My FI just called me and told me he spoke with his sister, who's daughter is the flower girl in our wedding. His sister told him that her daughter had her first communion dress to wear at our wedding when she is the flower girl. My FI told her that was fine and she didn't have to buy a dress. I'm kind of mad about this, b/c what if I don't like the dress? My FI said I'm being ridiculous and that he's sure the dress is cute. What do I do? I wanted her to have a dress that poofs out a little like my dress does.
Claud2001
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Re: Do you think this is right?
Is budget a problem for your FSIL? If you don't want your FG to wear her communion dress, than I think it's fair that you offer to pay for the FG dress that you choose. JMO.
MarcellaBella
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I totally understand why you would be upset.. but have you seen the dress? Perhaps you can do it this way: either tell her flat out that you would like her to have a dres similar to yours or b) if she refuses or gives you a problem, I suggestthat you go and see her and the dress and say ok, she can use the dress but onlyif she has it altered to look like yours.. when she realizes how much it would cost to do such a thing and that it would be cheaper to just get something new, I'm sure she will..
julykbride
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I'm sure that budget could be a problem. FI's Brother in Law is a groomsmen and their 2 children are in the wedding, FG and RB. We are giving the RB the free tux and the groomsmen tuxes are only $50. I gave the RB the free tux b/c I figured that they would have to buy a dress for the FG. I would pay for the dress, but now FI's family would all think that I'm being ridiculous if I bought a FG dress when they're saying that they have the communion dress already. Plus FI would be so mad to pay for a FG dress when he doesn't want to.
julykbride
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I will never be able to see the dress since they live in Illinois. I can have her send a picture though I guess. It is a very formal wedding and I don't want the FG to look like she is wearing a cheap dress.
LisaT
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I think you should have the option of picking what dress your FG will wear. As to who should pay for it, thats kind of tricky. I would think it would be the parents responsibility, but given the sticky situation, I would buy her the dress you want.
Amyd
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I'm with Claud on this one. My husband's neice was our flower girl and her parents were not in the best financial situation. I thought it was only right that I paid for the dress since I wanted her in the bridal party. JMO.
ddunne23
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Here's an idea...even if it isn't naturally poofy, go to David's Bridal and pick up a kid's crenoline. That should make everyone happy.
julykbride
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Thanks ddunne! That might help.
I just called FI and asked him if FSIL could send us a picture of the communion so I can see what the dress looks like. He said that no matter what, that is the dress she is wearing and I can't buy her a new one b/c we are already over budget.
eroxgirl
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My FH did the same thing to me...he told the best (wo)man she could wear whatever she wanted and that's really not okay with me, and as far as I'm concerned, I (as the bride) get final say. I think you should tell FH that he shouldn't have given the okay without discussing it with you first. But I also think you should check out the dress before you make the final decision on what she wears and then offer to help for part of the cost if it is a financial burden (and if you have it to give!)
minniebride14
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How can a little girl not look adorable in ANY dress? I'm sure the dress is fine and that you will like it. She's only a little girl - and maybe they can't afford a new one. Just let it go, and realize it's not even remotely a big deal. Choose your battles...
shelzyp
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I would be annoyed too, it is your wedding and she should be ina dress that you want her in. But I do understand that these situations are touchy, my niece is goignt o be the FG in our wedding and the dress I wanted her to wear didn't have sleeves, and my aunt was a bit upset about it, so I have to go with a dress that is not as cute, for two inches of fabric to cover her arm. But, what colcor dress are you wearing, it if it a different color it may look wierd.
sanmik
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If it's the issue of being a little puffy, you can add one of those slips underneath. See what the dress looks like, I know it's a little presumptuous of her to assume you would be OK with it, but those dresses are a little expensive (especially for one time use). If you have your heart set on a particular dress, maybe just offer to buy it for her.
minniebride14
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I'm sorry, but I totally disagree (which I usually don't). As I said, it's not a big deal at all. She's a kid, for God's sake; she will look cute no matter what. Don't put pressure on a little kid - or her mother. Focus on YOUR dress and your poof. You're really making a mountain out of a molehill. Enjoy the day for what it is - your day - with your dress. You'll be beautiful, and everything else will be fine.
Fran M
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The FG and RB will be cute no matter what they wear. I had 4 FG's each in a different white dress and no one noticed. I cann tell you from experience after they walk in and get all the oww and ahh's everyone forgets about them and concentrates on YOU! So dont give it another thought.
minniebride14
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Agreed!!
ddunne23
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Plus even if it is plain, you can make it match your color scheme easliy, by adding a really pretty double faced satin ribbon tied around her waster into a bow. No one will even know it is not an official flower girl dress! It will be fine!
yes, I agree kids look cute in anything you put them in...but I know I would want to pick the dress out....we paid for our FG dress...
it sounds like SIL was trying to be helpful, but
its your day and you should get what you want...as for going over budget...you can shave off a little here and there...but IMO whats another $100??
tell FH that you'll bring your lunch...you'll get a manicure every other week...what ever it is...If you are willing to give that stuff up for the perfect FG dress...I say go for it...
but this is JMHO
regina2
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I agree. My sister-in-Law and her two children are apart of the wedding. The two kids will be rin bearer and Flower Girl. It gets expensive, children's outfits are not cheap.
I'm sure the white communion dress will not be hideous. Just add a matching ribbon around her waist to make it more uniform. If you get upset about every little detail, your going to make yourself crazy and everyone else around you as well. Dont sweat the little things!!
