engagement party

KathysMOH Posted: Dec 01, 2003 10:16 PM

engagement party

I have never been to one. Hubby and I are going to one saturday night at a nice restaurant, the couple is not registered.....what is an appropriate gift? How much should we spend? It is a good friend of Hubbies.....

franksbride Posted: Dec 01, 2003 10:21 PM

Re: engagement party

$100...

franksbride Posted: Dec 01, 2003 10:21 PM

Re: engagement party

Or whatever you feel comfortable spending...

halloweenbride04 Posted: Dec 01, 2003 10:22 PM

Re: engagement party

If it's a good friend or family I usually give $$. But I always use a Lenox vase or Mikasa frame as my 'safety' gifts.

Rob-luvs-me Posted: Dec 01, 2003 10:40 PM

Re: engagement party

$100 is very generous!

We were registered so we got some stuff off our registry - (places settings, wine rack etc)

but many gifts did not come from our registry - we got candlesticks from tiffany's, waterford and tiffany vases.

Friends of ours have gotten - their toasting flutes, serving pieces as gifts -

Any couple could always use a nice gift cert to say fortunoffs - with a note to get anything they needed but didn't receive. That is always a nice present then you don't have to worry if they already have it or need it.

LIPrincess00 Posted: Dec 01, 2003 10:46 PM

Re: engagement party

What about an American Express gift check in something. I have rec's them in vases, candy dishes, etc. Just something little.

KathysMOH Posted: Dec 01, 2003 11:16 PM

Re: engagement party

Thanks so much for the info. I like the idea of the gift card/or check in something. Shows you thought of them but decided to give a little extra.....

Kra5hnburn Posted: Dec 02, 2003 07:34 AM

Re: engagement party

We just had our engagement party in October and good friends of ours had theirs in November. Since niether of us were registered, we asked for money or gift certificates to Bed, Bath & Beyond, Macys, Fortunoffs, etc. But some people just didn't want to listen to us and gave actual gifts. In comparing with the other bride, we got a lot of items (frames, vases...) that we did not want. I understand people think of these as general gifts, but everyone's taste is very different, and a lot of these gifts will never come out of the attic. Go with the gift card or money. It'll make life so much easier on the couple

Nora101004 Posted: Dec 02, 2003 01:12 PM

Re: engagement party

Kra5hnburn: Be careful with the gift cards, some of the have fees if they aren't used in a certain period of time, check the backs of each card.

JimmysBride Posted: Dec 02, 2003 01:32 PM

Re: engagement party

Definitely cash! That's all I wanted for my E-party. A gift card is good too. But cash for the wedding is better, IMO!

jenny2penny Posted: Dec 02, 2003 01:43 PM

Re: engagement party

Anything I think is appropriate for an e-party since gifts are not required (JMO)
We got gifts anywhere from $20 +.....$1,000

things we registerd for and things we could use anyway.

larryswife2be Posted: Dec 02, 2003 02:21 PM

Re: engagement party

Our engagement party was in August, and we were very appreciative of $$$$!!!

sweetnessconfused Posted: Dec 02, 2003 03:18 PM

Re: engagement party

GIVE $$$$$$$! Our e-pary was this weekend and I really appreciated the $$$ given we are paying for this on our own. Also if the place is nice & its a good friend give a nice amount. I know you can't expect ppl to cover their plates but some ppl are so CHEAP! Ours was at Russo's on the Bay and ppl rave about how much food. (they literally were like scavengers at dessert time) and then we received gifts like $50 for 2 ppl or a crap crystal dish. Just my opinion.

Kra5hnburn Posted: Dec 02, 2003 04:01 PM

Re: engagement party

I usually give money for these kinds of things...I'm surprised about the gift card deal. Thanks for the heads up! I know that your really not supposed to bring a gift to an e-party, but you know people will anyway. I just think cash is always the best gift when there's no registry.

Nessa79 Posted: Dec 02, 2003 05:29 PM

Re: engagement party

Well the rules of etiquette for an e party is no gifts required for ours we were very adamite (sp.) about no gifts. But we were given very thoughtful gifts, and honestly I loved all the cute little wedding things we recieved, toasting glasses, pic frames, crystal stuff, and vases i appreciated that more than cash. Ans we are paying for our wedding for ourselves too, they are meant to have a good time and celebrate the engagement, you later will give plenty of cash at the wedding, plus a nice gift at the shower too!!! Do what you want there are no rules for gifts at an e party people who hold them expecting to get lots of mobney are greedy

Rob-luvs-me Posted: Dec 02, 2003 05:58 PM

Re: engagement party

I do agree with that the idea that most people do want/need money or gift certs- but you have to keep in mind that for some people - 1) they consider it rude to be told to give money or gift cards or 2) some people are simply NOT comfortable with giving monetary gifts instead of a tangible gift (they might be happy to spend 300-400$ on a gift but the idea of giving a gift card so the couple knows what was spent is uncomfortable to them.

Although giving money in NY is quite the norm the last e-party I went to the couple didn't register and people were commenting on that they felt that the couple was asking for a hand out - each to his own.

Vicky1706 Posted: Dec 02, 2003 07:59 PM

Re: engagement party

As tacky as it sounds...one of the main reasons we had our engagement party was to make some cash to help pay for the wedding. Cash is always great but his aunt & uncle gave us Tiffany champagne flutes that are beautiful. I love them so much I am going to have them engraved and used as the toasting glasses for our wedding. We also bought them for friends of ours and they were about $70. More of a thoughtful gift than cash but equally valuable to me! Good luck! tiffany champagne flutes