Okay maybe I am overeacting but I have less than 8 months till the wedding. FH will be having 'about' 6 or 7 guys, a few of which he hasn't asked. I still need a ringbearer and flowergirl (it will be FH's niece and nephew) and it is STILL, after more than one year of our engagement, not confirmed whether the kids (or should I say their parents) want them to do it. I am not too worried about the groomsman (his friends are pretty cooperative) but I would really love to know at some point if I am going to have a little ringbearer and flowergirl; it means a lot to me. The problem with FH is that he seems afraid to ask his sister's if they want their kids in it. One of his sister's is really overprotective and she may have issues with her son staying up late (he will be six), too much responsibility etc..... He did ask his sister and BIL about their son over Christmas and they haven't gotten back to him yet!! Why is this an ordeal?? Am I overeacting???
FeliciaDA
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Re: Confusion over bridal party
NO WAY are you overreacting .. I realize that it is a LOT of responsibility for the parents when you ask their children to be in your wedding party; however to leave you hanging isn't right, either. You have to make arrangements for flower girl dresess, boys tux, etc .. it cannot be left off to the last minute !!
That said, it is a little sticky since this is your in laws ... I asked my future bro and sis-in-law if their kids wanted to do it, and at first they were vague but now they seem happy to do it .. flower girl is only going to be 3 at time of wedding so that is why they hesitated at first, I think.
Its these little issues that can make you nuts during wedding planning!!
Sorry I couldn't help more - Good Luck!
KathleenG
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Re: Confusion over bridal party
Thanks for the feedback!!! When I discuss this with FH he looks at me like I am insane!!! To him, it is no big deal!!! We have enough to worry about then these issues!!! These are all preliminary issues which still haven't been worked out yet!!!
endlessluv429
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Re: Confusion over bridal party
I agree with you Kathleen. It shouldn't be such an ordeal for them to let you know. They need to let you know so you can plan for the attire for the kids, gift and so forth. Why wouldn't they want their kids in the BP? They should feel honored and excited! try to tell FH logically why you need to know. things have to get done! Do you have the kind of relationship with your FSIL that could talk to her about it? good luck! Let us know what happens!
JimmysBride
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Re: Confusion over bridal party
I had a similar problem. We just asked the FG over the holidays. The parents of one of the girls is kind of leaving me hanging. FH also has not asked his best man yet or THREE of the groomsmen. I'm pushing him to get it done this week!
KathleenG
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Re: Confusion over bridal party
I thought I was the only one with these unecessary ordeals (like I don't have enough to worry about). I have to go through FH for everything regarding his family (I am just not that comfortable myself). FH thinks that they have every right to take their time cause it is their kids and you can't question people when it comes to their children!!! I agree-but what about my wedding??? Isn't that a big deal as well???
FeliciaDA
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Re: Confusion over bridal party
Men just don't WORRY the way we do over things like this..!!
You wedding is MOST important, and I think its rather selfish that people hem and haw over giving definite answers to the most basic questions.
I feel your pain - I also have to go thru FH on his family issues, such as these, and it stinks b/c he just doesn't want to deal or call people and nail them down for answers, like I normally would ..
Let us know how it works out - Good Luck
May05Bride
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Re: Confusion over bridal party
Its a bit of a strange reaction I think. Most people would love for their kids to be FG or RB. My cousin's first words were, 'You already have a flower girl!' talking about her daughter.
And than, as soon as she got pregnant, 5 mnths ago, she was already Lobbying for new Ring boy! I told her, he will be too young, only a year, but she keeps hinting on him being a ring boy everytime a wedding conversation comes up.
