Caiden's 1st B-day is coming up...

and soon his carseat will be turned around, he won't be drinking breastmilk or formula anymore, he's almost weaned from breastfeeding... I'm happy and sad all at the same time. He's a little boy now! I was just watching him yesterday and I can't believe how much he has grown. His personality changes constantly, and he's turning into a little man so quickly. I miss my baby boy! I was looking at pictures of him when we first brought him home, and I got tears in my eyes. I miss those first few months. Well, the first month was hard, but I still miss it. I can't believe it's been a year almost!

Awwh Melissa - what a big boy he's becoming.

I know Amber is still a baby, but I feel that way too, like her little life is flying by. She's starting to do such cool things now, like turn over, crawl. She's very ambidexterous with her hands (reaches for things like her binkie in the little cutout on her tray). She flips it around w/her hands, plays with toys, listens and looks forward to reading time. I know these are the best moments, but I also loved when I could hold her like a little doll and have her go to sleep in my arms as she ate. When I clean out the latest round of outgrown clothes, I feel so sad that she'll never wear this or that again. I also fear for her future and want to shield her from her first skinned knee, first hurt feeling, first heartbreak. I didn't really realize that being a mom would make you feel so helpless and yet so empowered. Lately I've been so sappy about things because of the extreme loss of children in Asia and that horrible baby dumping in Copaige over the weekend.