ok, so heres the deal. im getting married in 5 weeks from friday. so, all my bridesmaids are starting to get their shoes and go for fittings. now, my fiance's sister and cousin are in the wedding, so of course, his mother is getting involved. now, i told everyone from the beginning that i do not care what kind of shoe the girls get, jsut that i want it to be satin and dyeable, to match teh color of the dress. she thinks they all have to have the same shoe. i dont wnat that. i dotn believe in making people be uncomfortable in a specific shoe. all my girls are different shapes and sizes. anyways, so first off, she told me, why dont you go to the store and pick out like 5 differnet shoes and all the girls can agree on one. im like, no! then, my sister and friend already got their shoes, so she asked me for the #'s or whatever of the style shoe so they can go and maybe get the same ones, im like no! then shes telling me that she was tlaking to her daughter and telling her that since 2 of my girls already got differnt shoes, it prolly dont matter at this point. im like, it never mattered to begin wtih. im like, the shoes are not going to make or break the wedding, and no one is going to notice. shes like, well, lets hope not. i mean really, unless she is pointing it out to everyone, no one will notice. ok so it gets better. .....then shes like everyone has to get their shoes dyed at the same place, same time. im like, why? i told everyone to go as soon as they can cuz time is running out and it takes 2 weeks to dye them. i wnat this done asap for each girl individually. so she says that they need to be dyed at the same time so that they use the same bottle of dye for all the girls, cuz otherwise theyll get dyed at different times with different bottles and the color may vary. i mean really now. what is she gonna do? line up all the girls feet and compare the color? so, if it varys a tiny bit...big whoop! ahhhhhhhhhhhh! i cant take it anymore. help!! what do i do? and the bad thing is that my fiance somewhat agrees that they need to be the same. we've had a couple arguments about this already. helppp!! sorry for the long story, i needed to vent! UGH!!
nferrandi
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Re: FMIL and SHOES!!!
I agree with you that the shoes don't all need to be the same style. people should be able to choose whatever they're most compfortable with. I don't think anyone would notice if the color was slightly off, but it's not necessarily a bad idea for them to all be done at the same time if that's possible. If not, I wouldn't worry about it.
Lorena
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Re: FMIL and SHOES!!!
Oh my goodness. She must be driving you mad. Tell her that some girls don't even pick the same dress let alone the same shoes!!! I was in a wedding in December and no one could see our shoes at all. We all wore the same color and that was it. We had to lift our skirts to show each other what we picked. Don't let her bother you. Just do what you intended to do and if she doesn't like it she'll get over it!!!!! Good luck!
luvsun27
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Re: FMIL and SHOES!!!
Try this...just yes her to death, tell her that you will look into that...and DO WHAT YOU WANT! You are so right...the shoes do not matter...nobody will notice. You don't need all the extra worries right now.
tourist
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Re: FMIL and SHOES!!!
I think that's an old-fashoined notion. My friends mom was liek that & picked aout shoes for all of us & the killed me b/c the were so high & didn't coem in a a wide width.
The dying thing is kinda true, but not really. It wouldn't be as noticeable as if the dresses were from different dye lots & off a little.
AND, once Iorded shoes & a purse ( same material) to be dyed & they were completly different & the shoes had to be re-done. So doing them together is no guarantee. And when the shoes came back they matched the purse from the first dying perfectly.
If your dresses are long, it really doesn't matter.
Just tell her fine you'll get them all dyed together, and take her daughter & neice's shoes to get dyed & tell her they are being done with everyone else's, but let everyone else do their own if they want or already did.
sarahthegreat
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Re: FMIL and SHOES!!!
holy moley!! she's got issues (FMIL) nobody will be looking at anybody's feet. tell her to chill out and you do your own thing. just to piss her off, have all the girls were sneakers
2003fallwedding
Posted:
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Re: FMIL and SHOES!!!
I am in a bridal party next weekend and you can't see my shoes at all!! Even for mine, you never saw the girls shoes so it doesn't matter!! Like someone said, just yes her to death and do what you want, its your wedding...besides, your the bride, everyone will be looking at you not them
CathieH
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Re: FMIL and SHOES!!!
thanks everybody. i know, shes insane. i guess your right, ill just yes her to death. its just so frustrating, eventually im gonna just blow up at her and i dont wnat that. my fiance would be pissed. but yeh, i should make them all wear sneaker. haha. oh, and last night, she asked me what i want all the girls to do with their hair. im just like, oh boy, i dont care what they do with it. everyones hair is different. not everyone can wear it up. im like, if everyone is that 'uniform' its gonna look ridiculous. shes just like, well, some people wnat that. whateverrrrrrrr! thanks everybody for letting me vent though. she kills me sometimes. ill keep yas posted
