For those of you who get frustrated by spelling.....
EURO-ENGLISH TO BE THE OFFICIAL LANGUAGE OF THE EU
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European
Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would become known as 'EuroEnglish.'
In the first year, 'S' will replace the soft 'c.' Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k.' This should klear up konfusion,and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing public enthusiasm in the second year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f.' This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the third year, public akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expected to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are
possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a difikulty to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of th silent 'e' in the languaj is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replacing the 'th' with a 'z' and 'w' with 'v.'
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl, ja. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking ze Deutsch like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
If zis maks you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepul!
EGSILINT
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European
Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would become known as 'EuroEnglish.'
In the first year, 'S' will replace the soft 'c.' Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k.' This should klear up konfusion,and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing public enthusiasm in the second year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f.' This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the third year, public akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expected to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are
possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a difikulty to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of th silent 'e' in the languaj is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replacing the 'th' with a 'z' and 'w' with 'v.'
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl, ja. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking ze Deutsch like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
If zis maks you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepul!
EGSILINT
