So, I absolutely adore my FMIL...she's so sweet to me and such a good mom. She's also really into her religion (Roman Catholic) and is basically the reason why we are getting married in a church. She just left me a voicemail asking to get together (just the two of us) to pick out the readings for the ceremony. I kind of feel like that should be me and FH, no? Just seemed a little odd to me and I dont know what to say! Need some of that awesome LIW advice : )
You could always tell her that FH had some input that he wanted to add - do you mind if he comes - unless she wants to make it a girls thing after lunch or something....or - have FH pick some out - bring the choices with you - that way he has input....HTH
I would never even imagine doing this as anything other than you and FH picking the readings most important to you. Maybe you and FH can pre-pick them from your Pre-Cana book and then you can go show her your choices?
Did you talk to your FH about this? Does he find it odd? Maybe you can tell his mom that you 2 planned on picking them out together but as soon as you make a decision you will let her know because you do value her opinion.
Thanks guys. I haven't spoken with FH about it yet...he gets home in a little bit so I guess we'll discuss then. I like the idea of bringing some ideas that we've already picked out....i'm just kind of irritated because I sort of feel like everyone has to have an opinion about EVERYTHING. It's our freakin wedding, geez...let us pick out the readings. She's really putting me in an uncomfortable position. But oy, pity party over, sorry lol.
hmmm, yeah mention it to FH. FH and I sat down together and chose our readings, without anyone else
Posted by HSsweethearts
I would never even imagine doing this as anything other than you and FH picking the readings most important to you. Maybe you and FH can pre-pick them from your Pre-Cana book and then you can go show her your choices?
Posted by dpanzarino
Posted by HSsweethearts
I would never even imagine doing this as anything other than you and FH picking the readings most important to you. Maybe you and FH can pre-pick them from your Pre-Cana book and then you can go show her your choices?
I agree with this entirely!!! It's definitely something you and FH need to do... they need to be meaningful for the two of you!! You can always show her the readings after they've been selected.
Did your church give you a book to choose from?
Posted by jovigirl414
I would talk it over with FH before answering her, since its your wedding and not hers. If she wants to spend some time with you, as in ladies only, then maybe you can show her what the BRIDE and GROOM chose, and then you guys can do registry stuff or something ...
And by the way, Wiggle, it's not a pity party ... You have a concern, and we are all a bunch of fellow brides, all going through similar situations. We are here for you!
I would simply explain that Fh and you would both like to pick the readings out. Im sure she will understand.. Did you ask FH how he feels about it? Maybe he wont mind you and her just going?
I feel it should be only you and fh picking out the readings. We don't include fmil in any of our wedding plans. If she was contributing it would be a different story.
I think you can politely tell her you and FH were going to go over this with the priest at your next meeting. I don't think she will take offense.
Just tell her you guys have been talking about what you want to do and FH wants to be apart of it. What could she possibly say to that? No it's her Wedding LOL
I agree with a lot of the other posters. I would just tell her that FH and you are going to pick them out together since they should be chosen to fit you guys since it is your wedding.
Posted by SoonToBeMrsCali
I don't know your FMIL but she probably means well in this sense. I would love input of someone who is really into their faith because they can sometimes help you interpret the readings and give a different perspective. Ultimately, it is your decision and she probably understands that.
FH and I have been going to church practically every Sunday since he started his confirmation/communion classes and interpreting the readings is much easier now than it was before.
Good luck and I'm sure it will turn out just fine.
Posted by wiggleit28]
You're right...she really did mean well. I talked with FH about it and he got kind of annoyed so he called her and said her feedback is welcome but that we'd like to try to pick the readings together. She felt bad and said she didn't mean to butt in but she wanted to try to explain some of the readings. Now I feel like a jerk but i'm glad it's squared away. Thanks for the advice everyone!!
