fmil rant LONG
ok, so i've been trying to be good, i've been trying to keep my mouth shut, but i just can't anymore. she's crazy, literally. when i first met her i was like 'aw, what a nice lady, i sure lucked out.' my mistake.
ok, so basically fh gets blamed for EVERYTHING. ex 1 - he has two credit cards that she pays for from back in college (they were for his books, etc) they have a combined limit of like 1000 and he NEVER uses them. that is unless he goes home in which case he spends pretty much every day running errands for her and she tells him to put it on the cc. then if she's mad about something, she yells at him for it! 'all i do is pay your cc bills! they're thousands of dollars a month!' ok, no. it's your fault and they can't even get that high.
we stayed with her for a while, as a jumping point between ny and tx. we really didn't want to do it, esp me, but she insisted. ok, we'll only be there a week at the most. no, we end up ther for almost a month. =0\ by her insistance. i had to turn down three jobs because she basically wouldn't let us go. then she tells us we can't go up until we have jobs, that we should just stay in a hotel room instead of getting a place (a week in a hotel is a month in an apt) and she'll pay for it (and then yell at us for later). so we went up, got a place, and moved. she screamed at us.
she had a party, a week before the party her best friend's son died, and she nicely offered to plan the funeral which was the day before the party. the day of the funeral it was 'oh, poor me, i'm doing so much work, poor, poor me.' and laying in bed and having people literally wait on her. um, your best friend just lost his son. get over yourself! then, the day of her party, fh was up at 7 in the morning running errand for her, she spend the entire day in bed with me waiting on her. when the party started so did the poor me i do so much work act. then she send me out to buy more stuff and got stuck babysitting when i got back. the next day she has the nerve to scream at fh and tell him that he's lazy and does nothing around the house except eat her food and spend her money and tells him i'm the most spoiled person she's ever met. um, i've been working since 9th grade and put myself through college, you're the one who just got waited on for 2 days and bought yourself a new chloe bag and like 3 guccis. btw, planning a party for her is calling the caterer and decorating service.
now we're finally gone, but everytime fh talks to her, it's the same thing, more screaming and blaming for things he didn't do, and he just takes it. so frustrating! so i told him he needs to stand up for himself b/c she's being really abusive. and finally, he did. i am SO happy. he called her to ask her to get a dr's note b/c he has to take off work for something really important. she asks him how work is, he says he doesn't like it, she goes off on him. 'it's your fault, you do nothing, you're a slacker, you're someone who needs to be yelled at and pushed or you'll never do anything, i just payed off thousands of dollars on your credit card (the last time we used it was at her house) you do nothing!' etc etc. and he fought back. told her she has no right to talk to him that way, he's been living on his own for 5 years and she's barely seen him, so how does she know what he needs, he's calling his mother and doesn't need to be screamed at when he calls' she gets mad, hangs up, and calls back for another round. tells him she doesn't know who BRAINWASHED him, but he has no right to talk to her that way. he said she has no right to talk to him that way, told her the same thing, layed it out for her, and she ended up apologizing. i'm so happy. i told him he's probably gonna have to do this a lot, but it's a great start.
ugh, i can't wait to get back to ny. which causes a wholew new giant set of problems with her, but i'll go into that later, this is already too long. thanks for listening.
ok, so basically fh gets blamed for EVERYTHING. ex 1 - he has two credit cards that she pays for from back in college (they were for his books, etc) they have a combined limit of like 1000 and he NEVER uses them. that is unless he goes home in which case he spends pretty much every day running errands for her and she tells him to put it on the cc. then if she's mad about something, she yells at him for it! 'all i do is pay your cc bills! they're thousands of dollars a month!' ok, no. it's your fault and they can't even get that high.
we stayed with her for a while, as a jumping point between ny and tx. we really didn't want to do it, esp me, but she insisted. ok, we'll only be there a week at the most. no, we end up ther for almost a month. =0\ by her insistance. i had to turn down three jobs because she basically wouldn't let us go. then she tells us we can't go up until we have jobs, that we should just stay in a hotel room instead of getting a place (a week in a hotel is a month in an apt) and she'll pay for it (and then yell at us for later). so we went up, got a place, and moved. she screamed at us.
she had a party, a week before the party her best friend's son died, and she nicely offered to plan the funeral which was the day before the party. the day of the funeral it was 'oh, poor me, i'm doing so much work, poor, poor me.' and laying in bed and having people literally wait on her. um, your best friend just lost his son. get over yourself! then, the day of her party, fh was up at 7 in the morning running errand for her, she spend the entire day in bed with me waiting on her. when the party started so did the poor me i do so much work act. then she send me out to buy more stuff and got stuck babysitting when i got back. the next day she has the nerve to scream at fh and tell him that he's lazy and does nothing around the house except eat her food and spend her money and tells him i'm the most spoiled person she's ever met. um, i've been working since 9th grade and put myself through college, you're the one who just got waited on for 2 days and bought yourself a new chloe bag and like 3 guccis. btw, planning a party for her is calling the caterer and decorating service.
now we're finally gone, but everytime fh talks to her, it's the same thing, more screaming and blaming for things he didn't do, and he just takes it. so frustrating! so i told him he needs to stand up for himself b/c she's being really abusive. and finally, he did. i am SO happy. he called her to ask her to get a dr's note b/c he has to take off work for something really important. she asks him how work is, he says he doesn't like it, she goes off on him. 'it's your fault, you do nothing, you're a slacker, you're someone who needs to be yelled at and pushed or you'll never do anything, i just payed off thousands of dollars on your credit card (the last time we used it was at her house) you do nothing!' etc etc. and he fought back. told her she has no right to talk to him that way, he's been living on his own for 5 years and she's barely seen him, so how does she know what he needs, he's calling his mother and doesn't need to be screamed at when he calls' she gets mad, hangs up, and calls back for another round. tells him she doesn't know who BRAINWASHED him, but he has no right to talk to her that way. he said she has no right to talk to him that way, told her the same thing, layed it out for her, and she ended up apologizing. i'm so happy. i told him he's probably gonna have to do this a lot, but it's a great start.
ugh, i can't wait to get back to ny. which causes a wholew new giant set of problems with her, but i'll go into that later, this is already too long. thanks for listening.
