Catholic Brides - Church Question

korndoggie Posted: Dec 17, 2006 01:45 PM

Catholic Brides - Church Question

Ok, so I live in Connecticut and I am planning my wedding on Long Island because that is where I grew up and it's where most of my family is. My Dad's church (and the church I have gone to my whole life) is OLPH in Lindenhurst. I called them today to ask a couple questions and the preist (who didn't speak English very well) just kept asking why I wasn't getting married in Connectitut at my 'home' church. I tried to explain that OLPH was my church for a long time and I want to get married on Long Island but he still seemed reluctant.

Is anyone else not getting married at their 'home' church? I guess I am just looking for a visitor friendly place. I am working on having my reception at the Crest Hollow in Woodbury, so if there is something in that area it would be a plus.

You would think that they would just be happy that I want to get married in the church!

TIA!

jenafee Posted: Dec 17, 2006 02:01 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

I'm not getting married in my home church either. FH and I decided to get married where his parents got married.
The priest was very welcoming and was happy that we chose their church. I would call back again and speak to someone else if this priest was asking funny questions along with not having proper English. You want you and your guests to understand what he is saying at your cermony!!
HTH!

robinandjoe Posted: Dec 17, 2006 02:03 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

I live in Westchester and am getting married on LI too, i called the church that i grew up in (which is my parents' parish) and said that my parents belonged, and they didn't ask any questions. I agree with the post above, that you want your guests (and yourselves) to understand the priest at your ceremony! Why don't you call on a different day and see if there is someone else to speak to

leena07 Posted: Dec 17, 2006 02:55 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

Well im from California.. FH is from NY.
Im Catholic he is Orthodox. My dream was to get mairred in a Catholic Church we went to at least 30 of them in the area. (We are having our reception at Crest Hallow as well). We got nothing but no's, no's, and more no's. A priest even asked me if the only reason why i wanted that church was because i thought it was 'pretty'.!! I was so let down and disappointed, we finally got a BEAUTIFUL Greek Orthodox church.. they were very nice and welcoming.

Good luck on your search!!

Kara and Todd Posted: Dec 17, 2006 03:34 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

Call the rectory at St. Thomas the Apostle. Ask to have Deacon Anthony D'Auria call you back. He's incredibly friendly and nice, as are all the priests / deacons in the church. (I would recommend you not speak to Deacon John Ford; Deacon Anthony is far more approachable)

The rectory number is (516) 489-8585.

Deacon Anthony can at least tell you whether or not you can get married there even though it's not your home parish.

donegal419 Posted: Dec 17, 2006 04:19 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

Did you reiterate that OLPH is your parents' parish and it was your parish grpwing up where you received your other sacrmaents? once they know the parents or immediate family are parishoners, it is never a problem.... i wouldn't stress about it... you shoudl be able to get married there.

portjeffbride Posted: Dec 17, 2006 08:02 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

We're getting married at our new 'home church'.... (we registered as parisheners only a week before asking to get married there.... and they didn't mind. They said they would not allow unregistered couples, however). At any rate, if they said no, we would have returned to my mother's church.

I really suspect that part of your problem was that language barrier.... Double check that the priest understands you received other sacraments (communion/confirmation) there, and the parish is near and dear to your family. If family members still go there, all the better......

sfmullen Posted: Dec 17, 2006 09:19 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

I live in PA and had my wedding at my church in LI. I did my investigation and precanna at my home church in PA and they forwarded everything to church on LI and it was fine
FM me for any additional information. we got married at Our Lady Queen of Martrys in Centerport it was gorgous! highly recommend it

jeanla4c Posted: Dec 18, 2006 09:58 AM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

We got married in the church I grew up in on LI (we now live in VA)...had no problems at all....we did Precana and all in VA though. Hmmm....I thought it was quite common.

chellynyc Posted: Dec 18, 2006 10:48 AM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

We're getting married in my father's parish in Woodside, Queens and I live in Franklin Square....we've had no problems.

korndoggie Posted: Dec 18, 2006 11:46 AM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

Thank you all very much ladies. I spoke to my dad about it and he suggested a younger, more modern preist to speak to. I am sure everything will be just fine.

Thanks again!

eelharas4700 Posted: Dec 18, 2006 12:59 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

well i am not getting married at 'my' church. i agreed on fh church. i had to jump through hoops for it. i was baptized in a church in michigan bc my family is there and my parents were really young and didnt have a church here, so fh church needed all my certificates and a letter from my church in michigan granting me permission to be married in another church. i dont think it should matter what church you decide on, i dont think they can deny you.

Katie&Chris2006 Posted: Dec 18, 2006 01:04 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

DH and I live in NJ, but I grew up on LI and wanted to be married there. I did not, however, want to get married at my parents home parish because of issues they've had there over the last several years. We started attending St Francis de Sales when we were visiting my parents, and asked them if they would marry us. They were happy to, even though we werent registered or technically in their jurisdiction.

Good luck! This was a huge issue for us at the beginning as well and I thought it would never work out. It does though, trust!

thelastresort Posted: Dec 18, 2006 02:08 PM

Re: Catholic Brides - Church Question

OLPH are MAJOR ball busters...excuse the term. That's my FH's parish and they have always given his family hard times about christenings, religion classes, confirmations, etc. The monsignor there is very old school. If you deal with Father Jim you are much better off b/c he's more with the times.