FOR WIVES OR FUTURE WIVES OF COPS

do you ever worry when your FH doesn't come home right after work? Let me give you a little history.. My FH works the midnight tour and has since we met. I've NEVER worried about him...mainly because I try to not think about where he is going and the type of work he is doing (it helps believe it or not). I always tried to look at it like he's off to his 'night job'. Now ...given the recent events that have occurred in our lives...I can't help but worry about him. It scares me now to see him getting his gun ready for work, and even more when I don't hear from him in the morning. We usually talk every morning when he gets home from work ...and today for some reason I haven't heard anything. Am I being paranoid??? I just keep having these visions lately..and it's really freaking me out.

Ok I called him..which I try to never do..because the last time I did that he was watching a body...lol. He's in court right now...but I still worry!!

My FH is in the Army, and I fear that he will get sent overseas again...

He also wants to be a Suffolk County cop (he is Military Police in the Army Reserve now). I understand that this is something he wants to do, and I support him, however, I have the same fears you have. I think it is totally natural, and I understand where you are coming from.

I am glad your FH is ok though!

My FH use to work the midnight tour also, and i use to worry all the time, but when u think about it, how many cops are killed a year (not many), and what neightbor hood does he work in... at night time, there isn't much going on unless he works in a bad area ex bronx or brooklyn....my fh works in an area thats not bad.....Now he works the day shift so i feel better....

P.S. i use to get worried when he didn't call, but usually it was b/c of an arrest and he couldn't call. But after a while of my complaining, he always calls when he knows he can't use his phone (like before he goes into court)

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Posted by neener1211

My FH is in the Army, and I fear that he will get sent overseas again...

He also wants to be a Suffolk County cop (he is Military Police in the Army Reserve now). I understand that this is something he wants to do, and I support him, however, I have the same fears you have. I think it is totally natural, and I understand where you are coming from.

I am glad your FH is ok though!

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MY FH is a cop in White Plains...which isn't as DANGEROUS as NYPD (in my opinion). None the less..it is still a dangerous career..and I just can't help but worry now. I HATE that I feel this way..because I never worried before...but now I do. just the sight of his gun...terrifies me now..and I've been to the range w/him..but I think I've just been affected by what happened recently with my sons girlfriend. (RIP).

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Posted by butapecan3

My FH use to work the midnight tour also, and i use to worry all the time, but when u think about it, how many cops are killed a year (not many), and what neightbor hood does he work in... at night time, there isn't much going on unless he works in a bad area ex bronx or brooklyn....my fh works in an area thats not bad.....Now he works the day shift so i feel better....

P.S. i use to get worried when he didn't call, but usually it was b/c of an arrest and he couldn't call. But after a while of my complaining, he always calls when he knows he can't use his phone (like before he goes into court)

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Well..I live in the Bronx..but a nicer area (Throggs Neck). THank god he doesn't work for NYPD. However...even in a nice area..things happen. For instance...recently my sons girlfriend committed suicide with her fathers gun who is a correction officer. SHe lived 2 houses down. It's just a scary thought that she knew where he kept it. I have a son who is 15 and I know he'd never do that..but you can't help but wonder. I will say that White Plains is not AS bad..but it has it's moments.

WOW, that is scary (about sons GF)! Try not to get too worried or you'll make yourself sick....
He will be okay, at least he is not NYPD, I think he is much safer in White Plains....

PS I live in Eastchester, which is 5 minutes from White Plains......

My FH is not a cop but he works in Brooklyn everyday and anything can happen there or anywhere. I don't think anyone is safe from a car accident, a heart attack, etc.

ETA: While I think it is devastating to lose a child, I believe parents need to keep their guns in a combination safe.

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Posted by Mitabtrfly

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Posted by butapecan3

My FH use to work the midnight tour also, and i use to worry all the time, but when u think about it, how many cops are killed a year (not many), and what neightbor hood does he work in... at night time, there isn't much going on unless he works in a bad area ex bronx or brooklyn....my fh works in an area thats not bad.....Now he works the day shift so i feel better....

P.S. i use to get worried when he didn't call, but usually it was b/c of an arrest and he couldn't call. But after a while of my complaining, he always calls when he knows he can't use his phone (like before he goes into court)

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Well..I live in the Bronx..but a nicer area (Throggs Neck). THank god he doesn't work for NYPD. However...even in a nice area..things happen. For instance...recently my sons girlfriend committed suicide with her fathers gun who is a correction officer. SHe lived 2 houses down. It's just a scary thought that she knew where he kept it. I have a son who is 15 and I know he'd never do that..but you can't help but wonder. I will say that White Plains is not AS bad..but it has it's moments.

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OMG stories like that scare me...it worries me that when we have kids they are going to be curious about the gun... i told him that he better get a gun lock and safe that he is the only one that knows the code...and not show them where it is.

its also scary that u never know who they are going to pull over....

My Father, brother, Uncle on my Mom's side, cousin, Uncle on my Dad's side and Great Uncle are all Police Officers... some are retired now but either way, growing up the best thing I could do was keep it out of my mind, I prayed every night and they were OK.

My brother was the hardest because he was working in NYC (the 75) for a very long time and my Mom used to get so scared if he wouldn't get home on time (if he made an arrest, got caught up, etc) so she just told him, you HAVE to call me if something happens and you get caught up-- so he did. Maybe tell your FH that he needs to call if anything happens and he gets caught up until you feel more comfortable.

It's understandable to be worried-- the best day for me was when my brother got the Nassau Police job (working in Woodbury) and was able to get out of East New York-- it was like winning the Lottery for us. So I would tell your FH that and just try to keep a positive frame of mind.

I know it's hard though

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Posted by Mitabtrfly

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Posted by neener1211

My FH is in the Army, and I fear that he will get sent overseas again...

He also wants to be a Suffolk County cop (he is Military Police in the Army Reserve now). I understand that this is something he wants to do, and I support him, however, I have the same fears you have. I think it is totally natural, and I understand where you are coming from.

I am glad your FH is ok though!

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MY FH is a cop in White Plains...which isn't as DANGEROUS as NYPD (in my opinion). None the less..it is still a dangerous career..and I just can't help but worry now. I HATE that I feel this way..because I never worried before...but now I do. just the sight of his gun...terrifies me now..and I've been to the range w/him..but I think I've just been affected by what happened recently with my sons girlfriend. (RIP).

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I am sure what happened with your sons girlfriend is making you more worried, which is understandable...I know it is hard not to think about your FH and if he is ok as well. I think we just have to remember that this is what they are trained for, and they know it is dangerous, and they try not to do anything that would jeopardize themselves or their families. I know it is hard, I hope you work out a way with him for him to tell you when he'll be late etc...

awww!! i feel ya !!

my FH is NYPD and works in one of the worst areas in Queens (113 pct. in SOUTH jamaica...basically where 50 cent used to live) and is now working from 7:30 p.m. to 4 a.m. cause there are so many shootings...and they want more night coverage. (this of course drives my insanity further)

all i can say is thank god for cell phones. my FH knows i worry like crazy, and he checks in with me pretty regularly. when he leaves work he calls to let me know his tour is over and he's heading home. (he doesn't have to do this since we don't live together, but he likes to anyway.) if he's gonna have to stay late for an arrest or other OT, he'll call and let me know. some of the other guys in his pct. bust chops and say 'oh you gotta check in...ooooo' but he doesn't care, he tells them 'that's my girl, and i want her not to worry!'

the feeling will never end....each time i hear the news say 'an officer in queens was injured' or something--my heart stops for a second. the key is to try and not let it overwhelm you!

Sorry to hear about your sons GF!
FH isn't a cop but he works EMS in the city and I know what you mean. While the chances of something happening aren't as high, I still worry. He wants to work for Nassau County PD and the thought scares me.

My FH is NYPDin Brownsville. So is my best friend's husband (they work together) and my FH's 2 brothers. I lean on them a little. When I have a 'freak out' moment, I call my best friend and she calms me down. I know it's not easy. I did speak to FH about it, and he assured me that God forbid if anything happen, there are a few guys who would call me right away.

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Posted by MrsGraziano

My FH is in the 106 in Howard Beach, Queens......when we first got engaged we were already living together and he worked midnights. I hated it so much and I got so nervous that he was an hour late that I called the precinct and ask if his name was still on the rolecall sheet. (the desk officer said that he gets calls like this often, still I was a little embarassed lol). He recentley switched to days and I am so happy....but it is such a horrible thing to worry about. I try to keep it out of my mind as best as I can but it does creep up on me at times.

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awwwwww

howard beach is pretty nice tho-- so that's good at least, the silver lining and i think the midnights ends after a while-- i think once they get some seniority they are able to get different shifts! so that's something to look forward to

ETA: DUHHH did not read carefully enough-- see, he got switched! THATS GREAT

lol.....they use to do the same thing to my man....

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Posted by MJDoc12

awww!! i feel ya !!

my FH is NYPD and works in one of the worst areas in Queens (113 pct. in SOUTH jamaica...basically where 50 cent used to live) and is now working from 7:30 p.m. to 4 a.m. cause there are so many shootings...and they want more night coverage. (this of course drives my insanity further)

all i can say is thank god for cell phones. my FH knows i worry like crazy, and he checks in with me pretty regularly. when he leaves work he calls to let me know his tour is over and he's heading home. (he doesn't have to do this since we don't live together, but he likes to anyway.) if he's gonna have to stay late for an arrest or other OT, he'll call and let me know. some of the other guys in his pct. bust chops and say 'oh you gotta check in...ooooo' but he doesn't care, he tells them 'that's my girl, and i want her not to worry!'

the feeling will never end....each time i hear the news say 'an officer in queens was injured' or something--my heart stops for a second. the key is to try and not let it overwhelm you!

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