I'm trying to figure out how to pick out the bridesmaids dresses. I have a MOH and 3-4 other maids (one I still need to ask!). I know I could pick out whatever I want for them--but I want it to be a nice dress that's (relatively) reasonably priced and that they can wear it again. I'm thinking of a fairly simple tea length dress. Luckily, they all have similar body shapes and are all very pretty so finding something that could complement them shouldn't be too hard!
Picking out the dress together will be very difficult (and I wouldn't want to imagine the disagreements!)--especially since 1 bridesmaid lives on the West Coast, 1 lives upstate without a car...oh, and I live in North Carolina!
So, this brings me to my question--should I just pick out the dress? Should I have 3 front runners and take a vote (or is this a brideocracy, not a democracy)? Should I just take my MOH (sister) so she can try on and choose (she's picky, so this could ease tension...or make things more difficult if she doesn't want to cooperate)?
What did you do?
Brian and Marie
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
I had 7 girls and at first I thought I wanted their input, that was until we actually all went shopping and I thought I wanted to die!! TOO many opinions!! After that I went shopping again with just my mom and MOH, and I picked out the dress with the help from them!
emcheung
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
it does get very overwhelming when everyone puts their input in. i think it's a lot easier to make your own decision and let your bm's know what you've chosen.
AS
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
Im the bride I get to pick out everything, my girls have no say
cherandgeo
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
I have 1 MOH and 3 BM and I tried this tactic with them too, asking then what style they feel comfortable in and what color out of the three that I gave them would they like the best. None of them would give me an answer and just kept telling me 'it's your wedding, we will wear whatever you want' I have one in Maryland, one in Virginia and 2 in Missouri, so no one could come shopping with me in NYC. This is the dress that I decided on and they all look great in it! I choose black that way they could order it wherever they liked and it wouldn't be so noticeable if the dye lot was off. It worked out great this way.
i tried to have everyone give me their input... but it wasn't working. I either hated what they were picking, or I knew the dress wasn't in everyone's price range.
What I wound up doing, is going with one of my BM's and had her try on a bunch of stuff.
I didn't end up ordering any of those dresses though. I found a dress I loved online and could get for a great price, but couldn't find it for the girls to try on. It's a basic strapless A Line dress so i figured it's safe.
Save yourself a headache, and just pick it out for them lol. I was never given a choice when I was a bridesmaid.
JennysMOH
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
It would be easier if you picked out what you would like them to wear. Remember more opinions mean more headaches
portjeffbride
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
well, I didn't want anything too matchy-matchy.... To add to the problem, one BM couldn't travel, and another was on the west coast.... I just told them to pick out whatever they wanted in ivory and black.... with a knee length skirt.
they looked great, and they looked like themselves
AND, I didn't have to get involved.... GOLDEN
PegaLega
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
I say pick a few that you like and let them go from there if you are willing to do that. That is what I did. It gives them the open communication and you still have a say
DGoldfarb0776
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
I have only one MoH and one BM- I got lucky and it wasn't a big deal for me as long as it's the color that I wanted and a tasteful style.
hyphenbride
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
Thank you for your advice! I'll probably do some combination of things. I just want my girls to be happy!
ilovedave1119
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
There is no way you can get girls to agree on anything! so my theory is whatever i pick they have to deal with! the only girls i'm bringing shopping with me is my sister/MOH and my FH's sister. They are both similar in tastes and style so i figure it should not be too bad. i still have final say though! haha
BNBride60
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
I'll share my experience with you...
I took my MOH and two best friends with me as 'representative' of the bridal party (so that's 3 girls out of 8). Even just taking the 3 of them was a NIGHTMARE. They had relatively free reign - I just wanted them to stick to a certain color scheme and they could've even manage that without complaining.
So, after that, I honestly went to every BM dress store and designer's website. Dessy, Jim Hjelm, Jenny Yoo, Bill Levkoff, etc., etc. Eventually I went back to Priscilla of Boston, where I got my dress, and I found two awesome dresses. I tried them on alone, then the next day I brought back FH and he picked between the two that I was torn between. Then I just told my BMs, I picked a dress, go order it.
In the end, the experience of bringing FH was so pleasant and fun. My FH isn't even a 'shopper' and is by no means metrosexual at all, but he still knew what dresses were 'nice.'
So, in the end, I'd say do NOT bring all your girls. If anything, bring just one of them if you think that wouldn't create jealousy. If it would, go alone and then seirously narrow it down before you bring another person (FH, your Mom, your grandma, etc.) in to help you finally decide.
o17range
Posted:
Member since
Re: Bridesmaid Dresses...Who Picks Out?
I let my girls pick out their own dress. Each had too different a personality and body type, and I was never a fan of looking like a clone the 7 times I've been a BM. I chose the color, and they could order whatever dress they liked the best in that color (they had free reign of the Dessy company of designs). I was 'warned' that there might be some 'subtle' difference in color because they'd be cut from different bolts, but in the end, if there was any difference in color, no one could tell. I didn't want the conflict either, and this was definitely a conflict-free resolution. 2 had different strapless dresses, 1 had a halter top, 1 had a v-neck and 1 had a boat neck. They looked great AND they all felt comfortable in their own skin!
