Bridesmaid Question

mf324 Posted: Apr 08, 2012 11:35 AM

Bridesmaid Question

Also posted this on Brides Helping Brides, but wanted to ask here too-----

Hey Ladies,

I'm beginning to ask my girls to be bridesmaids, and have a question about one in particular...

So my childhood best friend recently came out as a lesbian about 5 years ago. She now prefers to dress in mens clothes. I would really like her to be a bridesmaid, considering we've been best friends for 20 years. However, I am getting married in a church, and have a very conservative family, so I would like her to wear a dress.

What I've come up with is this-- asking her to wear a dress for my ceremony, and then at the reception, she can change into whatever she would like. Do you think that is unreasonable? Suggestions welcome.

LisaReyes Posted: Apr 08, 2012 04:01 PM

Re: Bridesmaid Question

I think that is a very fair suggestion! Hopefully she'll be comfortable with that. Personally, I would dress in a clown outfit for my best friends wedding if that's what she wanted.

Butterflyfaye Posted: Apr 08, 2012 04:56 PM

Re: Bridesmaid Question

I think that's a fair suggestion...

One of my High School friends had a similar dilemma. Fortunately, the bridesmaid was well known to the bride's family, who knew she was lesbian and had been around her for several years.

She dressed in the same color dress pants as the groom (same shade) then wore a dress shirt that was the same exact shade as the rest of the bridesmaids.

If she's a bridesmaid, it might be a desire to see her match exactly. If she's MOH - call it MOH priviledges if she really doesn't want to wear a dress.

Shanti12 Posted: Apr 08, 2012 08:30 PM

Re: Bridesmaid Question

I think that's reasonable, mostly because I can see it being very hard to match everyone if that's what you want. Even if you just want to match the colors, that can be pretty hard.

Kristin31613 Posted: Apr 08, 2012 10:49 PM

Re: Bridesmaid Question

One of my good friends is getting married this October and her sister is a lesbian. She is also serving as her maid of honor. She asked her sister to wear a dress and although she isn't comfortable, she is obliging. I'm sure if you have a convo, she will respect your wishes for the day.

mf324 Posted: Apr 08, 2012 11:21 PM

Re: Bridesmaid Question

thanks everyone!!! i will hopefully be having the conversation with her sometime this week (i want to wait to ask in person) so i'm hoping she will be ok with it!