I have a friend who I was close with for a couple of years. I was in her Bridal party when she got married. Since then, she has had two children and we have drifted apart. There are no hard feelings or anything, we are just both so busy that it is hard to see each other especially since her kids are so young. I want to ask her to be in the wedding, but at the same time I'm worried that it would be a lot for her since the wedding is in NY and she is in Ohio (my home town), I don't want her to feel obligated especially when she has two little ones. What do you guys think?
julesrbf
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Re: Bridal Party
It can't hurt to ask! If she can't swing it, she'll tell you, but I'm sure she will be thrilled that you thought to include her.
MarjorieFrank
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Re: Bridal Party
If you ask her you have to be aware that she may not be able to participate in her BM duties as much as someone close byand with less committments could. If you know this and are okay with this, then I think you should ask her.
SummerBride10
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Give her the option, but let her know you completely understand if she cant you'll understand.
RPMG26599
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I think definitely ask her and you can also add that you know it might be hard for her with the kids and the distance and if she doesnt think she can swing it, that she doesnt have to be in it.
springsandra
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One of my best friends moved to Beijing right after I got engaged. I asked her, and she said she'd try, but after some research, she found out it would cost $1600 to fly back for the wedding and she just couldn't afford it. So, I only have 2 girls instead of 3, but it's ok. I'm still glad I asked her.
Juhgail
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Re: Bridal Party
I thik you should ask her! Give her the option.
I have one girl who I did ask. She is a close and old friend. We talked about it since she will have a 1 month old at that point. SHE decided (with my blessing) that it would be too difficult. She wanted to make sure I was the focus, and she wasnt worrying about a baby all day.
She continues to be one of my closest friends! I also made it CRYSTAL clear to her that I only cared about SHE felt. There was NO pressure and I wanted her to be ok with the decision because I was ok with WHATEVER she needed to do.
No bridezilla here!
soontobemrsag
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Posted by julesrbf
It can't hurt to ask! If she can't swing it, she'll tell you, but I'm sure she will be thrilled that you thought to include her.
I agree let it be her decision if she can do it or not!
JAAMS
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If you really want to ask her, give her the option.
If she can't make that big of a commitment, maybe ask her to do one of the readings. That way she is still involved, but doesn't have to be worried about coming for fittings/planning a bach party/etc!
asg450
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Posted by SummerBride10
Give her the option, but let her know you completely understand if she cant you'll understand.
I agree. Let her know you would like her to be in your bridal party but also let her know that you will have no hard feelings if she cannot be a part of your wedding.
jcreilly
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i would ask tell her that you would like her to be part of it but would total understand if she could not be in it !!!
Nina1010
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Posted by julesrbf
It can't hurt to ask! If she can't swing it, she'll tell you, but I'm sure she will be thrilled that you thought to include her.
ITA... can't hurt to ask..
MrsCM
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Re: Bridal Party
I'd say 'what are your feelings about being in my wedding' its a really open ended way of asking without putting too much pressure and letting her tell you how she feels!
