For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

Hi ladies, for those who have planned a shower, I could really use some help getting started!

My daughter's wedding is June 07. She has been in several BP's and was involved with the planning and financing of the showers, and said that was one thing I didn't have to worry about!

However, MOH is her younger sister who has never even attended a shower, and doesn't know the other BM's very well. So far none of the BM's have mentioned a shower to me or to MOH. I realize it's 'only' September... but I don't know how far ahead these things need to be done! And 2 of the BM's are out-of-state.

Is it up to MOH to get the ball rolling? Should she maybe e-mail the other girls and ask if they already have some ideas? How do you handle the finances? (I am prepared to help them here.) Should MOH ask them what they are prepared to spend? Or should we get some prices first before she contacts them and ask them how they feel about that amount? She is definitely not comfortable doing this without their input.

So I would welcome any ideas on how others have started the shower discussion, especially if the BP are not all good friends with each other?

I know you girls have lots of great ideas,
TIA!

Re: For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

I have never planned a shower...but my friend had the same situation. I was talked with her mother thats how i found out. The girls in the party were mostly younger and the MOH lived out of state so the mother of the bride did basically everything for the shower...including paying for it. The girls that were older were really no help but if they had a suggestion the mother listened but didnt necessarily follow it. Basically her mother felt she deserved a nice shower and obv these girls were not going to make that happen so she did herself. Hope this helps

Re: For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

Hey Momma! I would think that if the wedding was in June that you would have the shower in April. That's plenty of time before the wedding. The MOH and the MOB usually gets things rolling. What I would do first is find out how many people you plan on inviting and then check out some places and get prices. Figure out how much each girl would have to chip in for each place. This way you have something tangible to present the BM's with. After that it's planning a party! Good Luck!!!

Re: For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

I am in a wedding and we are in the process of planning her shower. Her parents are paying for the restaurant the bridesmaids are paying for everything else, i.e. invitations, favors, centerpieces, etc. Her sister, the MOH, sent out a mass email to everyone to get the ball rolling. HTH!!

Re: For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

It can be kind of akward I suppose... how about checking around first and finding some prices-- then you can figure out how you'd like to divide it out- I would say that the MOB & the MOH would be the top dogs in planning- but maybe you could try to include the MOG too- she might like that! I know my FMIL would be THRILLED to be included! Good luck to you!

Re: For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

Thanks girls!

Jiffy that's a great suggestion, we'll get some sample prices as well as an estimate on having it here at home, and then we have something to go to them with.

Happy planning!

Re: For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

Mine was at home and we had everything that you could ever want. With about 45 people it ended up costing about $2000. It probably would have been cheaper to have it in a place, but it was nice to have people not rush. My mom had a large banner made (from ebay) with our names on it, in our wedding colors. The BMs were each responsible for things... invitations, favors, flowers,wishing well,etc.

Re: For those who have planned a shower, I need help!!

Definetly start looking at places now. I would say2-4 months before the wedding is a good time to have the shower. I would call each girl individually-MOH first and get her input. Maybe if the out of staters are coming to LI for the holidays or to visit someone, you guys could get together and start planning.