Crashing - Gift Help

Gift Help


My best friend is getting married next month. I love her to death but she’s pretty non-traditional. Her wedding is in PA and it is not a “Long Island wedding” (e.g. no band or DJ, just an ipod in the corner). FH and I are both in the BP (not best man or MOH). We’ve been best friends with them for about 7 years. They are both in our BP (not best man or MOH).

FH wants to give them $500 at their wedding. While, normally, I would think that’s an appropriate gift, I am 99% sure that even if we give $500, we won’t get it back at ours. I know that sounds selfish, but I just wanted some input.

What do you girls think? TIA!

I lived in PA and have been to many weddings. The ecomony and traditions are different than ours on the island. That said, if you guys are in the bridal party, I would give what you can afford and feel is appropriate, but NOT based on what you get back. Give whatever it is because you want to. I normally give $300. I have people coming to my LI wedding and they are unemployed currently. One is doing video and the other is just coming. When I went to theirs, I gave a monetary gift, but it is not to be for me. I just am so happy they are coming. I was appalled when one called and said she was told not to come by someone as she couldn't 'cover the plate'..I think people really think to think of the spirit of the event.