Do you ever get sick of having to ask him to do everything? His jobs around the apartment include washing the dishes, cleaning the bathroom and taking out the garbage. Why is it that I ALWAYS have to ask him to take out the garbage when it is full. Or sometimes on the weekend he will take a night off from doing the dishes which is fine, but then he doesn't do them the next day. He leaves them sitting there and then I have to start doing them because there is something I need to use to make dinner that night. The thing that is even worse is that when I finally get frustrated and go to do it myself then he offers to do it. Like there has been a cardboard box from his new phone sitting by the front door for weeks. I picked it up on Saturday to see what was in it and when I realized it was garbage I went to take it outside. Then he jumps off the couch like 'Oh I'll throw it out' I want to be like 'why haven't you thrown it out the last 50 times you walked past it when you leave the apt.' It's just frustrating that I can know when the apartment needs to be cleaned or vacuumed or the laundry has to be done or the garbage has to go out, yet he can't figure these things out on his own. I am so tired of telling him he has to do things that are his responsibility to begin with. Sorry to vent I just needed to get it off my chest.
VeggieBride
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hahahah aww
I complain about this on a daily basis...to myself and my mom haha
Anyone who said the men are the head of the household is full of sh*t!
When i ask him to do something he does. I think sometimes men just dont think to do things....its just how they're wired.
JennyAPH
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yes yes yes yes yes yes.. and yes. I agree. My FH has two 'chores' to vacuum and to clean out the cat litter box. I do EVERYTHING else... but I get no help and end up doing his stuff too! The other day he had off so I asked him to clean the hall bathroom and when I got home it was a mess.. so I asked him why he didnt do it and he told me he couldnt 'find the cleaner'... I LEFT IT IN THE BATHROOM FOR HIM.. so clearly he didn't even look!!
They are men.. I fear there is no changing this!!! Altho when I get angry about it he will be better for a week or two.
thenewmrsharrington
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don't even get me started!
bkbaby4life
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my FH's favorite line.......
'i'll help you! just ask!'
well i dont want to f*cking ask!
anywho...the only way i got thru to him was one day having a total break down and crying my eyes out. so he helps out now. its not 100% better but its leaps better from how he was when we first moved in 1.5 years ago.
i would say just talk to him firmly and sincerely and tell him that you CANT DO THIS ALONE. you are not a maid and you need him to HELP without you asking all the time. and if that doesnt work........just cry and yell. :)
Dr Meg
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I am glad I am not the only one. And when he sees that I get mad about it he is like 'well just tell me when something needs to be done.' I have already told him I don't want to have to tell him all the time. If I can figure out things need to be done around the apt so can he.
egem523
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Posted by thenewmrsharrington
don't even get me started!
ditto for me He knows that dished in the sink make me annoyed especially when I know the whole morning you were watching TV and playing video games.
VeggieBride
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when i had roommates we used to make a chart of things that needed to be done. everything always got done and i lived with guys. maybe try that? hahaha The one thing FH does do without me asking is the dishes. I DONT DO dishes. ahaha. When i have a dishwasher ill be more than happy to load the sucker. Til then FH will have dish pan hands.
CandB4604
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Oh my gosh - I totally agree. No one has to tell me to clean the counters, food shop, cook, clean up, dishes, laundry, general straightening up the rooms...and if I ask him to do one thing, I have to ask all sheepishly! haha As if its a favor to me!
aimerlena01
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OH my goodness. We had a fight about this on Friday. I love how his idea of cleaning is really just putting stuff away. It doesn't entail washing anything!! hahahaha! Got to love it!
Future Mulligan
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these are things that will more than likely NEVER change.....my FH takes out the trash BUT he forgets to put a new bag in, so when i go to throw something out it can be a disaster since there is no bag....he leaves some of his things out on the bathroom counter in the morning, he leaves loose change all around the apartment and doesnt put it in the jar - there are a bunch of little things that he does (or doesn't do!) that annoy me and no matter how much i tried nagging he wouldnt remember and then when id ask him to do it he'd get annoyed at me..........you want to know what, putting his change in the jar and putting a new bag in the garbage isnt that much of a big deal - now i just do it - it takes more energry nagging him to do it then if i just do it myself - my FH works very hard, works long hours, helps out a lot around the house, so its not the worst thing if i pick up after him a little - i have it a lot easier then he does - i leave later, get home earlier, i have a less stressful job, in the scheme of things its better to just do things myself instead of nag him and cause an argument - now that doesnt go for everything, but after living with someone for 3 years you know their habits - and i know that no matter how many time i ask him to put in a trash bag or put his change in the jar he'll forget to me its not a battle worth fighting over....KWIM?
Dr Meg
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Posted by Future Mulligan
these are things that will more than likely NEVER change.....my FH takes out the trash BUT he forgets to put a new bag in, so when i go to throw something out it can be a disaster since there is no bag....he leaves some of his things out on the bathroom counter in the morning, he leaves loose change all around the apartment and doesnt put it in the jar - there are a bunch of little things that he does (or doesn't do!) that annoy me and no matter how much i tried nagging he wouldnt remember and then when id ask him to do it he'd get annoyed at me..........you want to know what, putting his change in the jar and putting a new bag in the garbage isnt that much of a big deal - now i just do it - it takes more energry nagging him to do it then if i just do it myself - my FH works very hard, works long hours, helps out a lot around the house, so its not the worst thing if i pick up after him a little - i have it a lot easier then he does - i leave later, get home earlier, i have a less stressful job, in the scheme of things its better to just do things myself instead of nag him and cause an argument - now that doesnt go for everything, but after living with someone for 3 years you know their habits - and i know that no matter how many time i ask him to put in a trash bag or put his change in the jar he'll forget to me its not a battle worth fighting over....KWIM?
My FH doesn't replace the bag either, haha. I guess their brains just aren't wired the way our's are. Luckily he doesn't get annoyed when I have to ask him to do something. He'll actually just get up and do it. I just get frustrated having to ask over and over again.
JennyAPH
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Two things that kill me!!! Cereal in the drain in the sink and when he opens a new thing of milk and leaves the little red milk ring on the counter.. TWO INCHES AWAY FROM THE GARBAGE.
beram63
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we're upgrading and there's stuff we need that we don't have. we are registering for china, getting a good vacuum, asking for appliances that we've never had (i.e. food processor, new iron, etc.)
sarahdavid
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Posted by thenewmrsharrington
don't even get me started!
haha thats how I feel.
littlepixie12
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thats because men cant live without us!
JennyAPH
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I have to add that my FH was pretty good about 'doing the dishes'.. until recently when our dishwasher broke and we have to wash everything by hand.. Now the dishes pile up until I do them and i ask why he stopped and he said cause he doesnt have a dishwasher!!! W T F!!
I could go on all day. Luckily i laugh about half this stuff otherwise I would kill him
NikkiR515
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We were having this same issue BIG TIME... Finally we got into a huge fight and came up with a new plan.. Every Sunday, we are both assigned new chores.. We give ourselves the whole week to do it but once it is done, we are respoonsible for it from now on.. Ie: Last week he was responsible for picking up his clothes that he leaves laying around... He finally did it last night but now he is responsible for maintaining it every week! This week he is responsible for dusting in the living room... Next week it will be something else... I am also taking on chores every week (even though I am forever doing chores!) so it is 'equal'...So far this system seems to be working but it has only been a week so we will see what happens in a months time!
Sweets14
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Mine can't find anything on his own. I really don't know what he'd do if i wasn't here!! And of course i need to leave him a list of things i need done!! I shouldn't have to ask you to take the garbage out can't you see it's full!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My favorite is the hair around the bathroom sink every morning!!!!!!!! The one credit i will give him is that he loves to cook. And very well!!!!! He's lucky i love him!!!!!!
Sweets14
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And mine is also a sneaky lil b*stard!! He decides to do the laundry and turns all of my white shirts and socks navy blue!!!!!!!!! What the F@ck//!!?????!!!!!! The man has been on his own since he was 17 tell me you don't know how to do laundry!!!!! He did that purposely because he is banned from the washer and dryer now!!!!
