Dilema!!!!!!

curlyq4458 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 09:51 AM

Dilema!!!!!!

What do I do? Please help!

I used to work with a girl we were friends, not hang out buddies, just work friends and we would always talk about life, men, family, etc...

I haven't seen her in about 1 1/2 yrs, but we email every so often.

She knew I was getting married, but just sent me an email saying how hurt she is that she didn't make the cut to come to m y wedding. I feel horrible...what do I say? We were just work buddies, and I didn't think twice about it...you girls know how hard it is to make your weddng list....what do I do? How do I respond?

debzy Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:00 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

Just say that you are sorry and you value her friendship but you had to keep numbers low for budget reasons. Say you hope she understands but you were only able to invite your very closest friends.

Or, say...you never got your invitation? And then say of course you were invited! That damn USPS!

pandafish519 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:02 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

Posted by debzy

Just say that you are sorry and you value her friendship but you had to keep numbers low for budget reasons. Say you hope she understands but you were only able to invite your very closest friends.

Or, say...you never got your invitation? And then say of course you were invited! That damn USPS!

ITA! if anyone asks me i would be happy to tell them that we needed to keep our numbers low...

OR tell them their invite got lost in the mail!

curlyq4458 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:03 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

HAHA! I was going to say that...

what would you do?

michelle1024 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:03 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

Posted by debzy

Just say that you are sorry and you value her friendship but you had to keep numbers low for budget reasons. Say you hope she understands but you were only able to invite your very closest friends.

Or, say...you never got your invitation? And then say of course you were invited! That damn USPS!

ITA!!!

DINAAMATUCCIO Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:05 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

Yeah I had to make believe that 3 invites got lost in the mail for my shower !! i hate hurting people's feelings

9509Bride Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:06 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

That is pretty rude of her IMO. Also who would want to be invited out of pitty? Clearly if she didnt make the list you had your reasons, why should she expect you to explain yourself to her? who the heck is she...

Be honest or feel free to use anyone of my lines:

FH and I both have large families.

Due to budget constraints in this economy, we have been forced to drastically reduce our guest list.

Ideally we would have loved to invite all our friends but our budget/venue can only accommodate a set number of people.

These are just a few. To be honest, this would tick me off. it is one thing to say 'oh I wish I could be there' and it is quite another to step to you as if you owe her something.

curlyq4458 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:06 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

uuugh! Its horrible.

littlepixie12 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:09 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

I personally cant believe that people would send you email saying that they are hurt and this and that... I think that is so rude, IMHO. I mean you said yourself that you havent seen her in over a year, did she really expect to get one? I dont understand some people

curlyq4458 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:09 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

TIA!

MrsGRod09 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:09 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

Just say you are sorry but it is a family only affair.

B2B 2009 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:20 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

I would tell her your having family and very close friends only .. I agree that it is rude!!! But I am not surprised as you find when planning a wedding that weddings bring the rudeness out of people for some reason?! Don't worry about it though and don't feel bad .. i think it's a very understandable explanation

curlyq4458 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:22 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

absolutely...I appreciate it ladies....

EsquireBride Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:23 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

I told people that (and it is true) that we kept the wedding very small, just family, family friends and our closest and oldest friends, because of cost and other considerations. Almost everyone understood. Those that didn't probably aren't even worth keeping as acquaintances (sp?). We had a 70-ish person wedding, so pretty much they realized that they weren't more important than a cousin or a friend for 10+ years....

Celeste617 Posted: Apr 08, 2009 10:25 AM

Re: Dilema!!!!!!

Posted by littlepixie12

I personally cant believe that people would send you email saying that they are hurt and this and that... I think that is so rude, IMHO. I mean you said yourself that you havent seen her in over a year, did she really expect to get one? I dont understand some people

I agree 100%. What is the matter with some people?!? Seriously... If I got an email like that I would laugh my a$$ off and still not invite her. It's not like it was an honest mistake - the girl didn't make the cut! So be it! Why do some people have to be so over dramatic?!? (the girl, not you hunny!)