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FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

christine2010 Posted:

FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.



As some of you may recall, FMIL has shirked some of her wedding related responsibilities. She just decided that she doesn’t have the money to pay for the flowers, so FH took on the responsibility & then she decided to cut the RD invites down to the “bare minimum.”
Which in her mind was: (16 Adults & 3 Kids)
FH & I
Her
my parents
4 bridesmaids
5 groomsmen
my brother & SIL & the 3 kids
Remember that one of my BMs is married & the other 3 are in long term relationships. In order to keep peace FH will be paying for the 4 bridesmaids to be able to bring their significant others.

So after meeting with our Priest at Pre-Cana we told FMIL that the only date convenient for the majority of people involved is Saturday, April 10 @ 5:45. All she had to do was call the restaurant & set up a reservation for 20 adults & 3 kids at figure 7:15. (Pre-Cana was last Saturday) FH has reminded her to call every night this week. & I told her on Monday that I was ordering the invites, to which her response was, “So happy to hear you are following etiquette.” At that very moment I wanted to punch her in the face since during this entire planning process she must have lost the FMIL pages of the etiquette book.

When she arrived to work, a half hour ago, I gave her, her invite. & her answer to me was, “You know, you went ahead & did all of this & I haven’t spoken to the restaurant yet.”
AngnShaun Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

omg shes is so out of line...

if i were you i would remove all responsibility from her... she obviously doesnt give two shyts about it...
christine2010 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

I forgot to mention that she never RSVP'd to my shower. My sister had to call her a number of times.
& her comment to me on the Monday after my shower, 'Wow I can't believe the party your mother threw.' mind you FH & I have been dating for 10 years & she has attended many events that my family has had.

& she just gave me the RSVP to the wedding the yesterday. the RSVP date is tomorrow.
mariedsgn Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

OMG!!!!!!
I would be so annoyed!
MrsC2010 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

ugh thats so annoying.
joctorre Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

Yeah, definitely remove all of her responsibility. Stinks that you guys have to double check and follow up on her and follow through FOR her... I'm sorry....

Definitely her and not you!!!!
mariedsgn Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.


Posted by christine2010

I forgot to mention that she never RSVP'd to my shower. My sister had to call her a number of times.
& her comment to me on the Monday after my shower, 'Wow I can't believe the party your mother threw.' mind you FH & I have been dating for 10 years & she has attended many events that my family has had.

& she just gave me the RSVP to the wedding the yesterday. the RSVP date is tomorrow.



OMG! sounds like she has problems! BIG TIME!
StaceyWill Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

Wow!!! That's sooo not cool.

asg450 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

Yeah, it's her not you. You told her you were ordering the invites so she should have gotten on it. it's not much for her to make a phone call. I hope you and FH don't end up arranging everything for the RD.
regy_k Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

OMG I got all annoyed and mad just by reading, cant even imagine how u feel actually going thru this
sorry Christine!
this is exactly why me and FH handle EVERYTHING ourselves. if u dont do it urself, nothing will get done IMO
kris_gets_hitched Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

Wow. She's really out of line. W T F, you guys have been together forever...it's really not the time for her to be all passive and cranky about your wedding and the events leading up to it. She had 10 years to voice any opinions she may have, if that's where this is all stemming from. At this point, she needs to put on her big girl panties and go along with things.


christine2010 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

what is most upsetting is that I paid for the invites & postage myself. out of my monthly allowance money, not out of wedding money.
I didn't purchase expensive invites but when you have a monthly budget to stick to a little hiccup hurts.
JAAMS Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

oh my goshhh! she sounds dreadful!

JenBill61210 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

20mrsc10 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.

i could be wrong, but wouldn't she be one of the people you just assume will be there? like i know my parents/fil's will not actually rsvp to anything, they want to keep the cards as a keepsake

however, wouldn't you also double check that she made the reservation before you ordered invites?
christine2010 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.


Posted by 20mrsc10

i could be wrong, but wouldn't she be one of the people you just assume will be there? like i know my parents/fil's will not actually rsvp to anything, they want to keep the cards as a keepsake

however, wouldn't you also double check that she made the reservation before you ordered invites?



i do not assume anyone is going to do anything. i even made my parents (who helped assemble the cards & who are paying for the RH) fill out an RSVP & put it sealed into the RSVP box. i gave my mom another blank one to save.

as far as double checking with her about making a reservation, its a brain less task to call your friend at a restaurant & set up a reservation. i could not wait any longer to send the invites since the RD is 3 weeks from tomorrow. & with the wedding being 5 weeks from today it is the ONLY saturday available to do the rehearsal.
christine2010 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.


Posted by 20mrsc10

i could be wrong, but wouldn't she be one of the people you just assume will be there? like i know my parents/fil's will not actually rsvp to anything, they want to keep the cards as a keepsake




i just thought of anther point as the why her RSVPing was a must. since she is not paying for a damn thing other then who she thinks should be at a RD, as far as i am concerned she is a guest at this wedding.
laurenandmike618 Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.


wow she sounds awful. only thing i don't agree with you on is that your BMs don't need to bring their SOs. my FFIL told me he wants to invite our parents, grandparents (FH has 4 i have 0), aunts and uncles, and the bridal party, and only spouses or fiance/es of the bridal party, but no bfs and gfs and i completely agree with him.

but everything else - wow... she really has a bug up her you know what.
Iluvpoodles Posted:

Re: FMIL vent - once again - please tell me its her & not me.


Posted by christine2010



, “So happy to hear you are following etiquette.” At that very moment I wanted to punch her in the face since during this entire planning process she must have lost the FMIL pages of the etiquette book.

When she arrived to work, a half hour ago, I gave her, her invite. & her answer to me was, “You know, you went ahead & did all of this & I haven’t spoken to the restaurant yet.”


Ok that comment would have made me want to rip her hair out. How passive aggressive

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