For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Original post by akaMrsT

Jun 12, 2006 05:43 PM

We are doing our thank you cards slowly but surely. As I'm sure everyone does, we know exactly what each guests gave as a gift (including those who did not attend but sent gift) and are trying to incorporate a special thank you for 'such and such' in the card.

Honestly, so future brides will be aware, our gifts total about 80% of the costs of the reception. We did have some guests give cards and some that did not give a card. But they all showed up from near and far and they all went out of their way to celebrate with us.

I cannot fathom how anyone can expect to 'make a profit' by throwing a wedding

Granted, I'm sure there are those who had super generous guests and family members but I'm sure this thread will reveal that only a handful of couples 'got back' what they spent on the wedding in gifts. And NOT counting cash gifts from parents I am sure that number is less than 10% of LIW couples.

Please add yours.

No dollar amounts please

ETA - gifts are still coming in (after the thank you cards went out). So far gifts have totalled about 50% of the wedding costs (entire reception covered ) We are still shocked since we prepared ourselves to receive ZILCH as gifts

Goldi1021 Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:14 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by prinses777

Posted by Goldi1021

I will also say that it is a good post especially for people who might be counting on 'gifts' to either pay off wedding expenses or to finance a home. I would hate to see people misinformed and further into debt than before their weddings. Many young people (and even old farts like me) can get themselves into a poop load of trouble with poor planing. Perhaps this was what the intent of the original post was. Thats what I am thinking.

Good Call. I find it to be very informtive and gives brides a reality check... as to what to expect.

I not have had my wedding yet... cannot post what I got back. hehehhe

My estimation is that you will make ELEVENTY BILLION DOLLARS!!!

prinses777 Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:14 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by Goldi1021

Posted by prinses777

Posted by Goldi1021

I will also say that it is a good post especially for people who might be counting on 'gifts' to either pay off wedding expenses or to finance a home. I would hate to see people misinformed and further into debt than before their weddings. Many young people (and even old farts like me) can get themselves into a poop load of trouble with poor planing. Perhaps this was what the intent of the original post was. Thats what I am thinking.

Good Call. I find it to be very informtive and gives brides a reality check... as to what to expect.

I not have had my wedding yet... cannot post what I got back. hehehhe

My estimation is that you will make ELEVENTY BILLION DOLLARS!!!

You are so UNDER ESTIMATING!

ant n tilde Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:14 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

i want to thank all of you who answered this question honestly

this is something i was very curious about but would feel funny asking myself

it is very helpful to know that we shouldnt expect to get back what we put into the wedding. . . i am a smart girl but somewhere deep in my brain i cant let go of that idea! we will start saving for a house after the wedding and i keep thinking 'oh we will definitely get to use the wedding gifts for a down payment - part of one anyway'

but it is a GREAT reality check to be reminded that that probably WON't be the case. . . AND it is a GREAT motivation to achieve our goal to pay for our entire wedding before it is over. . . .all cash and checks NO credit, no loans, no borrowing - so far so good but we are early in the process!

Thanks again for the honest information i appreciate it! I will bookmark this post and look at it everytime i HAVE to add some stupid expense lol

Goldi1021 Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:16 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by akaMrsT

Posted by Goldi1021

I will agree that the reasoning behind this thread is harmless. One should take the time to read the original poster's review in the review section. You would see, through her experiences in planning, that her wedding day was not about what people could give her and her DH, but more about their love for each other and sharing that special day with their friends and family. That being said, lets not get all in a huff about it. She meant no harm.

Thanks Leslie. Who knew that bumping a helpful thread would cause drama

This was posted a while back and updated today. I also posted on the newlywed board. It was in response to all the unrealistic threads about couples 'making money' on the wedding. I am really hoping that future couples get a 'reality check' from the past brides responses if they were expecting to 'make money' on their weddings.

My pleasure. Truth be told, I didnt look at the original post date but this subject come up often enough that someone needed to say something.

Truth be told again, If my intent was to MAKE money at my wedding, I would have had a weenie roast in my back yard and a cake made of twinkies with 600 of my closest friends!

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:18 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

this thread has drama written all over it

HearzBellz Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:18 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by Goldi1021

Truth be told again, If my intent was to MAKE money at my wedding, I would have had a weenie roast in my back yard and a cake made of twinkies with 600 of my closest friends!

Weenie roast at Goldi's place!

j/k

Goldi1021 Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:21 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by HearzBellz

Posted by Goldi1021

Truth be told again, If my intent was to MAKE money at my wedding, I would have had a weenie roast in my back yard and a cake made of twinkies with 600 of my closest friends!

Weenie roast at Goldi's place!

j/k

It's cool as long as the weenies are Hebrew National and it is after the sun goes down otherwise I couldnt get a Rabbi!!

cjb88 Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:22 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by HearzBellz

Posted by Goldi1021

Truth be told again, If my intent was to MAKE money at my wedding, I would have had a weenie roast in my back yard and a cake made of twinkies with 600 of my closest friends!

Weenie roast at Goldi's place!

j/k

Goldi, dont forget about the cheeese!!!!

johnsae Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:25 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

I honestly feel that NOBODY is having a wedding in order to make money - that is just silly.

akaMrsT Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:28 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by johnsae

I honestly feel that NOBODY is having a wedding in order to make money - that is just silly.

I know!!!! But you would be surprised at the number of people who really believe they will 'MAKE MONEY' by having a wedding

This was the thread that prompted this post - 6/12/2006 post re: Knottie

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:29 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by johnsae

I honestly feel that NOBODY is having a wedding in order to make money - that is just silly.

not only that but the whole point of finding out how much people get as wedding gifts is moot.

it's like saying - how much do you make for a living, I want to know what I can expect to earn.

depends on the amount of guests, type of guests, people's generosity (or lack thereof), and a 100 other variables.

weddingbunny Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:30 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by johnsae

I honestly feel that NOBODY is having a wedding in order to make money - that is just silly.

you would hope so - but I have definitely seen ladies here and on other message boards talking as if they were - if not to make money, then at least expecting to make all of their money back.

I think for that reason this thread is a great idea - and there's no reason it should turn into a dramatic mess. Folks should just post their numbers if they have them, and move on if they don't. There are too many people who are misguided in their planning and really expect a lot in terms of gifts, and they need to know that it doens't always work that way.

enjft Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:30 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by johnsae

I honestly feel that NOBODY is having a wedding in order to make money - that is just silly.

I agree with you. If you make anything back be damn greatful. I for one am having a wedding to marry the man I have been with for the past 10 yrs. I dont even care about who comes are not because we both will be there.

There is nothing wrong to compare notes with past brides to get an idea where you stand.

What I have seen happen with these threads over the past few days is that people are switching and steering from the main question. Then it gets to ur bother my friend or making fun of me nonsense.

Johnsae asked a question about a thank u. In no way in the original post did she say that this guy was the scum of the earth for not bringing anything. Nor should it have prompted the debate that came about it.

Same here on this thread. Katrina wanted to give future brides an idea of what to expect and express that expectations are unreal. Here we go again with drama. I just dont get it

stephanief Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:34 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by Meaghan729

im sorry, Have I stepped outside of the United States of America, in which there is something called freedom of speech?? Is this not an open forum to which we can give opinons, or am I wrong?

I am entitled to my own opinion - and I wasnt involved in the prior post, so thats why i responded here.

Who gives a doo doo about who got back what % of the $ they spent unless they want to see how much everyone else made??

why ask in the first place??

don't even start

HearzBellz Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:36 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by Goldi1021

Posted by HearzBellz

Posted by Goldi1021

Truth be told again, If my intent was to MAKE money at my wedding, I would have had a weenie roast in my back yard and a cake made of twinkies with 600 of my closest friends!

Weenie roast at Goldi's place!

j/k

It's cool as long as the weenies are Hebrew National and it is after the sun goes down otherwise I couldnt get a Rabbi!!

prinses777 Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:37 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

I already sent MrsT a FM.

I in no way intented to start the drama I just thought something needed to be said becuase I felt the post was turned in the wrong direction.

BLAH BLAH BLAH... Sorry.

enjft Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:38 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by prinses777

I already sent MrsT a FM.

I in no way intented to start the drama I just thought something needed to be said becuase I felt the post was turned in the wrong direction.

BLAH BLAH BLAH... Sorry.

I dont think u started it dear

akaMrsT Posted: Jul 07, 2006 01:39 PM

Re: For future brides - Married ladies sharing gift info.

Posted by Goldi1021

Posted by akaMrsT

Posted by Goldi1021

I will agree that the reasoning behind this thread is harmless. One should take the time to read the original poster's review in the review section. You would see, through her experiences in planning, that her wedding day was not about what people could give her and her DH, but more about their love for each other and sharing that special day with their friends and family. That being said, lets not get all in a huff about it. She meant no harm.

Thanks Leslie. Who knew that bumping a helpful thread would cause drama

This was posted a while back and updated today. I also posted on the newlywed board. It was in response to all the unrealistic threads about couples 'making money' on the wedding. I am really hoping that future couples get a 'reality check' from the past brides responses if they were expecting to 'make money' on their weddings.

My pleasure. Truth be told, I didnt look at the original post date but this subject come up often enough that someone needed to say something.

Truth be told again, If my intent was to MAKE money at my wedding, I would have had a weenie roast in my back yard and a cake made of twinkies with 600 of my closest friends!

And it would have been a blast I'm sure I debated a BBQ wedding for a long time and posted about it after doing a bit of research too We could have invited everyone to the BBQ instead of narrowing it down to 261 guests