we're having a casual but fairly large (75 people) engagement party on sept. 22. do i need to know who we'll ask to be in the wedding party by that point? we're not getting married until summer of '09, and i'd still like to play it by ear for awhile with certain people.
also, what's the deal with gifts? i've heard so many things: register, don't register, register just in case but don't put it on the invite, people will give money, a lot of people won't give gifts, etc, etc. a friend of mine got about 16 wedding frames, something i hope to avoid.
are there other important but not so obvious things i should know, clueless as i am?
luna bride x
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Member since
Re: e-party etiquette
at our e-party i didn't ask anyone to be in the bridal party. our e-party was in april of 06 and i still haven't asked anyone yet lol so if it's a long engagement i would say it's fine not to..
as for the gifts.. we only registered at bed bath and beyond.. whatever people didn't get us off the registry they just gave gift cards. i got like 90% gift cards (to target, bbb and lnt).. i think one person gave us cash.
hth!
GinaZ
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Re: e-party etiquette
Id say dont ask them yet if you think you need more time. There is no rush!
As for gifts- I'd say register and if someone wants to buy from a registry they will ask if you have one. No need to put a bajillion things on it yet. but people will appreciate the option of buying from one.
tlp123
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Re: e-party etiquette
We registered for our engagement party. People kept asking us where we were registered. I was hoping for cash, but since people wanted to buy us gifts, I was told to register b/c otherwise you will end up with stuff you don't want.
If I am not mistaken, etiquette dictates that guests are not obligated to buy gifts for an engagement party, so you aren't supposed to put your registry information on the invitation. However, some of my friends are baffled as to why I didn't put the registry info on the invitations. Oh well, I guess you can't win everything. :)
Good luck.
cindyandkevin
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Re: e-party etiquette
You don't have to have your BP picked out yet. People might ask you who's in it tho, and you can simply answer 'We don't know yet, we're so overwhelmed we haven't even thought about it yet'.
As for registering, you can get started since you'll need to do it anyway for your shower. Just don't put it on the invitations!! People who want to buy you a gift (rather than give you $$) will ask you or your parents where you're registered, so just let it travel by word of mouth.
HTH!!
Saram
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Re: e-party etiquette
i didnt register...i figured if i registered for the engagement party what was i gonna get at my shower...most people give money so i wouldnt worry...i had about 85 people and i got 3 gifts..
KSquared
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Re: e-party etiquette
You don't have to ask the bridal party yet if you havent decided - or if you just dont want to. You have some time.
As far as gifts, people had asked where we were registed and we just said (or my parents said) that we hadn't registed yet because we don't know where we will be living and it's so far away that we weren't ready to pick things out yet and that we'd have no where to store them for a year - which is all true..
So we got mostly money - a few gifts, but most people got the hint that we didnt want a lot of stuff right now.
jeanne08
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Re: e-party etiquette
We didn't have e-party but we still began our registry about 3 months after we got engaged b/c our parent s friends wanted to get us stufff so we started w/ some kitchen basics. I've added on since and will be adding more later.
As for you BP- don't rush into it. Sit down and really think about how many people you want and who you want.
SOTHISISLOVE53109
Posted:
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Re: e-party etiquette
I hadn't asked my bridal party yet at the time of my engagement party...and im so glad i didnt because some people that i would have asked at that time are no longer in my life...so I would def. say to wait.
Also alot of people asked me if I registered...I feel that the engagement party is to get $...the bridal shower is for your gifts....because if they get your everything now what it left for the shower? jmo
Good Luck!
PegaLega
Posted:
Member since
Re: e-party etiquette
I had a 2 1/2 year engagement and jumped the gun on asking people to be in my BP. Your wedding is more then a year away i would wait. Either you will be lucky and those you want to ask with be helpful or youll find out who could care less. I had to ask people to step out and that stunk big time. I would wait. Your e-party is really about celebrating your engagement, so enjoy it!
little34
Posted:
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Re: e-party etiquette
I already asked my girls to be in the wedding and I think FH is going to ask at the e-party (next Sunday...it came so quick).... as far as registering goes...we did. I have been to so many e-parties where there were a lot of gifts so I wanted to give my guests the option of money or gift...we also live together and we have ALOT of stuff so I wanted to avoid people giving us things we dont need.
