Cold feet...

pls help ladies! ok...so we got engaged back in november and still haven't books a place yet though we finally have a date in mind (3/20/10).

we are going back to the RH this weekend to hopefully talk abt price and draw up a contract.

i think i'm, getting cold feet though...i've always wanted a small wedding, i'm only looking to guarantee abt 75 people. would it really be worth it to go through the whole process of dj, flowers, etc for a small party?

would it be better to just do a dinner maybe? or anyone have ideas about how to turn the affair more initimate but still be a traditional wedding reception?

My sister had a beautiful wedding for only about 100 people. She had it at the East Wind in the ountry Gardens it was a small private building and it was intimate and charming. She had a small BP only 4 BM's (inc me as MOH) and everyone had a great time and it wasn't overdone. I think you are just a little nervous about the planning.

Why not wait until later in 2010 maybe you would feel more comfortable and less rushed planning for a date that isn't 9 months away

i guaranteed 75 ppl and my wedding is going to be offff the HOOK


its 1 thing if ur having doubts.. but if ur using having a 'smaller' wedding as an excuse... thats a whole other issue.

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Posted by soontobecruz

My sister had a beautiful wedding for only about 100 people. She had it at the East Wind in the ountry Gardens it was a small private building and it was intimate and charming. She had a small BP only 4 BM's (inc me as MOH) and everyone had a great time and it wasn't overdone. I think you are just a little nervous about the planning.

Why not wait until later in 2010 maybe you would feel more comfortable and less rushed planning for a date that isn't 9 months away

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if i could i would but i reallllllly want a winter wedding and the families would go nuts if we waited another year!

OMG - i didn't realize it was really only 9 months away....

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Posted by grkbarbie

i guaranteed 75 ppl and my wedding is going to be offff the HOOK


its 1 thing if ur having doubts.. but if ur using having a 'smaller' wedding as an excuse... thats a whole other issue.

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no doubt about getting married - just about how to do it. we spent months looking at places, stopped for a couple and think we should probably book a place. now i'm worried instead of doing a full out wedding, maybe a nice restaurant would be better. so torn as to what to do!

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Posted by bulldoglover

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Posted by grkbarbie

i guaranteed 75 ppl and my wedding is going to be offff the HOOK


its 1 thing if ur having doubts.. but if ur using having a 'smaller' wedding as an excuse... thats a whole other issue.

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no doubt about getting married - just about how to do it. we spent months looking at places, stopped for a couple and think we should probably book a place. now i'm worried instead of doing a full out wedding, maybe a nice restaurant would be better. so torn as to what to do!

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If you want the wedding w/o all the planning what about looking into places that offer package deals. I know Brentwood CC does it, and I know others do also. I am sure it is less stress.

If you WANT a restaurant go for it, but if you are just settling on the restaurant to avoid planning a 'wedding' I would be afraid you might regret it later on.... JMO

i agree - i think i would regret it even though i'm feeling stressed now.

party it is!

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Posted by bulldoglover

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Posted by soontobecruz

My sister had a beautiful wedding for only about 100 people. She had it at the East Wind in the ountry Gardens it was a small private building and it was intimate and charming. She had a small BP only 4 BM's (inc me as MOH) and everyone had a great time and it wasn't overdone. I think you are just a little nervous about the planning.

Why not wait until later in 2010 maybe you would feel more comfortable and less rushed planning for a date that isn't 9 months away

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if i could i would but i reallllllly want a winter wedding and the families would go nuts if we waited another year!

OMG - i didn't realize it was really only 9 months away....

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I totally understand where you're coming from. We wanted a destination wedding, one of the reasons being we didn't want some huge thing and wanted it small and intimate. But unfortunately I have a sick family member who is unable to travel, so we had to have something local. We decided to just have a traditionl wedding here. We are having it in a normal hall, only in one of the smaller rooms and had to guarantee 60 people. We are only inviting 100-120 tops maybe even less and will prob only have about 80 people or so. I even said to FH recently, does it make sense to do this, we could always just have a dinner with immediate family or something, but really this is once in a lifetime. If you have 40 or 300 people it's not going to matter. I love the fact we are having it in a more intimate place.

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Posted by Iluvpoodles

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Posted by bulldoglover

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Posted by soontobecruz

My sister had a beautiful wedding for only about 100 people. She had it at the East Wind in the ountry Gardens it was a small private building and it was intimate and charming. She had a small BP only 4 BM's (inc me as MOH) and everyone had a great time and it wasn't overdone. I think you are just a little nervous about the planning.

Why not wait until later in 2010 maybe you would feel more comfortable and less rushed planning for a date that isn't 9 months away

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if i could i would but i reallllllly want a winter wedding and the families would go nuts if we waited another year!

OMG - i didn't realize it was really only 9 months away....

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I totally understand where you're coming from. We wanted a destination wedding and one of the reasones being I didn't want some huge thing or bridal party. But unfortunately I have a sick family member who is unable to travel, so we had to have something local. We decided to just have a traditionl wedding here. We are having it in a normal hall, only in one of the smaller rooms and had to guarantee 60 people. We are only inviting 100-120 tops maybe even less and will prob only have about 80 people or so. I even said to FH recently, does it make sense to do this, we could always just have a dinner with immediate family or something, but really this is once in a lifetime. If you have 40 or 300 people it's not going to matter. I love the fact we are having it in a more intimate place.

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can't thank you enough for this post!! - makes a huge difference knowing that there's another bride out there that might have an idea of what's going through my mind. and you're right, it is once in a lifetime, celebrate!

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Posted by MrsC2010

i think you should do whatever makes you happy....if you are more comfortable just doing a small dinner with your closest family/friends then there is nothing wrong with that. Just as long as you won't regret later that you didn't have more of a party (with dj, etc)

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I agree with this. Sometimes i think that it would be better to just go to vegas and then have a small dinner with close family, and save sooo much $ but i know in the end that i will regret missing out on having my reception... again it is what you feel will make you happy. good luck!

everything will work out in the end. FH & I played with the idea of having 80 people for a nice simple restaurant style wedding. we looked at a few places & then went back to looking at a few places for 120 people. in the end we decided to invite 120 people & have our wedding at a hall & i couldn't be happier. yes its a lot of work but i just knew it was the best idea.

PS: i love your date (3/20/2010) that's mine & FHs dating anniversary & next year will be 10 years together

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Posted by JenBill61210

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Posted by MrsC2010

i think you should do whatever makes you happy....if you are more comfortable just doing a small dinner with your closest family/friends then there is nothing wrong with that. Just as long as you won't regret later that you didn't have more of a party (with dj, etc)

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I agree with this. Sometimes i think that it would be better to just go to vegas and then have a small dinner with close family, and save sooo much $ but i know in the end that i will regret missing out on having my reception... again it is what you feel will make you happy. good luck!

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LoL - i considered that too! i checked out the wynn in vegas but their packages were pricey!! i nixed that idea. it's actually cheaper to stay in town!

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Posted by christine2010

everything will work out in the end. FH & I played with the idea of having 80 people for a nice simple restaurant style wedding. we looked at a few places & then went back to looking at a few places for 120 people. in the end we decided to invite 120 people & have our wedding at a hall & i couldn't be happier. yes its a lot of work but i just knew it was the best idea.

PS: i love your date (3/20/2010) that's mine & FHs dating anniversary & next year will be 10 years together

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thanks!! just hope the CH still has that date avail

if you are having cold feet about the marriage, this is a differnet story, and you shouldnt rush into any plans just because your family doesnt want to wait another year for you to get married. you have to do it on your own time.

but if you are just anxious about the wedding, thats ok! wedding planning can be stressful, but keep it simple! you still have time to book djs and flowers and all that.

i always say that the best wedding that i went to was a small one (less than 100 ppl) because it was intimate and i got to spend time with the bride and groom.

that being said, if you have had the idea in the back of your mind to have a traditional wedding with the DJ and all, i say go for it. if you do a small dinner, you might have wished that you had something bigger. but if it is not set in your mind, go with the restaurant!

Sorry so long but Either one is going to be wonderful, spent with family and loved ones to celebrate your day!

i totally felt this same way! mainly because the church and area i wanted to get married at was waaaay to expensive. i asked FH if we could just get married and have a really nice dinner in teh city with just close family and friends. but you know when it comes to family, its just not that simple. he was afraid that the list would still balloon out of control...and that i would really regret it.

you will be fine. take it one step at a time.

GL!

all of you guys are the best! i think i'll feel better after we book the hall and hopefully everything will come into place.

we planned our entire wedding in 8 months. we wanted a winter wedding, and knew we'd have a smallish guest list. at first we were thinking do we really want to go all out and do the whole big wedding thing, but then we knew that just having a dinner at a restaurant for 80 people (our original guest list - we ended up w/ 100 guests) wasn't going to work for us. so in 8 months we did it all, booked the RH, DJ, photographer within a month after getting engaged. i bought my dress right away. 8 months really is enough time to plan a wedding, even if you're going all out.

i think you really just need to decide on what kind of celebration you want to have. if you think you and your FH would enjoy a dinner at a restaurant more, then that's what you should go for. if you want the more 'traditional' wedding at a RH w/ all the works, then that's what you should go for. the amount of guests really shouldn't matter. also, if you really want a winter wedding, a lot of vendors will work with you on price, or throw in extra things since it's their off-season. to have the same exact wedding we had in june or oct, it would have been a lot more $$. yes, we still spent a pretty penny on our wedding, but i wouldn't change a thing about it because we did it how we wanted, and everyone had a great time.

good luck!!