Drug Abuse

Any suggestions how to get someone help that doesn't know how BAD THEY NEED IT!

I am in a situation like this. It is really hard to talk to some one about this subject. It really depend s on who they are to you. In my case it was a family member that I spoke to on a regular basis. It wasn't easy to talk about and it didn't really work at first, but you really just have to be supportive and try to let them know you are not going to judge them if they slip up. It is soo hard and I really feel for you.

They think bc its a weekend thing its not a problem but it is!

Theresa, thats very caring of you to want to get help for this person.
Unfortunately they have to want to get help themselves.
We've tried it with my dad and smoking (he had triple bypass at 69 yrs old and puffing away 2 wks later ).
We used so many lines 'your own health, see your grandchildren grow up, we love you' etc etc.
If THEY dont see it as a problem, its really hard to even speak to them about it.
It got to the point where he would YELL at us, tell us we are brainwashed (stubborn Italian man ), and that air pollution is worse than cigarette smoke, and not to bother him about it again....
We still do make comments, but it really bothers him. He wont smoke around our children or in our homes, but he will still find his time and place to puff away..
They say the someone has to hit rockbottom and realize on their own. Sad but they have to learn the hard way... I hope theres a way you can get through to this person. Maybe theyre not as stubborn as my dad, and will listen to you.

Good luck

Unfortunatly I have too much experience in this situation and the bottom line is that they have to want it otherwise it means NOTHING, it's so sad wen you watch a loved one self distruct..you can mention it to this person, give this person contact information on staying clean but ufortunately sweetie it's up to them. You are a good person and I can tell how much you care.

T-
I was concerned at one point about a close family member that I thought was on his/her way to a problem. As someone who was close to that person, I basically said 'I'm on to you. There is no such thing as recreational drug use, and it needs to stop. Period. It's ridiculous, it's hurtful, and it's expensive. Get a better hobby, but cut the crap or we're gonna go to war.' Luckily with this individual it worked - I don't think this person was really an addict or truly wanted to continue doing it - but it worked this time.

On the flip side, another family member has been an addict for 15 years, in and out of jail for several of those years, and has begun to withdraw from us yet again - a sure sign he/she is back on the crap. When we try to talk to him/her about it, he/she goes away. Next time we hear from him/her, he/she's in jail again.

I'd say have a serious talk with you weekend-using friend - and gently remind this person that no one starts out an addict - they evolve from recreational users. And if you feel that strongly about it, cut yourself off from this person and refuse to have anything to do with them unless they stop. They think they aren't hurting anyone but themselves but it is simply not true. Take it from someone who knows.

Unless they go for, or want help themselves, there's nothing you can do.
Good Luck though

Thanks girls..


The PROBLEM is they will there is no problem.
If we chose to do cocaine on the weekend that is our business and that isn't a problem!

Sounds like Bobby Brown if you ask me, no pun intended, but it is staring them straight in the face, but like all the other ladies have said, they have to admit it to themselves, there is nothing you can do. I don't steal every day, I only steal on the weekends, hello??? you are a theif. I hope something positive happens for this person before its too late

So sorry you're experiencing this. A dear friend of mine got very into drugs, and even though she's supposedly 'off' them now, she is a changed person. That crap really screws up your brain and it changes people.

You can talk to this person until you're blue in the face, but unless they hit rock bottom and want to change, there is nothing you can do. Most people who do this are doing it because they LIKE it, they like the feeling they get from it, and the social experiences they have with their druggie friends. In order to change, they have to change their whole LIFESTYLE, their whole circle of friends, and a lot of people are just not willing or ready to do that. They don't see that there's anything WRONG, so what is there to change? It's very frustrating for the people who love them.

It's very hard to sit back and feel helpless while someone you love is self-destructing. Unfortunately, short of an intervention, there is nothing you can do alone for this person. An intervention, on the other hand, may be an option.

Maybe you can speak to a drug counselor or something and ask about this? I think things have to be pretty bad before they will do an intervention, though.

Best of luck to you.

Karen M

I was going to recommend an intervention also.
Just talking to them will not help, especially if they don't think they have a problem.

So many people think they can handle it or stop when they want to. But that's not always the case.

Someone very close to me had a drinking problem he thought he could handle at first.
When that didn't work went to AA,
then rehab,
then back to drinking,
then lost their job,
then got thrown out of their house and served with divorce papers,
then drank some more,
then a stricter longer rehab,
then back to drinking and is now dead. He was 33.

He started as a recreational drinker and it got out of hand before he realized it and then it was too late for him to stop on his own and even with the help of others.


Best of luck to you and your friends.

Holy cow Christine! What an awful story! I'm so sorry!

T - sorry to hear you are going through this with someone....

Christine - what a horrible story....but one that really makes you think....

Thirilled - Thanks

Sage - that's why I wrote it like that. It was so tragic and senseless and that it can happen to anyone, young or old.