Flower Girl Etiquette
OK, so I'm having a little bit of an issue with possibly having a flower girl. FH has a cousin who will be 3 1/2 at the time of the wedding, and she's the youngest girl in the family, so would clearly be the choice for the flower girl if we end up having one. We're going to end up having a decent amount of children at the wedding, pretty much to my chagrin, but it's all on FH's side, and FH's family is helping with majority of the reception cost, so I really can't say or do much about it. Before we knew we were going to be able to do the Sat night, the big bone of contention was that FH wanted to do the early starts on either Friday or Sunday to accomodate the children, specifically the potential FG, even though it would mean that I wouldn't get the room that I had wanted.
So when we first got engaged, the mother of the girl had made a comment like oh I better start getting my babysitters in line, which was curious. We just saw them again at a party last week, for the first time since we actually set the date. She once again said something along the lines of great, I have over a year to get a baby sitter. So I kind of was like that's wonderful, here we were almost going to revolve the entire wedding around a 3 year old, and the mother never had the slightest intention to bring her!
So that brings me to the dilemma. Do we ask her to be the flower girl now, even though it appears the mother never intended to even bring her? Like, I don't want to inconvenience the mother or father by having them feel obligated to bring her now as the flower girl if they wanted a night out by themselves. On the other hand, she could have also been fishing to see if we were going to have children at all, but she doesn't seem like the type that would do that. It was going to be a pretty much game time decision anyways, because she's maybe a little under-mature for her age currently, is toddling around, but not really speaking yet. I wanted to wait until maybe 6 months prior to see where her motor skills were at in case she wouldn't be ready yet to take directions. But now I feel if we ask her, we'll be putting the parents out. What would you all do in this situation?
So when we first got engaged, the mother of the girl had made a comment like oh I better start getting my babysitters in line, which was curious. We just saw them again at a party last week, for the first time since we actually set the date. She once again said something along the lines of great, I have over a year to get a baby sitter. So I kind of was like that's wonderful, here we were almost going to revolve the entire wedding around a 3 year old, and the mother never had the slightest intention to bring her!
So that brings me to the dilemma. Do we ask her to be the flower girl now, even though it appears the mother never intended to even bring her? Like, I don't want to inconvenience the mother or father by having them feel obligated to bring her now as the flower girl if they wanted a night out by themselves. On the other hand, she could have also been fishing to see if we were going to have children at all, but she doesn't seem like the type that would do that. It was going to be a pretty much game time decision anyways, because she's maybe a little under-mature for her age currently, is toddling around, but not really speaking yet. I wanted to wait until maybe 6 months prior to see where her motor skills were at in case she wouldn't be ready yet to take directions. But now I feel if we ask her, we'll be putting the parents out. What would you all do in this situation?
