Contributions and Following Opinions

Okay, somewhat a 'vague' poll but I was just curious if you were receiving contributions from either side of your family, and they are giving you opinions (more like 'Oh, you need to look into X', when you planned on not even doing it), would you take into consideration that since they are contributing, you need to follow through on what they say?

Sorry if this is confusing anyone, I guess I was just curious if you feel obligated to include the opinions of others who are contributing to the wedding, even if it was something you didn't want or plan to do?

honestly, no I would not take things into consideration just b/c they are giving me money. I don't think it's fair for someone to say, hey, here's X amount of dollars, but you should look into doing this with it...

it's your wedding and if someone is going to contribute to it, it should be done with YOUR ideas, desires, and interests in mind...not what a third party thinks you should do.

if your being pressured, say something. if YOU feel guilty, don't. say thank you and have your day the way you'd like to have it...guilt free and ALL ABOUT JENN (oh yeah, and fh too! )

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Posted by JessicaM.

honestly, no I would not take things into consideration just b/c they are giving me money. I don't think it's fair for someone to say, hey, here's X amount of dollars, but you should look into doing this with it...

it's your wedding and if someone is going to contribute to it, it should be done with YOUR ideas, desires, and interests in mind...not what a third party thinks you should do.

if your being pressured, say something. if YOU feel guilty, don't. say thank you and have your day the way you'd like to have it...guilt free and ALL ABOUT JENN (oh yeah, and fh too! )

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Thanks, Jess! As always, perfectly stated!

I said other, because it depends on the request. Both my and FH's family are contributing to the wedding. My mom wanted us to break the glass at our cememony even though we're both agnostic and FH's family is catholic, because it would mean a lot to her. So for that one, I said yes. But for some details like color of BM dresses where people have opinions but don't really care one way or the other, then I'm following what I want. If my FILs had a tradition that they really wanted incorporated, then yes I would probably follow that as well, as long as it wasn't overtly religious (but more cultural instead). So stuff like that...

ETA: and okay, I know my mom really wanted a chinese food station at the CH, so I let her have it

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Posted by glinda_goodwitch

I said other, because it depends on the request. Both my and FH's family are contributing to the wedding. My mom wanted us to break the glass at our cememony even though we're both agnostic and FH's family is catholic, because it would mean a lot to her. So for that one, I said yes. But for some details like color of BM dresses where people have opinions but don't really care one way or the other, then I'm following what I want. If my FILs had a tradition that they really wanted incorporated, then yes I would probably follow that as well, as long as it wasn't overtly religious (but more cultural instead). So stuff like that...

ETA: and okay, I know my mom really wanted a chinese food station at the CH, so I let her have it

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I completely understand this and it is exactly the same with me. I did all the requested traditions, but the one that sparked this poll was something that started with 'You need to look into....'. LOL

everyone has an opinion, but we're doing what we want & how we want!