church horror story

Tonite FH and I went to go and meet with the pastor at my church to finalize the details for our wedding. Or so we thought, I'm really only renting the church because I am not having the pastor who is in charge there now officiate our nuptuals. I've been a member of this church my whole life. Long story short, the pastor was so mean and nasty to me because my fh is not the same religion as me and isn't converting before the wedding. I'm just so hurt and dissapointed. I wasn't aware of this rule and thought it would be ok because they allow non members to rent the church all the time and I'm bringing in my own officiant (which they typically allow). I started crying right there in the office after he asked my why would I really want to marr my fh. I'm so hurt and I've been crying the last 4 hours since we left. I guess its on to plan b, but I can't get over how mean and nasty this pastor was.

Thank you for reading, I know that you guys would really understand just how devastating this is

I'm sorry this happened to you - he is not doing the wedding I hope

So sorry Angee... I cannot believe the Pastor said those things to you and brought you to tears. He is not a spiritual man. I don't care what your creed is, you should preach openmindedness, forgiveness and all are welcome when you represent religion.

I recommend Pastor April when you finally find the right place to exchange vows. She is amazing and creates a personalized, beauitful ceremony for you and your FH.

So sorryyyyy.....

What religions are you two, if you don't mind me asking. My FH's C priest gave us a hard time about living together, he didn't say anything about us being different denominations (I'm Episcopalian/ FH is Catholic). I have heard that some Catholic priests test engaged couples, and say certain things to make you think. Mine sure did!!! With us and FH's brother. He basically asked us questions about what would happen if I was bad in bed eventually, and what if I got sick, what FH would do. My mom said the look on my face when I came home was horrible. I felt horrible.
My father basically summed it up for me: He said, 'You're going to take marriage advice from someone who isn't married?'

If you feel this way, maybe try another church, I'm sorry you had to go through this. I know how it feels!

I'm so sorry. That is not right for him to make you feel so bad and then actually question your love for your FH... Chelechel1's dad is right. The guy isn't married. he just doesn't get it!!!!

I['m sorry... Best of luck!!!!!!!!

That is so awful. I'm so sorry you had to deal with someone like that.

I had a sort of similar situation.
we met with the deacon and he wouldnt allow us to be married if fh didnt receive his confirmation(he was baptized & received communion) than he went on to saying you can marry someone who is Jewish in the church. its very confusing. we ended up going to another church who was willing to work with fh on getting his stuff done. (the 1st church priest actually wrote a note to the second church about the confirmation thing too)

Dont let other people judge you. ive cried those tears and in the end its just you and him.

eta: funny bc that was our original date. maybe they like giving trouble on that date

I am so sorry you had to go through that!!!

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Posted by GinaRandy2010

You have got to be kidding me. And people wonder why the younger generations tend to shy away from the church... the intolerance of anything other than their beliefs is ridiculous. I am so sorry he did this to you. It is completely unfair.

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ITA! I am sorry the pastor said this to you. I am in complete shock of how insensitive he was, a man that has dedicated his life to God to bring peace into people's lives brings you to tears. Unbelievable! Maybe it was not meant to be, you will find something that is right for the both of you.

Sorry sweetie, that is horrible that he would say those things to you. Hope everything works out.

omg that is not ok - i can't believe a priest would say something so deeply hurtful - and it's not like he could not have known how hurtful it would be. that's just wrong.

That's horrible! I'm so sorry that happened to you.