do you ever just feel....

ugh I feel like this every day.

and i dont involve my mom either for the same reasons and I get the same guilt trip. Ive learned over the years that its yourself you have to please.

life is stressful enough to add this wedding planning on top of it.

---

Posted by allornil

ugh I feel like this every day.

and i dont involve my mom either for the same reasons and I get the same guilt trip. Ive learned over the years that its yourself you have to please.

life is stressful enough to add this wedding planning on top of it.

---

thank you..I just needed to know that someone else gets this sometimes..I feel like I just keep letting people down.

let me tell you a story. there once was a girl named Amy, who had a wedding i 1995 at westbury manor. Amy was VERY excited to plan this wedding until her mom hated everything she liked. Amy eventually gave in and let mom choose dress, flowers, food, photographer...everything.

on the day of her wedding, Amy was very unhappy bc nothing showed her personality.

The end.

im so sorry you are stressing out about everything.. but i think your looking at the whole pic and thats whats making all of this very overwhleming!!! break it down little by little one thing at a time and everything will work out!
It seems very hard to even break down but just try to! the ball will start rolling once you do.

I know how much someones opinion can change your would vision for your wedding upside down.. espically if it is someone who you really respect there input. But you also have to remember this is YOUR wedding and when you look bad you should LOVE everything about it.. from the littlest touch to the biggest! Not everyone is going to love everything you do.. but you will! and I've learn this already no matter how much you try you will NEVER please everyone.. so just stop trying because the only one that will stress out is you!


and going back to school! that is a HUGE thing! and i give you a lot of credit for even thinking about it! pat your self on the back! thats great news!

hang in there! im sorry your stressing some times life is very over whleming :(

The only way I was able to deal with any problems my mom and I had during the wedding was to think this, 'It's a big change for her as well and although all parents want to see their children married they also know that things are never going to be the same again.' So it might just be hitting her now which is why she wants you to ask her opinion more. Is there anything about the wedding that your 'whatever about' that she can take the lead on? Even if it's something small like table numbers, place cards etc?

As for school, be careful with going back to teach health and gym. That's one of the HARDEST jobs to get on LI cuz each school only needs 1-4 teachers. I feel you though with the school prob. I have my MA and going back for my 2nd cuz my 1st was pointless.

Try to take each day as it comes and not look too too far ahead. (sounds stupid I know)

I feel that way and it's really difficult Just yesterday my mom was asking me why I picked the picture for my save the date when there were so many others that were better

Geee thanks, everyone already got them so it's too late and you just make me second guess myself. She is also CONSTANTLY nagging me about the cost of the wedding even though FH and I initially wanted a SMALL DESTINATION WEDDING and we had to change that accomodate all of my parent's friends

I have also been working like a dog and have been really unhappy with my department but I will be out of here by the end of this month so I have been more optimistic about that....

It does get better

ITA with this thread!

---

Posted by allornil

let me tell you a story. there once was a girl named Amy, who had a wedding i 1995 at westbury manor. Amy was VERY excited to plan this wedding until her mom hated everything she liked. Amy eventually gave in and let mom choose dress, flowers, food, photographer...everything.

on the day of her wedding, Amy was very unhappy bc nothing showed her personality.

The end.

---

this!

screw everyone, its your day and only your day! well FHs too lol

---

Posted by AdriandSteve


The only way I was able to deal with any problems my mom and I had during the wedding was to think this, 'It's a big change for her as well and although all parents want to see their children married they also know that things are never going to be the same again.' So it might just be hitting her now which is why she wants you to ask her opinion more. Is there anything about the wedding that your 'whatever about' that she can take the lead on? Even if it's something small like table numbers, place cards etc?

As for school, be careful with going back to teach health and gym. That's one of the HARDEST jobs to get on LI cuz each school only needs 1-4 teachers. I feel you though with the school prob. I have my MA and going back for my 2nd cuz my 1st was pointless.

Try to take each day as it comes and not look too too far ahead. (sounds stupid I know)

---

this too!
i thought about going to school to teach health for a long time but when I found out there are like no jobs out there, I gave up on the dream...most health teachers stay in their position until they retire

teaching is a great field but maybe pick something with more opportunity...sorry, i hope i didnt upset you more, just trying to help

---

Posted by LoveyDovey

---

Posted by AdriandSteve


The only way I was able to deal with any problems my mom and I had during the wedding was to think this, 'It's a big change for her as well and although all parents want to see their children married they also know that things are never going to be the same again.' So it might just be hitting her now which is why she wants you to ask her opinion more. Is there anything about the wedding that your 'whatever about' that she can take the lead on? Even if it's something small like table numbers, place cards etc?

As for school, be careful with going back to teach health and gym. That's one of the HARDEST jobs to get on LI cuz each school only needs 1-4 teachers. I feel you though with the school prob. I have my MA and going back for my 2nd cuz my 1st was pointless.

Try to take each day as it comes and not look too too far ahead. (sounds stupid I know)

---

this too!
i thought about going to school to teach health for a long time but when I found out there are like no jobs out there, I gave up on the dream...most health teachers stay in their position until they retire

teaching is a great field but maybe pick something with more opportunity...sorry, i hope i didnt upset you more, just trying to help

---

I am only going back to teach that specifically because FH is big in our school district and knows many people on the board..etc. The district has two health/phys ed teachers leaving in a 1-2 years. Its kinda a sure thing...otherwise I wouldn't be doing it. (I know nothing is ever really a sure thing..but I have to run with it). And my masters will be free bc FH works for the college.

Hey girl...whoa!

okay, breathe!!!


this is supposed to be the happiest of your times and it's not fair that people are making it more difficult for you. you should def. get that point across when you talk to people. You should be entitiled to what YOU want for this wedding. You're getting married. (trust me i know what it's like to have that want to please everyone) I know EXACTLY how you feel. You have to start learning to please yourself or you will be miserable. You have done so much for your wedding already, this is something to be proud of. Heck, I don't know you and I'm proud of you! hehe. Take a breather, go for a walk (with a coat on cuz its chilly lol) and just forget everyone. treat yourself to a many/pedi or whatever soothes you.

Also, remember that weddings are stressful on everyone that is involved. So sometimes people say or do things they might not necessarily mean. Things will boil over with mom because they have to. she's your mom! lol don't take things to heart and just plan the wedding the way you see fit. if someone says something again, mention how this is your wedding and this is how you want it and you'd appreciate encouragment and support.

okay and about school...I know exactly what you're going thru. If you really want to go back to school, then go for it girl! 2 masters is wonderful! but if you don't...have you exhausted all your options? what did you major in? maybe i can help! hehe don't stress things too much. just be happy for this huge part of your life! ok? now go get a drink! lol

I do feel that sometimes. My mom, my sister and I are all so different.

My mom usually just says 'do whatever you want.' Then when I do I get 'oh, thats....nice.'

My sister is completely awesome and helpful but so freakin' opinionated. It's helpful to have her around but I'm more laid back so it's hard for me to really stand up for myself.

Of course when I get upset - I'm being sensitive.

Just do what you want. You have your own vision. Sometimes you give on the little things but make sure the big things are what you want.

thanks ladies for helping me through this. You are all so supportive and I do not know any of you outside of LIW..I thank you all so much for that.

I went and spoke to my boss just a little while ago and he is promoting me to a higher position (with higher pay). He actually wanted to speak to me about it but didn't want to keep me away from pursuing a job in my field. So I am feeling little better. One problem is settled.