so i was just on the BHB board and was reading the thread about E-rings so i was just curious what you girls take on the significance of e-rings.
heres mine: if he askes and she says yes they are engaged. i hate that the public views engagement as ring=engaged. i dont wear my ring to work since i am afarid to loose the diamond at work. and when i say to a patient or coworker that im engaged they automatically say...'wheres the ring' , 'how big is it', 'what does it look like' and i almost always want to say.. what if i didnt have one? i just think its a symbol of the engagement but i would be just as happy with out it. i also hate how people associate big diamonds means your FI loves you more. ok im done now!
kimNanthony
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Re: E-rings??
Yea I completely agree with you. Before I got engaged I was set on a 2 carat ring and once we started talking more seriously about getting engaged I realized that I would never want him to spend that much on a ring. He also couldn't afford it and I would have had to wait years. I think sometimes people get caught up in the size of the diamond and forget what is really important. To me it was more important to marry him than to have a huge ring. I still got a nice one though
angl2001
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Re: E-rings??
i agree i told FH i didnt need one! but he insisted
a few girls i know have HUGE rings and when they saw mine they had a weird sound in their voice . they said its nice but meant 'its small' lol i told him if he was gonna get one i wanted small and simple. and thats what i got. 1/2 kt princess cut 1 stone. as long as the love is there thats all that matters!
Soon2BMrsD
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Re: E-rings??
of course i always dreamed of that huge 2 ct ring but the fact that we were 20 when we got engaged and fh had never worked a day in his life he made apromise to me in HS that if we made it though him being away at college then we would get engaged since wed be able to make it though anything. so as soon as he graduated he got a job working at applebees just to buy me a ring he worked his hinnie off 12 hour days the fact that he put his blood sweat and tears into earning the money just so he could say he bought it... i know its not a huge ring but i love that he put so much thought and time into picking it out and working for it.. thats what matters to me. we were 20 i wasnt expecting anything to be honest! i didnt even know it was coming. we had talked about it but i didnt think it would be any time soon!
Jesses Girl
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Re: E-rings??
i totally agree...
i mean i love my ring with all my heart but FH doesnt need to tell me he loves me in carats...
it was expensive and he shouldnt have spent a lot on it but i know what you mean...
what about random people who you dont kno that ask...
'so wheres the wedding whens the date lalala' bc they see me and then see the ring..
its like ok?! hi my name is ___ haha u kno?
tara08
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Re: E-rings??
I don't wear my e-ring to work either... does that mean im not engaged because its sitting in a box at home?? It makes me so mad when people get caught up in material things... everyone has different situations in life and if you couldnt afford an ering and you are making wedding plans or have made a conscious decision to start making wedding plans it doesnt make you any less engaged but thats just my opinion.
Mrs. V 2008
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Re: E-rings??
I hear you! and I actually feel the same way..the ring means nothing..the fact that he asked is more important to me...What really annoys me is when i don't wear it for one day, or i forget to put it on..people automatically assume the engagement was broken off...its so annoying
Collweenie21
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Re: E-rings??
OK... I agree you don't have to have a ring to be engaged.
However, I was with FH a loooonnnngggg time before he proposed. And I let him know that in order to have me for the rest of his life, he was gonna have to pay up!!! LOL. But I also knew his financial situation as well. If he was just getting out of college, or didn't find his footing yet, I wouldn't have been this way, I just want to be with him.
Mrs. V 2008
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Re: E-rings??
and i too begged him for a 3 carat ring for months before he actually bought it, and now i actually feel selfish for ever thinking of it that way...I didn't get 3 carats, but now i realize what engagement is really about and the fact that he worked his butt of and picked out something he knew i would like..means more! Its the size of the heart not the diamond that matters!!
Espo22
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Re: E-rings??
you dont need a ring to be engaged...If you two are serious and are definitely going to plan a wedding and both have made that commitment and are on track then that is all you need...An engagement is about the promise and commitment you both made to eachother, its not about a ring, yes its a symbol to show you are engaged, but lets be serious-is the ring what really matters-no its the commitment you both made to eachother.
BUT i saw the thread so i know what youre talking about...Like i said in there, if they both are serious and he really wants to marry her then she doesn't need the ring...But there are girls out there who will talk to their bf's about marriage more in the sense of, do you think you would ever want to marry me, and oh it'd be nice to do this for our wedding and that and the guy just yes her to death just to shut her up then that is different. I dont know that couples situation so can't say what their status is. If he also believes they're engaged then yes they are...If she is the one who believes they are engaged just bc of talk of marriage then no
failurebydsign
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Re: E-rings??
like me..i dont have one..but that didnt stop me from getting things done..i knew we were going to get married..so i didnt feel the need to wait for a stupid ring..if i get one..then great..but i do feel weird calling him my fiance since he didnt formally ask me..i still call him my boyfriend...everyone yells at me when i say it
Soon2BMrsD
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Re: E-rings??
Posted by failurebydsign
like me..i dont have one..but that didnt stop me from getting things done..i knew we were going to get married..so i didnt feel the need to wait for a stupid ring..if i get one..then great..but i do feel weird calling him my fiance since he didnt formally ask me..i still call him my boyfriend...everyone yells at me when i say it
you do what makes your comfy.. does he know that you want him to ask?
Autumn08
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Re: E-rings??
I completely understand that when someone is engaged we all ask 'where's the ring?' I was a little upset reading the emphasis that was put on it. Saying that a couple can't be engaged with out a ring. My mother never had an engagement ring and they will be happily married 30 years this july. My 'dissappointed' post seemed to stir up some trouble but I stand by what I said. I do find it dissappointing that so many people feel you are not truly engaged unless you have a ring. FH proposed 2/14/06 and until we actually started looking at places and set a date I didn't feel engaged.
failurebydsign
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Re: E-rings??
ive been asked casually..and he knows i would love a ring..but even if i had one..i didnt even feel like it was really happening until i booked CLM..that was like the start for me..like..ok were really getting married..like for real on this date i will be married..
