FMIL Vent II Dress Shopping

My vent was kinda long, so I made it into two.

Now for dress shopping. Guess what? FMIL's not wearing one. She chose this pants set. It's nice, but I don't think it's good enough for a Grooms Mother. My mother is wearing a GOWN!!!!!! I can see a guest wearing it, but not her. I've been up all night thinking about this. It's made out of the slinky material and the top/jacket has sparkles/glitter on it. Which gets everywhere. If I was having a fairytale wedding, she could be tinkerbell spreading her pixi dust!!! I want to call her to say you need to change your outfit to more formal. I explained this to her I don't know how many times yesterday. She doesn't like dresses, but you had to see what she was picking out. Short halter style dresses, umm you're not twenty honey, your in your 60's.

UGH!!! What do I do? Do I tell her to get another outfit or just say the hell with it? She'll look like an A$$ and my Mom will look so beautiful!!!

I just don't want to have f*^%$ glitter all over the tuxes and me!!!!!

oh you poor thing

i had the same issue with my FMIL - all she did was complain she didn't fit into anything! fortunately she ended up getting a dress, but honestly at that point i would not have cared what she wore. it's a reflection on her, not you. my friend's mom wore a pant suit to her son's wedding and she looked very lovely - almost as formal as the MOB. don't worry! i am sure she will look very nice.

it really stinks that you have to deal with this BUT I don't think you should say anything. I have a feeling that I'm going to be dealing with the problem myself as I KNOW my mother is going out to buy an expensive gown and I know FH's mom is not going to match my mother and I'm pretty sure it's not going to be as dressy as I think a MOG dress should but.

With that said though, I WON'T say anything to her regardless of what she picks out because I don't want to start telling people what they can or can't wear to the wedding. If that's what she feels comfortable in then so be it! It's not a reflection on you, it's a reflection on her. You did your part by trying to get her to get something fancier, now I would leave it alone. It's stress that you just don't need to deal with!

Does she have a daughter or even a sister that can go shopping with her and guide her towards a nice dress.

As an alternative, there are dressy pant outfits, but the pants are the flowing palazzo styles made out of chiffon. They mimic a long skirt but are really pants.
The designer Papel makes them, along with beaded, not glittered jackets and tops.

Do you have some time to take her shoping ?

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Posted by melissankurt07

I'm sorry you are going through this with her. I would be a little concerned about the glitter getting everywhere on you and the tuxes also. Do you think if FH said anything she would look for something different? Otherwise I would probably just let her wear it. If she looks bad oh well... it is just a reflection on her and not you. You Mom will look that much more beautiful. I am having the same problem w/ my MIL. She did buy a dress but my colors are fall and she told us she bought a FUSCIA dress!!!! I have no idea what it looks like and I freaked out about it but someone told me the same thing.... it will be her that sticks out like a sore thumb and a reflection on her not me. Good luck!!!

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What get's me is,, she's the one who wanted me to go shopping with her. So I thought this would be great and she's asking for advice. Now I get this and I'm like what the f....

We'll I wish you luck too, I think we'll both need a good stiff drink at the wedding.

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Posted by irishsweetheart

it really stinks that you have to deal with this BUT I don't think you should say anything. I have a feeling that I'm going to be dealing with the problem myself as I KNOW my mother is going out to buy an expensive gown and I know FH's mom is not going to match my mother and I'm pretty sure it's not going to be as dressy as I think a MOG dress should but.

With that said though, I WON'T say anything to her regardless of what she picks out because I don't want to start telling people what they can or can't wear to the wedding. If that's what she feels comfortable in then so be it! It's not a reflection on you, it's a reflection on her. You did your part by trying to get her to get something fancier, now I would leave it alone. It's stress that you just don't need to deal with!

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Thanks for the advice, I'm backing off now. It's not the price either. My Mom bought a beautiful gown at Sears on sale for $100. She paid $87 for hers, I just thought she would look better in something else. I'm too nice and get stepped on all the time. I think that's my real issue with her.

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Posted by SusiBtoM

Does she have a daughter or even a sister that can go shopping with her and guide her towards a nice dress.

As an alternative, there are dressy pant outfits, but the pants are the flowing palazzo styles made out of chiffon. They mimic a long skirt but are really pants.
The designer Papel makes them, along with beaded, not glittered jackets and tops.

Do you have some time to take her shoping ?

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No she doesn't and I did take her yesterday. That's what I wanted her to wear, I knew that she wasn't crazy about a dress. I saw something beautiful online at JCPenny and thought Wow she would look beautiful in this. It was on sale for $89 too. No she just went to Macy's and bought the only thing she tried on.

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Posted by ant n tilde

i am in a similar situation.

My mother is wearing a gown and getting her hair and makeup done

FMIL is wearing a dress - that my mother would not even wear to my friend's weddings - it is nice dress if you are going out to a fancy dinner NOT a wedding. It is not even a dress, it is a skirt, top and jacket - but not even like a 'blazer' just a sheer jacket. She is also not getting her hair done.

You know what? They are adults and they have been to weddings before. They know what people wear - so they should know what is appropriate. I just think that when hte big day comes, they are going to see what other people are wearing and either they won't care or they will feel under dressed.

i am a little sad that she doesnt think her son's wedding is worth getting a little more 'formal' but there is nothing that we can do - just let it be and your mom will look FABULOUS!

sorry so long - this became a vent!

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I so agree. Thanks!!!

That totally sux!

but i would just leave it--SHE is the one that will look silly and not you. maybe if your FH said something to her like 'well HER mom is wearing this gorgeous gown....don't you want to wear something more dressy so ppl can tell you're the MOG!'

I'll be completely honest - those glitter tops drive me crazy!!!! My grandma and FMIL tried on gowns like this and the one my grandma tried was really beautiful but DANG THAT GLITTER WAS EVERYWHERE! I told her that I can just see it all over my FH's tux and my dress and on everyone that she hugs and thankfully another lady at the store backed me up on it.

If it weren't for the glitter top part, I'd say to let it lie and leave her be. But to be honest, those glitter things get EVERYWHERE! I'd use that to ask her (or have her son ask her!!!!) to change to something else.