FMIL problem...

Julybride08 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:24 AM

FMIL problem...

So My mom and FMIL get along very well. Untill now. MY FMIL keeps saying that she found a dress that she likes and this weekend she is even going to try it on!!! My mom and her had already said that the MOB picks her color and dress first. And now FMIL is already starting. They both had originally agreeded to start looking in january/february. And the color FMIL is saying the dress is is close to the color my mom wants. What do I do??

jeffamanda080808 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:28 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

This is what I'd do.....
I'd tell FMIL to go F OFF!!!! But thats because I don't like her!!!

Seriously though...is there anyway you can sit her (FMIL) down and tell her that since they have already agreed on Jan/Feb it would only be fair to stick to that. Also, could you explain to her that new Spring/Summer designs will be out in Jan/Feb and there might be something that she would like even better.

IDK...this is a tough one...sorry.

Julybride08 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:29 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

Posted by jeffamanda080808

This is what I'd do.....
I'd tell FMIL to go F OFF!!!! But thats because I don't like her!!!

Seriously though...is there anyway you can sit her (FMIL) down and tell her that since they have already agreed on Jan/Feb it would only be fair to stick to that. Also, could you explain to her that new Spring/Summer designs will be out in Jan/Feb and there might be something that she would like even better.

IDK...this is a tough one...sorry.

I told FH to talk to her last night but he was liek I have no idea what to say. I am just mad cause now my mom is getting very upset about this. This is the one thing she was relaly looking foward to and his mom is taking away from it.

Kimbalina Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:31 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

Remind her of the Jan-Feb time frame and that your mom is not ready yet. I would straight out tell her that your mom was looking at a color close to the one that she has mentioned

ChristineAaron08 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:44 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

I understand she is excited and all to get her dress, but since you all agreed on waiting until Jan/Feb AND she is looking at a color similar to what your mom wants, its not right. IMO

Maybe she doesnt realize the ettequette or just thinks its something that doesnt need to be followed.

Are you close enough w/ her to talk to her about it?

If not, ask FH to just says something non-chalant like 'I think the MOB is supposed to pick her dress first' She will probably know its coming from you since guys dont know that stuff.

Fall Bride 2008 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:45 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

thats is very disrespectful towards your mom........I am sorry you have to deal with that!

JnD110808 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:47 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

I would also remind her of the January/February time frame as well.

My mother told me the color she wanted to wear and while I was showing my FMIL our bridesmaid dresses I slipped in what color my mother was planning to wear. So she is fully aware of the color and should know not to get something similar to it.

blu6385 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 08:53 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

me presonanlly would tell my FMIL to go screw herself but i cant stand the women ... I would honestly tell her that you guy agreed on a time and the color she chose is the color your mom wanted and that your sorry but she will have to pick another color since the MOB gets first choice and wiat to buy her dress!!!

KK Holiday Posted: Oct 26, 2007 09:03 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

i'd stay out of it. let the mothers duke it out.

who needs added stress??

AMGBride2008 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 09:23 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

I wouldn't let it bother me. In the grand scheme of things, it's no big deal. Maybe you can have your mom go ealier than planned. I wouldn't say anything to your FMIL... not worth it.

AllyDrew1108 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 09:38 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

That's NOT cool. She should wait for your mom!

Julybride08 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 09:41 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

Posted by ChristineAaron08

I understand she is excited and all to get her dress, but since you all agreed on waiting until Jan/Feb AND she is looking at a color similar to what your mom wants, its not right. IMO

Maybe she doesnt realize the ettequette or just thinks its something that doesnt need to be followed.

Are you close enough w/ her to talk to her about it?

If not, ask FH to just says something non-chalant like 'I think the MOB is supposed to pick her dress first' She will probably know its coming from you since guys dont know that stuff.

I had a similar situation, but FMIL chose a diff color at least.

I'm sorry- its always tough w/ FMILS

And she has even said in the past Oh the MOB gets her dress first. So she is well aware of it.

BubbasBride Posted: Oct 26, 2007 11:56 AM

Re: FMIL problem...

I wouldn't worry about it. Dresses are so different as well as colors. My first wedding I forbid my FMIL to wear a certain color. Looking back, I don't understand why I cared. This time around, they can each wear what they want. People will know who is who.

yelley77 Posted: Oct 26, 2007 12:02 PM

Re: FMIL problem...

So maybe, in a nice way, just say, 'Hey, I think it's great that you are looking for your dress, but you mentioned doing (brown) and my mom was thinking of brown. How about we all go out and start looking together so that you can see what style she is looking for and she can see what style you are looking for. it'll be fun and I'm sure she'd love your opinion.'

I find you get more bees with honey. If it is bothering you and your mother, you have to say something or this little tiny thing will turn into a HUGE thing. Sounds to me like she'd listen. JMO