Deadbeat Bridesmaid

cjik Posted: Mar 10, 2005 11:34 AM

Deadbeat Bridesmaid

I have to vent. I'm only having two bridesmaids--my sister, and my FH's sister.

We went dress shopping and found a dress my sister liked, and she said was fine. My sister ordered hers two months ago, but FH sister still has nothing. I've called her twice and reminded her that a dress would need to be ordered quickly. Even offered to do it for her if she would give me her measurements. Still nothing and no communication.

I don't care if they both wear the same dress, but I do want them to wear a similar color, and I'm afraid she's not going to find much now. The wedding is in July. I think it's time to turn this over to FH, but I need to vent.

jesslangen Posted: Mar 10, 2005 11:38 AM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

Nothing is more frustrating than an uncooperative BM/BP. I would let FH know and see if he can talk to her. If she can't pull threw with her end of the obligations she should have never agreed to be a part of your special day.

o17range Posted: Mar 10, 2005 11:49 AM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

Yikes. I'm sorry to here FH's sister is not cooperating. Can you mention something to her mom--I know when my mom finds out I didn't do what was asked--it quickly becomes the priority!

Bunnymonkey Posted: Mar 10, 2005 01:01 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

You need to let someone else in on this - FH or her mom. The problem will be resolved!

LadyPrincess Posted: Mar 10, 2005 01:06 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

welcome first !!

from experience -if it becomes too much
keep the option open not to have her
in the BP

hope it works out

Katherine121 Posted: Mar 10, 2005 01:29 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

It's a drag when BP's don't cooperate. And even when you keep the BP small, there still manages to be drama. Maybe FH can help?

Dooodles Posted: Mar 10, 2005 01:59 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

has FH or her Mom mentioned anything to her yet??? what a pain to deal with this

cjik Posted: Mar 10, 2005 02:06 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

Thanks for all of your responses! I mainly wanted reassurance that I'm not acting like an anal, type A bride. I think it's time to pass this over to FH and he can decide if it's best for him to approach it or bring this to his mother.

I am glad I decided to forgo the shower and just do an outing with the maids, and a couple friends. My poor sister would probably wind up doing the whole thing herself!

Thanks again! I'm glad this site is here

littlebookworm4 Posted: Mar 10, 2005 09:14 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

and people say that having a large bridal party is harder...

Kim51103 Posted: Mar 10, 2005 09:22 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

I would def put it in HIS hands....it is his sister.....and uve tried ur best!!!

junebride! Posted: Mar 10, 2005 09:24 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

Good luck! I'd let FH handle it becasue no matter what you do, it could fall back on you...

busybee705 Posted: Mar 10, 2005 09:29 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

Posted by cjik

I have to vent. I'm only having two bridesmaids--my sister, and my FH's sister.

We went dress shopping and found a dress my sister liked, and she said was fine. My sister ordered hers two months ago, but FH sister still has nothing. I've called her twice and reminded her that a dress would need to be ordered quickly. Even offered to do it for her if she would give me her measurements. Still nothing and no communication.

I don't care if they both wear the same dress, but I do want them to wear a similar color, and I'm afraid she's not going to find much now. The wedding is in July. I think it's time to turn this over to FH, but I need to vent.

My wedding is in july too. I also have 2 bridesmaids (my sister and our friend). So far, they haven't given me any problems, but if I include my two cousins, it will get 10 times harder for me. But they're family and I'm supposed to ask them to participate, right?

jaylovesme Posted: Mar 11, 2005 08:17 PM

Re: Deadbeat Bridesmaid

i know how you feel. i kicked a bm out of my wedding party because of her not corparating. i felt i wasn't being fair to the other bms. my bms are wearing the same color and designer so i couldn't put the order in until everyone picked there dress, she didn't do it. i gave her a deadline and she never followed through, she i got sick of it and kicked her out. truce me i didn't want to do it, but you have to remember you don't want all different kind problems to worry about, especially this. see what your fh can do. really it's up to you to decide what to do about it. give her a deadline to have her dress picked out by a certain date, if she doesn't go by it, don't have her in the wedding party. good luck whatever happens. don't stress yourself to much