FMIL

BklynItaliana Posted: Jun 20, 2006 10:53 AM

FMIL

question..

Is everyone getting bout and crosages for your aunts & uncles???

FMIL says she want to get have them for her brother and sister and thier spouses.

Mind you thats 2 extra crosages and 2 bouts(she said she'd pay for them) that all good and fine but what about my family.. my family is alot bigger than fh family.. i have 6 aunts and 4 uncles i would have to buy crosages and bouts for all of them.. out of my pocket b/c my mom doesn't think it's necessary..

I don't think it necessary either b/c how do the moms and grandmas and godparents stand out if the whole f'n family has bouts and crosages???

Also.. to boot she is saying she doesn't think it's a good idea that my grandmother make the flowergirl dresses.. Mind you my grandmother has been a seamstress all her life and this is like her contribution(I think she feel's like she did something) to the wedding. I don't want to take that away from her.. FMIL is saying there are 3, 3 year olds she will have to deal with.. hello my grandmas has 11 grandchildren i think she can handle a few kids... and it's not liek they are going to be there by themselves... hello thier parents are going to be with them.. then she says it's to far for them to drive.. OMG the have to drive from copiague/lindenhurst area to brooklyn..it's a 45 minute drive with traffic...

I don't want to start sayin no to FMIL but she is getting on my last nerve..

mycrayon1 Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:06 AM

Re: FMIL

We aren't doing any bout. or corsages for the aunts and uncles either. I understand where you're coming from my FMIL is starting to do the same to me only it's with the limos. You could tell her how you feel. Ler her know that you want the godparents and grandparents to stand out. Also that your family is kind of large, you don't want to exclude anyone, but you want certain people to stand out.
I love the idea of your grandmother making the flower girl dresses. Again, let he know how you feel. The parents will be with them throughout the process, and that you really want her to do it.
Don't worry it will all work out.

futrmrsblt Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:07 AM

Re: FMIL

I was having the same discussion wtih FH about cours/bout... we decided against anyone but parents and grandparents. jsut b/c it woudl get too confusing who's what etc... (liek if i saw a lady at a weddign depending on her age with a corsage id be liek oh thats so and so 's mom or gma... so i think it woudl throw off people)

as for the gma making the dresses for the fg.. thats awsome she is doing that and im sure after 11 childrren 3 with there respective parents will be a walk in the park.. id keep her doing that, it will make her feel like a special part of your day and she will appreciate it as much as you appreciate her...

good luck wtih fmil!

BklynItaliana Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:11 AM

Re: FMIL

thats what i'm saying.. FMIL is just nerotic...

Here is the bet one FMIL doens't want people comming to my house after church b/c my house is to smaill to fit everyone..thats pretty rude....

pupidda122505 Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:16 AM

Re: FMIL

sometimes u just have to say no whether u like it or not otherwise other people will start dictating how your wedding should go and that's the last thing u want. If I were u I would definitely tell her that you choose not to have your entire family wear bout. and corsages because u and FH feel that 's something that should be reserved just for the parents and grandparents to make them stand out from the rest of the guests. and as for the dresses just tell her that this is your grandmother's way of particpating in the wedding and you can't imagine taking that honor away from her. also how great will it be to look back on the dresses 20 or 30 years from now and now they were made with your grandmother's hands? I think she'll understand if u put it that way. I don't like confrontation either so I know how you must feel right now but just tell her in a nice way and I'm sure she won't give u any more problems.

BklynItaliana Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:19 AM

Re: FMIL

the thing is when she did bring it up.. i kinda said all of this already.. i explained she would be fine w/ the kids and there was no problems w/ it she already said it wouldn't be a problem.. and w/ the bouts and crosages kinds caught me off guard and i couldn't react quick enough.

Athee07 Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:20 AM

Re: FMIL

we are just getting corsages for the moms grandmas and the koumbara ( the lady who married you in the greek church)

if you get corasages for everyone- then where do you stop? It just goes on and on

giggles62 Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:31 AM

Re: FMIL

We are doing parents, grandparents, and godparents.

Unapearla Posted: Jun 20, 2006 12:46 PM

Re: FMIL

We are doing parents and grandparents only. My mom really wants us to get it for all the aunts and uncles...but I don't think it is necessary.

mskittynj Posted: Jun 20, 2006 01:36 PM

Re: FMIL

Posted by BklynItaliana

question..

Is everyone getting bout and crosages for your aunts & uncles???

FMIL says she want to get have them for her brother and sister and thier spouses.

Mind you thats 2 extra crosages and 2 bouts(she said she'd pay for them) that all good and fine but what about my family.. my family is alot bigger than fh family.. i have 6 aunts and 4 uncles i would have to buy crosages and bouts for all of them.. out of my pocket b/c my mom doesn't think it's necessary..

I don't think it necessary either b/c how do the moms and grandmas and godparents stand out if the whole f'n family has bouts and crosages???

Also.. to boot she is saying she doesn't think it's a good idea that my grandmother make the flowergirl dresses.. Mind you my grandmother has been a seamstress all her life and this is like her contribution(I think she feel's like she did something) to the wedding. I don't want to take that away from her.. FMIL is saying there are 3, 3 year olds she will have to deal with.. hello my grandmas has 11 grandchildren i think she can handle a few kids... and it's not liek they are going to be there by themselves... hello thier parents are going to be with them.. then she says it's to far for them to drive.. OMG the have to drive from copiague/lindenhurst area to brooklyn..it's a 45 minute drive with traffic...

I don't want to start sayin no to FMIL but she is getting on my last nerve..

I think everyone will bump heads with their in laws one time or another, hang in there and just tell her how you feel!
XOXOXO
Kitty