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Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

SeaMaiden Posted:

Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

x

Snowflake08 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

he is right
they are not allowed to ask that
truelove5803 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

OMG I can't believe they would ask that! I think your FH is right they aren't allowed to ask stuff like that. I would be honest with them. You never know what they are looking for. but I would try to step away from that or even ask why?

Ilovebriani Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

yeah they are NOT allowed to ask that! i would lie and tell them i am single. (i know it sounds horrible if you get hired)..but then again...do u rally want to work for a company who will base whether or not they hire u on that???

snowcutie82 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

Posted by Snowflake08

he is right
they are not allowed to ask that


yup...i agreee. its discrimination if they dont hire you on the basis of that etc. (at least thats what i think i remember form class )

i believe u dont need to answer...but ive never been asked that so i wouldnt know how to handle it. was it like just to have small talk and be personable or did it seem like they were asking because they were relating it to work? i mean i guess some ppl just dont know that they arent supposed to bring stuff like that up...depending on the context of the conversation???
SeaMaiden Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

x

SeaMaiden Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

x

madseason Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

Everyone is right!! How dare they!!! thats wrong!

Mrs. V 2008 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

Posted by snowcutie82

Posted by Snowflake08

he is right
they are not allowed to ask that


yup...i agreee. its discrimination if they dont hire you on the basis of that etc. (at least thats what i think i remember form class )

i believe u dont need to answer...but ive never been asked that so i wouldnt know how to handle it. was it like just to have small talk and be personable or did it seem like they were asking because they were relating it to work? i mean i guess some ppl just dont know that they arent supposed to bring stuff like that up...depending on the context of the conversation???


i agree! its definately discrimination
jgl Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

they really can not ask you that.. and I think next time you should call them out on it!

thank is soooo wrong

they can't use that in their decision making!

Out of curiouslity.. and you dont have to answer.. what type of job are these interviews for?
Kris10546 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

I agree with other posters, I believe it is illegal to ask that question but I think they want someone who is married or engaged because they need someone who is stable rather then a single person who can just pick up and leave if they want. Either way, its not right to ask that on an interview...I NEVER ask the people I interview that question!

csorisi Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

Nobody interviewing you should be asking you that question. It is none of their business. I was in this situation in '05. I was engaged and getting ready to graduate from law school. At first I didn't wear my enggement ring to interviews because I didn't want potential employers to see it and then assume that after I got married I was going to get pregnant & leave (which of course is ridiculous and it shouldn't matter if I did or didn't have that in mind). Anyway after about 5 interviews I realized that by not wearing my ring I wasn't being myself--I was n engaged woman looking for a job and if someone doesn't want me because I am engaged and is going to assume things then I don't want to work there. Good LUCK on your interviews.

michellecarin Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

Good luck...but you definitely do not want to work at a place that does those things. I wouldn't lie b/c then you put yourself in a akward sit. when you are there. Be yourself.
jackie311 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

It's definitely an inappropriate question to ask. My job requires a lot of international travel and I know that a few of the females that I work with did not wear their rings to their interviews. They were scared that a married or engaged female had a lesser chance of getting the position. They may or may not have been right by thinking that, but bottom line is do what you feel is right for you. Ufnfortunately, people are going to assume things and judge and sometimes it forces us to 'lie' and that sux and it shouldn't be that way!!

MrsQ-in2007 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

Not only is it inappropriate, it IS illegal. I work in HR. Employers are not allowed to ask that to prospective employees.

Next time someone asks you that, I would say, 'I'm surprised you ask me that since it's illegal to ask that in an interview'. Of course, that might make them not want to hire you because you called them out on something illegal, so you may not actually want to say this if you want the job.
Autumn08 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

It's such a difficult and unfair situation. In this day and age many men are in the forefront of childcare. So to ask women this first of all is wrong, but not to ask men? I have no clue what to say. Technically you can say no you aren't married, because you are not. But this makes me so mad!!!!

Not as big a situation but the deli near me always serves the men first. Even if all I need to do is be rung up and they can take my money they make me wait and help the other male customers. I just walk out and they can take the loss (I don't even go there anymore). This is America and we are supposed to be equals and it saddens me the old stereotypes still live on.

I mean how are you supposed to live on long island without the two incomes???

Hey you could always call channel 7!
SeaMaiden Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

x

Soon2BMrsD Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

Posted by SeaMaiden

and i NEVER wear my ring to interviews, i learned that quickly after my first interview....my employer said to me, 'well after you get married you can switch onto his insurance' and i thought WHAT!!! i paid 70K to be a physician assistant and now i have to go on his insurance?!?! Ridiculous!!

My job was looking for a PA we never hired one but if you want when i go back to work on sunday ill ask if there still looking?? were a family orientated office! its a clinic and very busy.. please let me know if you would like me to ask.

Good luck! and if they dont want to hire you b/c your engaged/married/ have children.. then its their loss not yours be happy they didnt hire you!
Fall Bride 2008 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

They are not allowed to ask that.

Smiles111 Posted:

Re: Do i have to tell prospective employer I'm engaged?

It's illegal to ask that on an interview.

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