Engagement Party???

Can someone tell me how much does the engagement party have to do with the actual wedding?? Let me tell you guys what happened...... My FH and I are indecisive due to finance issues because I'm still in school about the wedding date. So we were thinking about pushing the wedding back to 2012. His mother is nicely throwing us an engagement party this May with the help of my family. So, I expressed to her our concern and the 2012 date and she tells me 'If you guys knew you weren't gonna have the wedding in 2011, we should've never had the engagement party this early'....... I also expressed to her that, what if we went to City Hall and had a nice big celebration thereafter with family and friends (this was just an option; not something I plan on doing), she then says to me 'Well if you guys wanted to go to City Hall, then we should've never had an engagement party at all' Her reasoning for this is because people at the engagement party are gonna expect a wedding date soon and expect to attend a wedding. And she also says that there is some rule, that if you got City Hall, you should not have an engagement party....

She's making me feel really bad for wanting to have the wedding in 2012 as opposed to 2011...

Ladies, advice pleaseee!!

Here's what I was told when it came to engagement parties:

If your wedding is more than a year away it is perfectly acceptable to have one, and it should be fairly soon after your engagement (so mine...we were engaged in Aug. and party was in Nov.). If your wedding is going to be a year away do it right after you get engaged. Any less than a year it's typically taboo to have a party as it looks like a bid for more gifts.

So that being said, I see nothing wrong with having a party now, regardless of a 2011 or 2012 wedding. Go, have your party, enjoy your party, and worry about the date later

yea no way! I went to one 2 years before the wedding and I would have had one already which was 2 years before ours if we could have afforded it since no one is throwing one for us lol..but yes it's definitely fine to have it now

ITA with the girls that say as long as its a year before the wedding or longer its fine

Both my cousins had 2 1/2 yr engagements and had their e-parties within 6 months of getting engaged

If anything it's probably better this way, because then no one willhave any issues about going to another party for you and giving another gift because it's so far apart.. Sadly enough I have heard people complain about having to give a gift at an engagement party then give again at a wedding soon after........

Dont feel bad! FH's mom shouldnt throw it in your face that she is throwing an engagement party for you guys and you're not getting amrried until 2012! What she should have done was 1) check with you guys or 2) used the money that she is goingt o spend on the engagement party and use it towards your wedding!

Like someone said earlier, if we had the money, we would have thrown an engagement party but we rather spend the money on the wedding instead! The engagement party is just a way to celebrate your engagement with friends and family :)