Fsil ???? help

WINO1 Posted: Jul 24, 2003 08:51 AM

Fsil ???? help

Girls I normally do not post but need advice, my fsil is 20 y/o college student. We have a good relationship. She was in long term relationship that ended 6 months ago, she is dating people one that she invited to the wedidng she called me to tell me he might not be able to make the wedding and so she was going to bring her college roommate! She is in my wedding and I just feel that at 20 she should come alone if her date is unable to make it not bring a girlfriend, she knows and hangs out wiht some of my friends and will have tons of cousins her age at the wedding. I told her that is how we feel. Am I wrong

bridget&jimmy Posted: Jul 24, 2003 08:56 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I think you should let her bring her friend if it will make her more comfortable. But in the end it is her decision, you invited her with a guest she should be able to bring whoever she wants.

Just my .02 though.

Bridget

OCT1203 Posted: Jul 24, 2003 09:05 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I agree with bridget. I would let her bring her roommate. You did invite her with a guest right? Most people you do invite with a guest and unfortunatly we don't have a say in who they should or shouldn't bring with them. That should be left up to the one you invited. Sorry! JMO

jenny2penny Posted: Jul 24, 2003 09:07 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I have to disagree. I could see if it was a firend, and would not know anyone else, but her family will be there, so I see no need to have her bring a friend.

My sister asked if she could invite a friend (I posted it monday), and I said ab****ely not, she can socialize with the family.

edit: why did a b s o l u t e ly get ***???

jennjohn17 Posted: Jul 24, 2003 09:29 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I have to agree with jenny2penny! Her family will be there. She can socialize with them! I think you did the right thing! Good for you!

cw0904 Posted: Jul 24, 2003 09:32 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I agree with Jenny2penny. My sister is trying to pull the same with me. She will be sitting with cousins and family friends. She can go scratch with the inviting one of her friends bit.

tootsie Posted: Jul 24, 2003 11:10 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I am sorry but I feel a guest is a guest no matter who they are. It's not intererfeing with the number of people (like she is adding on more), she either brings a friend or boyfriend. I don't see it being a big deal. IMO.

pschica Posted: Jul 24, 2003 11:22 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

it might help to have someone there for her - if you can afford it, let her bring a friend - it will probalby be a little hard for her that day if everyone else has 'someone' and she has noone!

kptoys Posted: Jul 24, 2003 11:26 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I would feel more comfortable if my FH couldnt come and I wasnt close to the people at the wedding/party if I could bring a friend of mine. I think you should let her bring a friend.

WINO1 Posted: Jul 24, 2003 11:27 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I am going to tell her that she can,but that she is not invited to the rd

xjulietx Posted: Jul 24, 2003 11:29 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

Let her bring a friend. Maybe she is having a difficult time with her break-up.

CatchI22 Posted: Jul 24, 2003 11:31 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I don't see a problem. I didn't want to bring my ex to my sister's wedding (too much of a commitment thing, I thought) but went with my best friend instead and had a great time! Its someone to dance with and hang out with. sure my family was there but its not the same as having your own *date*

nrvbrd Posted: Jul 24, 2003 11:34 AM

Re: Fsil ???? help

This is a question of being comfortable in your own skin. If it were me- I would go alone, but most people would want to go with someone.

Since you gave her the and guest option you cannot recind it- even if you do not agree with her choice of guest.

Fh;s male friend said to us- if he cannot find a friend to bring he will bring another male friend

tootsie Posted: Jul 24, 2003 12:35 PM

Re: Fsil ???? help

i agree, no rd.

Rob-luvs-me Posted: Jul 24, 2003 01:24 PM

Re: Fsil ???? help

Nvbrd is right it is about whether someone is comfortable with going alone or not - Honestly I have NO problem going alone as long as I know 1 other person at the wedding - but I will be honest and tell you I have gone to weddings with my parents and I am perfectly comforatable going that way - but you have a MUCH better time with a friend or a date - to dance with etc. So maybe she wants to bring her friend NOT for comfort reasons but maybe she thinks she will have a better time that way. JMO

Red30NY Posted: Jul 24, 2003 01:38 PM

Re: Fsil ???? help

I'm having a similar issue with one of my BM's. She just broke up with a boyfriend and wants to bring another girlfriend that I haven't met before as her guest. At first I felt a little weird about it. I've invited the BM's family, too, so it's not like she wouldn't have anyone to socialize with, but I did say and guest, and not specifically a guest of the opposite sex. I joked with her that everyone will think she's a lesbian if she brings a female guest, but now we're both okay with it, so that's the end of it. Have you discussed this with your FH? What does he think?

michele31 Posted: Jul 24, 2003 01:47 PM

Re: Fsil ???? help

Weddings are not free. You are paying per person. I can see inviting her with a long-time boyfriend but I am sorry she should not be allowed to bring her roommate or even a guy she met a month before. This is a wedding, a formal event, not a backyard BBQ. She has a lot of family at the event so she will not be alone. I would make sure I sat her with cousins her own age though, so she has people to talk to and dance with.
Was she mad? Did she say something back to you?