choices
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I don't know how far anyone will have to travel if you are talking about a wedding in Montauk. One thing to keep in mind is the traffic. Although it won't be summer, it will be prime pumpkin and apple picking, which will bring day traffic. This shouldn't affect you too much if it is in the evening. It is gorgous out there in the fall though.
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I've heard great things about The Vineyard Caterers if you are interested in the vineyard. It looks like you will have lots of photo ops too.
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I am having my reception at the Vineyard Caterers in July '09.....it's nice because it is a working vineyard but you do not have to rent anything or pay a site fee as you do at a lot of the vineyards....it is also pretty affordable and has amazing picture opportunities on the grounds and nearby. Good luck with your search!