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LindyBride22 Posted: May 06, 2010 10:03 AM

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Deleted just in case. Thanks for your help everyone.

allornil Posted: May 06, 2010 10:08 AM

Re: BM question

I wouldn't ask her. She'll be way involved in her own wedding. I'd tell her that too. 'I really wanted to ask you to be in my BP, but I thought it wouldn't be fair to you, since you'll be so busy planning your own.'

Then say, but I love talking about our weddings together. Why don't we keep bouncing ideas off each other to make it easier?

Something like that.

StaceyWill Posted: May 06, 2010 10:09 AM

Re: BM question

Honestly, I would just leave it as is. I would have a heart attack if I was planning my own wedding, a MOH in a wedding a month after mine and a BM in a wedding a month before mine.

LadyDuda81509 Posted: May 06, 2010 10:10 AM

Re: BM question

If you feel you really want her to be part of your special day then i would ask her! give her the option tho, if she thinks it will be too overwhelming then tell her not to feel obligated to be in it, but because she is there for you, you would feel bad not asking!

i know you've only known her a year but that shouldnt be the reason not to ask her! one of my bm's that ive known the shortest amount of time was prob one of the grestest helps to me during my planning etc.

hope that helps! good luck!

kedra5 Posted: May 06, 2010 10:10 AM

Re: BM question

I dont think its strange at all to ask this late especially since you have grown so close lately. I'd present it to her in a way that she doesn't feel pressured to say yes in the event that she's already overwhelmed. I think it would make her feel really great that you asked her!!!

AwaitingAugust Posted: May 06, 2010 10:17 AM

Re: BM question

Posted by LadyDuda81509

If you feel you really want her to be part of your special day then i would ask her! give her the option tho, if she thinks it will be too overwhelming then tell her not to feel obligated to be in it, but because she is there for you, you would feel bad not asking!

i know you've only known her a year but that shouldnt be the reason not to ask her! one of my bm's that ive known the shortest amount of time was prob one of the grestest helps to me during my planning etc.

hope that helps! good luck!

i agree with every single word of this

i've known each of my BMs for at least 7 years each ... yet i've known my MOH for only 2 years! time doesn't make people grow closer together ... personalities do!

LindyBride22 Posted: May 06, 2010 10:27 AM

Re: BM question

Thanks everyone! Thats kind of how I was feeling too. I would definitely make it clear that its totally up to her and I would understand if shes feeling too stressed out. I just wish I hadnt waited so long. And it will probably be even longer by the time I finally make a decision, lol

FutureMrsDe Posted: May 06, 2010 10:31 AM

Re: BM question

I wouldn't . You can ask her to be involved in other ways like do a reading or something.

SoonToBeMrsONeill Posted: May 06, 2010 10:35 AM

Re: BM question

Posted by allornil

I wouldn't ask her. She'll be way involved in her own wedding. I'd tell her that too. 'I really wanted to ask you to be in my BP, but I thought it wouldn't be fair to you, since you'll be so busy planning your own.'

Then say, but I love talking about our weddings together. Why don't we keep bouncing ideas off each other to make it easier?

Something like that.

ITA!

LindyBride22 Posted: May 06, 2010 10:44 AM

Re: BM question

Haha, now I'm not sure again lol. I did think about having her be involved another way, but I have a feeling she wouldnt be so into doing a reading. I mean, really being a BM wouldnt make her do anything that she isnt doing already, but I do totally understand how it could feel like extra stress. I guess I'll keep thinking about it....

SoonToBeMrsONeill Posted: May 06, 2010 10:46 AM

Re: BM question

Posted by LindyBride22

Haha, now I'm not sure again lol. I did think about having her be involved another way, but I have a feeling she wouldnt be so into doing a reading. I mean, really being a BM wouldnt make her do anything that she isnt doing already, but I do totally understand how it could feel like extra stress. I guess I'll keep thinking about it....

Well that's a super sweet idea! To have her read... maybe tell her something along the lines of, i know youre stressed with your own wedding and that's why i did not ask you to be a bridesmaid but i would feel honored if you would do the 1st/2nd reading for ours...

:)