Bridesmaid vent

Adrianna Posted: Oct 06, 2003 10:08 AM

Bridesmaid vent

I had posted before about how my MOH was going to school in Australia and wouldn't be back till a week before the wedding. Well after sharing my concerns with her about not being for my wedding, she called me a week to tell me that she doesn't want to be the MOH and that I should ask someone else. I said ok but I still want you as a bridesmaid.
Well my mother held a meeting this past Saturday with my bridesmaids, my new MOH (I asked my FSIL) and my MIL, when I asked if my ex-MOH was coming she said no, and her comment was 'Well if I am not going to be here for it then why should I help plan it', thats what she emailed back to my mother. My mother wasn't going to tell me but I asked. I don't think that is right what she is doing. I would that she would want to help out as much as she could. Do you think I should ask why she said that or just let it be?
Thanks for letting me share,
Adrianna

Boop2704 Posted: Oct 06, 2003 10:12 AM

Re: Bridesmaid vent

As much as I think you should call her out on what she said, I do think it would cause some more problems and possibly end your friendship. You don't need to add anymore stress for yourself and you shouldn't have to constatly be worrying if she is going to be in or out. I would let it go and just remember it when her time comes to get married. This is a happy time for you and you should not have to deal with problems from friends!! Good Luck with whatever you decide!!

hugs213 Posted: Oct 06, 2003 10:18 AM

Re: Bridesmaid vent

That was so wrong of her to say that. What is wrong with people. I wouldn't say anything now but just keep it in the back of your mind when the time comes that she needs you for something. I am sorry to say this but if that is what she said then she really isn't a good friend. I was going through the same thing with my MOH...I asked my BF of 13 years and the first words out of her mouth was 'Okay, but I don't have the money or the time to go running around with you doing wedding stuff' and 'Don't think that I am paying for a bridal shower, do you think I have the word ****er on my forehead?' I kindly told her then this is not for her and made her just a bridesmaid . (But I am going to remember those words and when the time comes when she gets married, she will know what it feels like)

neesiepie Posted: Oct 06, 2003 10:57 AM

Re: Bridesmaid vent

your ex-MOH sounds bitter and jealous....I would honestly have a talk with her. BE as nice as you can....maybe her feelings are hurt b/c you chose someone else as MOH? Even though she said to do it, maybe she assumed that is what you wanted...just to ease your mind? i mean, I think she is acting wrong, but I am trying to play the devil's advocate. Maybe you can just talk to her as friends. Remember, this girl is supposed to be your dearest,closest friend. If something is bothering her, you would know....and you DESERVE to know.

ChristineC68 Posted: Oct 06, 2003 11:29 AM

Re: Bridesmaid vent

I don't think that she should have responded to your mother like that. It's rude and you dont speak that way to your friends' parents.

As for particiaption in your shower - since she will be living half way around the world during the event and all the planning I can see where she would not feel the need to get involved. It would be nice if she showed some interest though.