ask is that they not go overboard, I would be very happy if the shower were a potluck in someone's backyard, a living room, park or firehall.

Weddings get expenisve for everyone involved very quickly and I don't want anyone to feel financially burdened over the celebration of the love between FH and me. JMO

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Posted by Nina_m74

Everyone is different on this subject, but I think the BP asking to give $200 each towards a shower is alot. When you think about all ofthe expenses involved in being in your wedding it adds up quickly. Besides the shower there is the dress, shoes, possibly hair and make-up, plus gifts, that can be alot of $.


I told my MOH that I don't want to know anything about the shower, but the only thing I ask is that they not go overboard, I would be very happy if the shower were a potluck in someone's backyard, a living room, park or firehall.

Weddings get expenisve for everyone involved very quickly and I don't want anyone to feel financially burdened over the celebration of the love between FH and me. JMO

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I asked for the same thing that is exactly why I am shocked about everything. I don't want to know anything, but now FH's aunt asked FH to go to dinner because she is depressed about the whole situation. I feel so bad about everything. I would rather not have a shower than to know that someone is upset about everything.

I dont think that's too much money for a shower. My mom paid for my shower, it cost her $1500 total. But had she not paid for it and my BMs paid, there are 7 of them, so $1500 split 7 ways is $214.
So $200 sounds reasonable.

Is your BP paying for the whole entire shower?
I am in my friend's wedding in September and her parents paid for the actual location/food, and we had to pay for the invitations and decorations. We had to contribute $150.00 for that and also $50 for a present. I thought $150 each for just decorations and invitations was a lot of money and totally ridiculous, but I paid it. there are 7 girls in her bp so that comes to $1050 for that .

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Posted by Soon2BMrsMunzGunz


I asked for the same thing that is exactly why I am shocked about everything. I don't want to know anything, but now FH's aunt asked FH to go to dinner because she is depressed about the whole situation. I feel so bad about everything. I would rather not have a shower than to know that someone is upset about everything.

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That is a realy tough situation, now that it is in the planning stage, I'm not sure if you can talk to your MOH and ask he to go along with what you asked for - they could end up losing a deposit. I'm sorry I wish I had a good suggestion for you

Mmmmm....I hear you.

I didn't have a shower. But still....the girls had to pay around $200 for the dress, at least $100 for the Bach. Party, at least $30 for shoes...it adds up. I would be hurting if someone asked me to chip in for all those expenses...and then add a shower....

It depends on the shower and the situation. Are the BM paying for the whole shower? The few BP i've been in, the MOB paid for the hall and a few things here and there and the BM paid for their gifts, CP's, favors, prizes, etc. So it really depends on what your BM are contributing towards.

In reality, I don't think $200 is too much b/c it's probably going towards a gift and any extras. I spent anywhere from $100-200 on the showers where I was a BM.

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Posted by Nina_m74



I told my MOH that I don't want to know anything about the shower, but the only thing I ask is that they not go overboard, I would be very happy if the shower were a potluck in someone's backyard, a living room, park or firehall.

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This is what I had this past weekend. I loved it, the food was awesome, and I felt comfortable being in a place I knew. BUT - people STILL complained! So, just remember... you can't please everyone all the time...

The girls in my BP were not asked to contribute AT ALL. My mom threw my shower. My MOH insisted on purchasing the favors, but that was it.

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Posted by bigrd37

It depends on the shower and the situation. Are the BM paying for the whole shower? The few BP i've been in, the MOB paid for the hall and a few things here and there and the BM paid for their gifts, CP's, favors, prizes, etc. So it really depends on what your BM are contributing towards.

In reality, I don't think $200 is too much b/c it's probably going towards a gift and any extras. I spent anywhere from $100-200 on the showers where I was a BM.

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The BP is paying for everything. My mother is sick with Cancer has not been able to waork in about 6 months. So they are on their own. The thing is I think that they are doing it at someone's house, but are having it catered. I am not sure though. I really don't want anyone to be hurt or feel put out.

I'm sorry about your mother.

If it's in someone's house, then it shouldn't cost that much. I don't really know how much it costs to cater food in, but they don't have to get anything fancy. So I can't imagine it would be expensive.

Obviously you don't know what kind of favors, prizes for games or gifts they are planning on doing/giving, so no one can really say. That's a hard situation because your Aunt should tell them she'll put in what she can, but then the other BM's might get mad. Unless she explains her situation to them. I wish I could be more help!

I'm sorry about your Mom

I agree that FHs Aunt really should have spoken to the BP and should have been clear with them about what she feels she can contribute, you shouldn't have to deal with this stress.

I'm sorry this situation ever made it's way to your ears Maybe FH can ask her to discuss it with the BP and try to come up with a solution, like maybe she makes some dishes/desserts instead of contributing towards the catering?

As far as I know..............I thought the bridal party paid for the shower. With that said......depending on how many ppl actually come and where they have it..........it could cost about $200-$300. that you have to contribute.


If its only $200.00 that is needed to help contribute, then she shouldnt be complaining...........