I was complaining about $$$ issues... so I called my mom, my fiance and FMIL.. lol.. I really was flipping, because now that I have this wedding and how I want it in my head.. I WANT IT!!! We're not broke, but it just seems like it is so much $$$ to spend for one day.. My FMIL said that she will pay for everyone she invites, and my mom said the same for herself.. so that helps out SO MUCH!!!!! Basically all of FI and I friends are in the wedding party.. so anyway.. I went through my bills and consolidated, and it isn't that bad.. Not compared to what I thougth it was, and my grandmothers husband is a prof. photographer and as a wedding gift he wants to do our pictures for FREE!!! we'll pay for the film.. that's it.. can't beat that.. I am so much happier and calmer now.. but we still do have to save up money.. but we can do it.. thanks girls for all your help!!! This does mean that I may not be able to have my dream centerpieces, but oh well, I'll have my dream hubby!!!!
dolphin
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
well would you really be calling off the wedding? or would you just postpone it a year so that you could save these are two very different terms. You can look into money saving tips but these only save a little money. figuring out how much time you need and postponing would be an option.
neesiepie
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
CONSOLIDATE all your DEBT! I did it in 2 yrs. After today, I have 1 payment left out of $10k worth of debt....open a joint account, put in a set amount each pay period NO MATTER WHAT.....don't get a LOAN.....figure out how much your monthly payments are. Get rid of as many credit cards as you can (i couldnt, since ALL mine charged off and I was being sued by everyone and their grandmother) Consolidating eliminates finance charges and extra fees...so all you pay is the monthly payment of all your debt combined..... then you set a budget and figure out how much can come out of your paycheck each pay period. YOU CAN DO IT IF I DID!
JZNCK
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
I have a year and 3 months til the wedding. .My debt is under $10,000 it's just that my fiance and I had a fight this morning, and he had to pay off a debt of mine, and I felt bad, because I am trying to have this huge wedding.. but I am loooking at is as it's a year a way.. I have time.. I am going to consolidate, your RIGHT!!!! Thanks for the inspirations neesipie!!!!
ETS: we already have our hall, scheduled, and now I owe $4,000 in january, that's what I'm freaking out about.. UGGHHH!!!!
drewsgirl
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
It is overwhelming for everyone - don't let it get to you. I can't tell you how many times I freaked out in the past but now that it is getting closer I am not getting too worried. Everything has a way of working itself out.
btrflygrl
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
Sweety...We are in the same boat...I acquired major debt, FH acquired major debt, I moved out of my parents' home way too early....money is so tight. FH already has a car loan, I have student loans.....but we're making it happen. We are keeping a tight budget and thinking about what is important to us for our wedding day. I moved into FH parents' house to save $650 in rent. We don't eat out anymore. His parents refinanced the house for our wedding, my father took on a risky business venture....all for our wedding. I work at night too. You just have to analyze what's important....fancy flowers and favors don't mean much to us...but having 150 of our closest friends and family do mean something. I wish you all the luck in the world, and if you need a shoulder...feel free to FM me
Sage10.03
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
DO NOT get a loan or use credit cards....
I know you want this wedding, but you have to look at things long term. Having a lot of debt is going to put a serious strain on your marriage.... The last thing you want is to look at your wedding as the reason you are both still in debt.
There is no reason why you have to call it off....why not postpone it until you are paid off? or just have a very intimate ceremony for you both and your parents?
Good Luck!!!
KarenB
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
Plan something you can afford w/out having to save every dime. What matters is your love & your life together. Go with something more reasonable, scale down, etc.
Good luck.
Karen
neesiepie
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
Maybe you can talk to whoever it is you owe $4k to....tell them about the situation? Just an idea to buy you more time.....
RedHead
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
*** GLAD TO HEAR THINGS ARE WORKING OUT FOR YOU! I EDITED MY POST SINCE IT DOESN'T APPLY.
steph4777
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
Remember the wedding reception is just one day! You should be more concerned with the marriage. I know we all what the wedding of our dreams but that one day is not worth going into more debt.
If you can't afford what you are currently planning, maybe you should scale it down a bit. Invite less people, do an afternoon wedding, cut back on flowers, etc....
If you are dead set on having everything, get a second job (if possible) or push the wedding date back to save more money.
OctBride05
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
this is the reason i am having a 3 and a half year engagement. i did not want to go in to debt for a one day celebration. i am only having around 60-65 people at my wedding and i am paying it all in cash, i am not taking out loans or paying with credit cards.
August2004
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
I would def not go into debt over my wedding day. I would say to either postpone the wedding or scale it down. I don't see how taking a loan out to pay for a wedding will really help the current situation you are in now. I cannot imagine the feeling of having to pay off a wedding after the day has already passed. JMO.
shelly3950
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Re: I need to vent.. I am sooo upset and nervous!!! LONG
This is one piece of advice everyone gave to me: DON'T GO INTO DEBT OVER YOUR WEDDING. It really puts a terrible strain on your relationship. I would either push back the wedding, or have a smaller scale wedding- maybe a cocktail reception. I know weddings are important, but it is one day of your life and the most important part of it doesn't cost a thing ; ) It is not worth going deeper into debt.
Maribelle7777
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Re: Everything is going to be O.K.. update..
You can do it. You have more than a year! Just economize and put your money away as soon as you get paid. I didn't and forgot to do it for 2 months and that kinda screwed us a bit. I got nervous too last month. And that was 6 months before the wedding! But we are going to make it come hell or high water.
