FH's RH questions - updated

oh you havta see these. who asks questions like this? I'm going to keep a running list bc they're so bizarre. I told you he's a groomzilla. And mind you, I had to correct his punctuation. It made me insane.

Is there a lifeguard? (Lifeguard? w t f - no one's swimming there)

How many chair choices do we have? I don't like those twig chairs some places have.

What kind of covers do they have? and do they match the table cloths if I change them bc they have to match.

Is there a security guard for the bride's room for our stuff? (W T F? does he think we're getting married in the ghetto?)

Can they make a Transformers ice sculpture. I need that. (??????????????)

Who does that name thing on the floor? (He means a gobo. I told him 10 times, the dj co does this)

can someone direct traffic so cars don't go in the water? (there's that valet question again)

If it rains can we get a tent? (geez...a tent?)

Can they make rice and beans? We're Latin.

can you throw the balls in for free? (yes, he said balls...he means the Chinese lanterns hanging from the ceiling. the room is sort if empty without them and they're $1000)

Can the balls light up?

Can we alternate square and round tables? (I told him no. that's stupid and the square tables are a fortune.)

can we take home all the rest of the food no one eats? (All of it?)

Can I pick my beer? Can you get Carib? (that's a trinidad beer fir his grandfather btw)

Can we get a birthday cake for people whose birthdays are that day? (lol, hello idiot..that's my birthday that day. subtle you're not)

Can we bring a boat? My wife's parents have one and we want them to be able to dock there.(My parents are not driving the boat there! lol and yes he frequently refers to me as his wife)

Can we change the ceremony time to later in the afternoon?

can we split the cost of the balls if the next couple has them too?