Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
roan126
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Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
I'm a having a disagreement with my mother about who to invite to my shower, and we can't seem to agree. How has everyone else handled this?
I have a few cousins who live out of state, whom I am not particularly close to. I personally don't feel they should be invited to the shower; I know for a fact they won't come, and I feel inviting them would seem like I'm only asking for a gift. I don't feel right about this.
My mom sees it another way...she feels that they may be insulted if they are not invited, because their local sisters and mothers WILL be invited. She thinks that we should invite anyone that we'd normally invite as if they were local, regardless of where they live.
What to do?
Kimbalina
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
We plan on inviting all the women who are invited to the wedding..except the men who are invited and they have a g/f or ect,.. that i do not know or am not close to
Espo22
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
Yes BUT its FMIL's sister we invited so we had to, i think they would be pretty mad if we didn't lol. She lives upstate though not that far away, it less than 2 hours away. Plus her three daughter in laws which again have to be invited and they also live upstate
mariaobride
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
I have cousins that live far away that we decided not to invite to the shower- for my sisters wedding we didnt invite them either because we didnt want them to feel obligated to travel far- they were never insulted in fact they appreciated that we were being considerate of them- if you arent that close with your cousins i do not think they will be insulted at all
Ilovebriani
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
if your cousins families and mothers are also being invited i would invite them, i personally would be insulted if iwasnt invited, and even knowing they prob cant make it you can mention to their mothers or family that you know they prob cant make it and you dont want them to feel obligated to get you a gift. or you can have someone call their families and ask what they think, that was what my mom did when she wasnt sure
truelove5803
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
we invited all the woman going to the wedding to the shower. FMIL and FSIL insisted on it. I gave up.
Shelly9697
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
I have a lot of out of state family also & I am inviting them. They can come, not come, send a gift, not send a gift, whatever!! They will do what they want regardless!! I just feel that they are family & should be invited!! Plus they invited me to all their showers, weddings, etc. as well. I wouldn't worry about feeling like you are just asking for a gift.
PauliesGirl
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
i understand what you are saying but you never know...they may come and they may also feel upset if not. I'd invite and leave it up to them.
futuremrsfab
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
I think that if they are invited to the wedding they should be invited to the shower but jmo
Mici n KC
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
I'm inviting people from OOT. I know several won't be coming, but I'm still inviting them.
jessica08bride
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
I can see both sides. i am inviting people out of state. I know they can't come but I do feel i have to extend the invite. The thought of it feeling like I am asking for a gift has crossed my mind so many times, so I totally know how you feel. However, I think its right to extend an invite. Especially if you are inviting other members from the same family...i feel like you have to invite everyone, no matter where they are located.
minibride08
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
Posted by Mici n KC
I'm inviting people from OOT. I know several won't be coming, but I'm still inviting them.
ME TOO!
DeeluvsVinny
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
If you would invite them if they lived local, I'd stay you still have to invite them. It's up to them if they want to come and if they don't there's not rule that says they HAVE to send a gift..but I would be insulted if I was in their shoes...
LauraD419
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
The only oot-ers that were invited were close family!
SparkyandAng
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
I think your Mom is really my Mother. I'm having the same exact issue. My girls are paying for the shower so I want to invite every woman that is invited to the wedding. It's too much for them to pay for.
Haven't quite worked it out yet...sorry I know that isn't much help.
snwb08
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
i'm not inviting my friend who lives in boston even though i was invited to hers i'm trying to keep it to just family and really good friends. but i am inviting my friend in L.A.
IMO, if they are cousins i'd invite them regardless. I get you on the expecting a gift thing - that's a tough call but family should be invited no matter what.
Wifeynella
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
i am hoping to just invite family and close friends to my shower. i'd like it to be small, about 40-50 people. if i invited every woman, i'd be about 90.
my advice is to draw a line and stick with it... if you are inviting other cousins or FH's cousins, you should invite the out of state ones too. people are very touchy about such things so its better IMO to just invite.
roan126
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
Thanks for all of your help! Its just tough- some of them I have absolutely no contact or relationship with at all. I think they might find it weird to receive an invitation to my bridal shower.
Snick n Nick
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
Posted by DeeluvsVinny
If you would invite them if they lived local, I'd stay you still have to invite them. It's up to them if they want to come and if they don't there's not rule that says they HAVE to send a gift..but I would be insulted if I was in their shoes...
Agreed! If you're inviting their immediate family, than I think you have to!
nifheim
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Re: Did anyone invite non-local people to their shower?
we invited only people within driving distance and that is how we cut off people. The people out of state didn't show up and people who lived upstate didn't show up.
