Do you invite??

I had a best friend in Jr HS and through HS... We were inseparable... Through our HS years she started to go out with my brother they fell in love.. When we both went to college she was still going out with my brother but was interested in my cousin... She began to go out with my cousin while she was still going out with my brother... When I found out I was very upset and thought that my brother should know... Of course I told my brother, he went crazy. My cousin and my friend stop talking to me, since it was my fault that my brother found out.. Years went by, my brother got married and has 2 kids.. Three months ago my brother finally forgave my cousin and my friend, but when they see me the only one that says hi to me is my cousin... She still doesn't say hello...
Now the question is... With the wedding coming up, I am inviting my cousin (since he's family), do I have to put guest on their invitation or just put his name??? Keep in mind that I don't know where they live and only 4 months ago the entire family found out that they've been together this whole time. What would you do?

---

Posted by jes81276

Oooooh, sticky situation. I am really not sure the 'right' way to handle this, but I really think that if you don't put 'and guest' he most likely won't come to the wedding. Will that bother you?

---

I want him to come to my wedding since we grew up together... Even though he stop talking to me for a few years, he's still family... I just don't want her to come... I'm so confused...

OMG! I am actually marrying my best friend's brother. When we first started to date, me and BF had a talk just to ensure her that I wouldn't screw her br0ther or anything (cause that would mess with the friendship). Obviously I didn't , but what a bad friend yours was!

I would probably just suck it up and put 'plus guest'. She is obviously not a winner, but I would do it just so your cousin would come (plus it sounds like they have been going out for a while). Did you ask your brother if he would mind if she came also?

---

Posted by SuzBride

OMG! I am actually marrying my best friend's brother. When we first started to date, me and BF had a talk just to ensure her that I wouldn't screw her br0ther or anything (cause that would mess with the friendship). Obviously I didn't , but what a bad friend yours was!

I would probably just suck it up and put 'plus guest'. She is obviously not a winner, but I would do it just so your cousin would come (plus it sounds like they have been going out for a while). Did you ask your brother if he would mind if she came also?

---

They have been going out for a few years, it was suppose to be a secret..
My brother doesn't mind, He's happily married..

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Posted by mtdr1106

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Oh yes! She's the the type of person that would show up... I really don't want to see her at my party.. The way I see it, its a celebration with family and friends... She's not family and she is not my friend... I've seen her around the way and she never looks my way... Just want to add that we were college roomates. She made my life a living hell, since she didn't want me to find out about my cousin... AWW Just thinking about this whole situation gets me mad...

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by mtdr1106

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Oh yes! She's the the type of person that would show up... I really don't want to see her at my party.. The way I see it, its a celebration with family and friends... She's not family and she is not my friend... I've seen her around the way and she never looks my way... Just want to add that we were college roomates. She made my life a living hell, since she didn't want me to find out about my cousin... AWW Just thinking about this whole situation gets me mad...

---

Not to sound like too much of a bridezilla but I say you have every right to invite your cousin WITHOUT a guest. As you said, she's NOT family and she's not a FRIEND. If you cousin cannot understand where you are coming from, that's too bad. This is your day and you need to be happy. I have no doubt this wedding is costing a pretty penny. Do you want to spend that money on feeding her???

Good luck!

---

Posted by Jennie0898

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by mtdr1106

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Oh yes! She's the the type of person that would show up... I really don't want to see her at my party.. The way I see it, its a celebration with family and friends... She's not family and she is not my friend... I've seen her around the way and she never looks my way... Just want to add that we were college roomates. She made my life a living hell, since she didn't want me to find out about my cousin... AWW Just thinking about this whole situation gets me mad...

---

Not to sound like too much of a bridezilla but I say you have every right to invite your cousin WITHOUT a guest. As you said, she's NOT family and she's not a FRIEND. If you cousin cannot understand where you are coming from, that's too bad. This is your day and you need to be happy. I have no doubt this wedding is costing a pretty penny. Do you want to spend that money on feeding her???

Good luck!

---

my thoughts exactly!!!

---

Posted by Jennie0898

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by mtdr1106

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Oh yes! She's the the type of person that would show up... I really don't want to see her at my party.. The way I see it, its a celebration with family and friends... She's not family and she is not my friend... I've seen her around the way and she never looks my way... Just want to add that we were college roomates. She made my life a living hell, since she didn't want me to find out about my cousin... AWW Just thinking about this whole situation gets me mad...

---

Not to sound like too much of a bridezilla but I say you have every right to invite your cousin WITHOUT a guest. As you said, she's NOT family and she's not a FRIEND. If you cousin cannot understand where you are coming from, that's too bad. This is your day and you need to be happy. I have no doubt this wedding is costing a pretty penny. Do you want to spend that money on feeding her???

Good luck!

---

Lol I don't want to spend any money on her and if she's there that would mean I have to say hi, which I don't want...

If they are living together she should probably be invited. Although, if she doesn't even say hello to you, she might not want to come to your wedding.

Good luck!

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by Jennie0898

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by mtdr1106

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Oh yes! She's the the type of person that would show up... I really don't want to see her at my party.. The way I see it, its a celebration with family and friends... She's not family and she is not my friend... I've seen her around the way and she never looks my way... Just want to add that we were college roomates. She made my life a living hell, since she didn't want me to find out about my cousin... AWW Just thinking about this whole situation gets me mad...

---

Not to sound like too much of a bridezilla but I say you have every right to invite your cousin WITHOUT a guest. As you said, she's NOT family and she's not a FRIEND. If you cousin cannot understand where you are coming from, that's too bad. This is your day and you need to be happy. I have no doubt this wedding is costing a pretty penny. Do you want to spend that money on feeding her???

Good luck!

---

Lol I don't want to spend any money on her and if she's there that would mean I have to say hi, which I don't want...

---

OMG - I am so glad that you guys all understand me!!! I feel like my family thinks i just like to be difficult - but truth is - to me it simply does not make sense to invite someone you don't like!!

---

Posted by mtdr1106

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by Jennie0898

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by mtdr1106

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Oh yes! She's the the type of person that would show up... I really don't want to see her at my party.. The way I see it, its a celebration with family and friends... She's not family and she is not my friend... I've seen her around the way and she never looks my way... Just want to add that we were college roomates. She made my life a living hell, since she didn't want me to find out about my cousin... AWW Just thinking about this whole situation gets me mad...

---

Not to sound like too much of a bridezilla but I say you have every right to invite your cousin WITHOUT a guest. As you said, she's NOT family and she's not a FRIEND. If you cousin cannot understand where you are coming from, that's too bad. This is your day and you need to be happy. I have no doubt this wedding is costing a pretty penny. Do you want to spend that money on feeding her???

Good luck!

---

Lol I don't want to spend any money on her and if she's there that would mean I have to say hi, which I don't want...

---

OMG - I am so glad that you guys all understand me!!! I feel like my family thinks i just like to be difficult - but truth is - to me it simply does not make sense to invite someone you don't like!!

---

AMEN SISTA!!!

---

Posted by Jennie0898

---

Posted by mtdr1106

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by Jennie0898

---

Posted by foofy

---

Posted by mtdr1106

not too sticky for me - i have a similiar situation - and i am inviting my guy cousin with 'guest' - i am still hoping for a house to drop on her before my wedding so i don't want to jinx anything by actually writing her name on the invite.

also - do you think she would actually go?? i didn't think that my cousins GF would show @ my engagement party - and she did!!! and boy was i livid!!!

so to answer your question - no - i do not think you have to invite someone who you do not speak to. logically the concept is silly. i think 'guest' would be just fine.

---

Oh yes! She's the the type of person that would show up... I really don't want to see her at my party.. The way I see it, its a celebration with family and friends... She's not family and she is not my friend... I've seen her around the way and she never looks my way... Just want to add that we were college roomates. She made my life a living hell, since she didn't want me to find out about my cousin... AWW Just thinking about this whole situation gets me mad...

---

Not to sound like too much of a bridezilla but I say you have every right to invite your cousin WITHOUT a guest. As you said, she's NOT family and she's not a FRIEND. If you cousin cannot understand where you are coming from, that's too bad. This is your day and you need to be happy. I have no doubt this wedding is costing a pretty penny. Do you want to spend that money on feeding her???

Good luck!

---

Lol I don't want to spend any money on her and if she's there that would mean I have to say hi, which I don't want...

---

OMG - I am so glad that you guys all understand me!!! I feel like my family thinks i just like to be difficult - but truth is - to me it simply does not make sense to invite someone you don't like!!

---

AMEN SISTA!!!

---

my thoughts exactly...it's your wedding, why should you have to look at someone who you don't like anymore and who doesn't even say hi to you????? Do what you want and don't feel guilty about whatever decision you make!!!!!!!!!

I would just put plus guest and you know he will bring her but it will be your day dont let it (her) take that away from you

---

Posted by foofy

I'm so glad I'm not alone on this... Thanks Ladies for all your help.. I've decided its going to be no guest...

---

Good choice!!

---

Posted by foofy

I'm so glad I'm not alone on this... Thanks Ladies for all your help.. I've decided its going to be no guest...

---

i know that was not an easy decision - i hope you do not lose your nerve. good luck!

you have a while before you need to send out invites so you don't have to make a decisiong right away you never know things could get better, anything is possible.