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Re: Advice Needed
I wouldn't wait for her to back out cuz she never will. I would just speak to her and basically tell her everything you just told us and see how she responds. Easier said then done I know.
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Re: Advice Needed
IMPO, I think you should just come right out and ask her. Most times a direct approach is better than playing games!
edit to add this
Oh and do it face to face
edit to add this
Oh and do it face to face
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Re: Advice Needed
Posted by AdriandSteve
I wouldn't wait for her to back out cuz she never will. I would just speak to her and basically tell her everything you just told us and see how she responds. Easier said then done I know.
ita...
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Re: Advice Needed
Posted by AdriandSteve
I wouldn't wait for her to back out cuz she never will. I would just speak to her and basically tell her everything you just told us and see how she responds. Easier said then done I know.
Ditto
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Re: Advice Needed
Well I don't think ignoring her is the answer to your problem. Honestly, I would just give her a call and find out whats going on. Maybe she has something going on thats hard to deal with or maybe something happened that your unaware of. You asked her to be a bm b/c your friends, so friends should be able to talk. I would start with a phone call and go from there.
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Re: Advice Needed
Honestly, I would just talk to her and maybe tell her 'I've been hurt that you aren't interested in the wedding and I've been thinking that maybe you're better off as a guest for the wedding. I'll reimburse you for the dress and I'm really sorry about this.' See what she says. If she's just an aquaintence and she freaks out on you, would you be THAT upset about it? And when she tried to talk to you about it later on or IF she becomes rude and some point, just tell her you're too busy and you're ordering clothes!
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Re: Advice Needed
Posted by StellaStar13
IMPO, I think you should just come right out and ask her. Most times a direct approach is better than playing games!
edit to add this
Oh and do it face to face
Yeah but what do I say..I do this on the phone, an email. I would rather me non confrontational about it but I don't know. Won't I be technically kicking her out of the BP which is a supposed nono?
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Re: Advice Needed
Posted by ourwedding9510
Honestly, I would just talk to her and maybe tell her 'I've been hurt that you aren't interested in the wedding and I've been thinking that maybe you're better off as a guest for the wedding. I'll reimburse you for the dress and I'm really sorry about this.' See what she says. If she's just an aquaintence and she freaks out on you, would you be THAT upset about it? And when she tried to talk to you about it later on or IF she becomes rude and some point, just tell her you're too busy and you're ordering clothes!
I've known her since we were kids, that's the thing, at one time, we were close..
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Re: Advice Needed
I am having this same exact issue...although I am not ready to confront the person yet...still kinda waiting for her to call me...I am curious to see how this turns out for you.
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Re: Advice Needed
Posted by Iluvpoodles
Posted by StellaStar13
IMPO, I think you should just come right out and ask her. Most times a direct approach is better than playing games!
edit to add this
Oh and do it face to face
Yeah but what do I say..I do this on the phone, an email. I would rather me non confrontational about it but I don't know. Won't I be technically kicking her out of the BP which is a supposed nono?
say that youre worried that she doesnt want to be in it anymore, because you lost touch with each other... honestly, it takes two people to loose touch.... so I wouldnt kick her out because of it..
as far as kicking someone out being a nono... its your BP you do whatever you need to do... ettiquite is such BS....
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Honestly, I would just leave it the way it is, since she already left a dep on the dress and all. I don't know-i'm a very non confrontational person, so maybe that's why.
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Ignoring her is not going to make her back out. In fact it will just make you look bad (IMO). You should set up a lunch date and tell her in person 'Hey I feel really bad we are not as close as we used to be, I dont want you to feel put out by this wedding. If you dont want to be in the BP any more I understand' and see how she reacts.
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Re: Advice Needed
Posted by StellaStar13
IMPO, I think you should just come right out and ask her. Most times a direct approach is better than playing games!
edit to add this
Oh and do it face to face
ITA
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Re: Advice Needed
Posted by AngnShaun
Posted by Iluvpoodles
Posted by StellaStar13
IMPO, I think you should just come right out and ask her. Most times a direct approach is better than playing games!
edit to add this
Oh and do it face to face
Yeah but what do I say..I do this on the phone, an email. I would rather me non confrontational about it but I don't know. Won't I be technically kicking her out of the BP which is a supposed nono?
say that youre worried that she doesnt want to be in it anymore, because you lost touch with each other... honestly, it takes two people to loose touch.... so I wouldnt kick her out because of it..
as far as kicking someone out being a nono... its your BP you do whatever you need to do... ettiquite is such BS....
ITA...this is pretty much what I was going to say to you!
