FH Vent!!! (long) UPDATE

I could kill him!!!! I go out last night with one of my BMs for dinner. mind you i NEVER get to see her and this has been planned for a month! So I get home last night around 10pm and i sit on the couch and i just want to relax for a bit. it was my first time home all day from 7am. so i take out my laptop and start checking my email and of course go on LIW. FH starts b!tching at me that my pocketbooks are all over the place and y cant i clean up after myself (i ALWAYS clean up after myself). so i start ignoring him cause hes getting into 'a mood'. so he goes in the bedroom and slams the door.

im done with the laptop now, so i go to bed. he has the hockey game on blasting. so i ask him to turn it down and he says no. NO!!! i have no energy to argue with him, so i put my earplugs in (for when he snores really loud). but then he did turn down the volume and apparently hes taking to me but i cant hear him cause i have earplugs in!

then hes like...im not pleased with you. what?! he goes...you're online way too much. get ready for this...ready?

he says...'it's me or the internet'.

WHAT?!?!?!?! WHO SAYS THAT?!?!

so im like...excuse me!? i said when he stops watching so much sports, ill stop the internet. he thinks he hardly watches sports. now i have no problem with sports, i like it too. but i know he reads it at work cause he calls me at work to talk about trades (like i care). and once we get home the game HAS to be on. THEN he watches sportcenter for the highlights!!!! but I'M online too much!!!

then he calls me at work today as if nothing happened and i told him im not talking to him now cause im not going to yell while im at work. and hes like, are you hanging out with the girls tonight? (every thursday i go out with my girlfriends). i said yes..and hes like...oh great, 2 nights in a row. so im like...thats your problem!!! that i went out with my friend last night!!

wow this got to long. sorry about that. i just cant stand how he cant say whats really bothering him and instead tries to make me feel like crap! so i told him to write down whats really bothering him then tell me cause i cant fix something if i dont know the problem!!!!!!

ugh...ok, vent over. thanks.

Updated****

So FH just called 'to say hi' and act like everything was fine again. ugh i hate when he does that!! and i said i dont want to fight but im not going to act like nothing is wrong. and finally hes like...well i figured you weren't going to go out tonight because you went out last night. so it all came out that he hates that i have friends in brooklyn that i can call and make plans and all his friends are in queens are florida and he feels like he cant do that. which has been an ongoing arguement. so i told him he needs to pick up the phone and call people and not expect them to make all the effort. so now i feel like a mommy having to make a play date for her son. ughh...


thanks for listen guys.

Sounds like the two of you need to sit down and have a serious conversation. Something is obviously bugging your FH.
JMO

i think you handled all this fabulously!! from reading, it just sounds like you guys may just be stressed and its coming out in little silly things. but also, like you implied about your fh, i deal with the same thing w/ my fh...this type of situation plays out as something else is building up for my fh but i guess he cant just come out with that and sometimes he isnt even fullly aware of what it is yet so we start having these stupid little spats over nothing and then BOOM finally it all comes up, and thankfully from there we can actually deal with it productively and move on! I hope this happens for you too soon, bc I know that can be irritating. Rock it out w/ the girls tonite too! That helps!!

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Posted by Aug07OFCbride

i think you handled all this fabulously!! from reading, it just sounds like you guys may just be stressed and its coming out in little silly things. but also, like you implied about your fh, i deal with the same thing w/ my fh...this type of situation plays out as something else is building up for my fh but i guess he cant just come out with that and sometimes he isnt even fullly aware of what it is yet so we start having these stupid little spats over nothing and then BOOM finally it all comes up, and thankfully from there we can actually deal with it productively and move on! I hope this happens for you too soon, bc I know that can be irritating. Rock it out w/ the girls tonite too! That helps!!

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Thanks

Oh honey! I'm so sorry about all of this. FH & I have been at each others throats lately too. Trips to her, trips to there, family visiting, FSIL moving in & being a messy roommate I hope things get better for you soon!

Oh I'm so sorry



It sounds like there is something really bothering your FH and it's manifesting itself in other ways. It's probably the stress of everything. Maybe you two can sit down and talk it out and try to schedule more time together. During this whole wedding process, it's so easy to get lost in everything and neglect your significant other. He might feel like that and needs some kind of reassurance.

Men are silly....my fh acts like a child when he feels 'ignored'.. Then when I dote in him too much, Im a pain in the azz!! We can't win!!

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Posted by DananTodd

Men are silly....my fh acts like a child when he feels 'ignored'.. Then when I dote in him too much, Im a pain in the azz!! We can't win!!

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Amen!

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Posted by DananTodd

Men are silly....my fh acts like a child when he feels 'ignored'.. Then when I dote in him too much, Im a pain in the azz!! We can't win!!

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Very true...

My fh and I went through some serious arguing at this stage of planning our wedding. We set up some bourndaries. When he is watching sports Im on the computer planning the wedding. Our time...is our time!!!! It worked and with one month to go its smooth sailing!!!!

Sit down to dinner with your fh on Friday with no sports and no internet !!!!!

UUghhh... I'm sorry. Maybe he just misses you and feel funny saying it? You know how great men are with their feelings. Although, if he does make you choose between him and the internet good luck! (sorry Jason!)
I hope things are better today.

maybe once the arguement calms down you can see what really is bothering your guy. it could just be wedding stress--DH and i had some crazy fights during the wedding planning (especially towards the end), that we chalked up to stress. or there could be something else that is bothering him...guys are passive agressive like that....you have to PULL out of them what is wrong