Dilemna! Any advice?

Okay, so a friend from college got engaged almost right after me and she's getting married next month in New Hampshire.

She sent me an invite. I was pleasantly surprised because we haven't seen eachother in a couple of years but she's one of those people who I've always been fond of of lost touch with. I also know her FH and he's a good guy.

My problem is FH and I are really tight on money right now. The hotel is like 250+ a night which in addition to boarding our 2 dogs, can get over $500 fast. That's not including the wedding gift of course.

I would like to see her get married and it would be nice to see some other people I haven't seen in a while but I'm so stressed about money. It's right around the same time as another 1500 payment to our RH.

FH doesn't know either of them so he say's it's up to me.

Should I not go and send $$ gift?? But then how will it look if I invite them to our wedding next year? like we expect them to come when we didn't go to theirs or give us $$??

What would you do?

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Posted by AngnShaun

i would say no and send a gift... you cant stretch yourself too thin... you have obligations for your own wedding and related expenses

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And i think she would understand because she contacted me by saying 'I know you have alot going on planning your own wedding but I wanted your address to invite u to mine if you can make it...'

I just feel bad because like I said, I really like this girl and would like to see her after losing touch. Just bad timing. I just feel like I would lose an opportunity to reunite if I don't go

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Posted by mybabylovesmoi

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Posted by AngnShaun

i would say no and send a gift... you cant stretch yourself too thin... you have obligations for your own wedding and related expenses

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And i think she would understand because she contacted me by saying 'I know you have alot going on planning your own wedding but I wanted your address to invite u to mine if you can make it...'

I just feel bad because like I said, I really like this girl and would like to see her after losing touch. Just bad timing. I just feel like I would lose an opportunity to reunite if I don't go

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Is there anyway you can stay at a different hotel? Maybe somewhere cheaper. Maybe have a family member dogsit for you?

Though honestly, I don't think you should go. It s*cks, but she should understand. Does she live in NH? Maybe you guys could get together soon and like meet halfway between here and NH?

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Posted by jilliibabii


Is there anyway you can stay at a different hotel? Maybe somewhere cheaper. Maybe have a family member dogsit for you?

Though honestly, I don't think you should go. It s*cks, but she should understand. Does she live in NH? Maybe you guys could get together soon and like meet halfway between here and NH?

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yeah, she's from there but is currently going to dartmouth for school. That is one reason we've lost touch after graduaiton. I just mapquested, its 6 hrs. arghhh.

FH's parents usually watch our dogs but they are in portugal. My parents still work and they won't dog sit. maybe if we still had one dog I might be able to convince them but they strongly were against me getting another.

My friends all rent and probably can't watch them...also feel bad about asking them to watch 2 dogs.

boooo. I'm searching more hotels now...even for ones that may allow dogs...

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Posted by AngnShaun

i would say no and send a gift... you cant stretch yourself too thin... you have obligations for your own wedding and related expenses

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ITA!! im going through the same thing now .. we have an RH payment this month so unfortunately everyone this month is getting DROPPED..

they will understand.... i think everyone got the memo by now.. ITS A RECESSION hun... send a gift and keep it moving..

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Posted by mybabylovesmoi

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Posted by jilliibabii


Is there anyway you can stay at a different hotel? Maybe somewhere cheaper. Maybe have a family member dogsit for you?

Though honestly, I don't think you should go. It s*cks, but she should understand. Does she live in NH? Maybe you guys could get together soon and like meet halfway between here and NH?

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yeah, she's from there but is currently going to dartmouth for school. That is one reason we've lost touch after graduaiton. I just mapquested, its 6 hrs. arghhh.

FH's parents usually watch our dogs but they are in portugal. My parents still work and they won't dog sit. maybe if we still had one dog I might be able to convince them but they strongly were against me getting another.

My friends all rent and probably can't watch them...also feel bad about asking them to watch 2 dogs.

boooo. I'm searching more hotels now...even for ones that may allow dogs...

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Ooh that's a good idea- pet friendly hotel!

Trust me, I hear ya about the 2 dogs thing. My parents would still gladly take them both but I would never do that to them! Instead, they watched one of the dogs at their house and then the other dog stayed at my house and I usually have my MOH or my sister come over and watch the other dog.

If it comes down to the fact that you can't afford it, I'd send her a note in the card explaining all this to her. She'll understand!

thanks girls, I really appreciate a third party opinion.

'I'll do whatever.' doesn't really help (my fh).

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Posted by KN2011

Will there be other people there that you know? Is it possible that you can go yourself, so you dont have to get someone to watch the dogs?

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There are a couple of girls that I haven't seen either but they've remained close so I don't want to feel awkward. Also, don't know if they are all bringing dates....

that's a tough one, I'd say try to find a dog friendly hotel if you can, if not just explain to her and then send a gift.

Why can't you go and leave FH home with the 2 twos

See if any of your other friends are going solo and split the hotel room

FH and I go to weddings alone all the time if the other can't make it because of work or $$$ problems [1 guest means a smaller gift]

Just my suggestion