Funny Bush Quotes from my New Favorite Website

Disclaimer to all Republicans/Conservatives/People with no sense of humor- yes- ALL people make mistakes- take these for what it's worth- FUNNY!

Real Quotes From A Real Moron

'Arbolist...Look up the word. I don't know, maybe I made it up. Anyway, it's an arbo-tree-ist, someone who knows about trees.'
Crawford, TX 8/21/01

'It's your money, you paid for it.'
La Crosse, WI 10/18/00

'The Bob Jones policy on interracial dating, I mean I spoke out on interracial dating. I spoke out against that. I spoke out against interracial dating. I support the policy of interracial dating.'
CBS News 2/25/00

'I don't read what's handed to me.'
New York, NY 3/15/00

'More and more of our imports come from overseas.'
Beaverton, OR 9/29/00

'I understand small business growth. I was one.'
New York, NY 2/19/00

'Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods.'
Austin, Texas 12/20/00

'If affirmative action means what I just described, what I'm for, then I'm for it.'
St. Louis, MO 10/18/00

'This is Preservation Month. I appreciate preservation...You gotta preserve.'
Nashua, NH 1/28/00

'Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?'
Florence, SC 1/11/00

'They Misunderestimated me.'
Bentonville, AR 11/6/00

'I think if you know what you believe, it makes it a lot easier to answer questions. I can't answer your question.'
Reynoldsburg, OH 10/4/00

'Our priorities is our faith.'
Greensboro, NC 10/10/00

'If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator.'
Washington, DC 12/18/00

'There's nothing more deep than recognizing Israel's right to exist. That's the most deep thought of all...I can't think of anything more deep than that.'
Washington, DC, 3/13/02

'And so, in my State of the my State of the Union or state-my speech to the nation, whatever you want to call it, speech to the nation-I asked Americans to give 4,000 years-4,000 hours over the next-the rest of your life-of service to America. That's what I asked for-4,000 hours.'
Bridgeport, CT, 4/9/02

'This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating.'
New York, NY 4/23/02

'For a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring alliances of modern times (Dude, it's been like 60 years).'
Tokyo 2/18/02

'I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believeÑI believe what I believe is right.'
Rome 7/22/01

'I think we agree, the past is over.'
Dallas, TX 5/10/00

Holy moly, what a shame...

Its funny, but sad all at the same time.

I found a few of his most r(The 15 most recent Dubya declarations) Not quite as funny, but just as scary!!

It reads like a mystery, a novel. It's well written.
-- Dubya's assessment of the 9/11 Commission's report, and a statement I'm sure will make the country feel a whole lot better, Crawford, Texas, Jul. 26, 2004

Mayor George Van Dusen of Skokie, thanks for coming, George. Great first name. Fill the potholes.
-- The latest in a long series of mayoral pothole comments, Glenview, Illinois. Jul. 22, 2004

By the way, to whom much has been given, much is owed. Not only are we leading the world in terms of encouraging freedom and peace, we're feeding the hungry. We're taking care of, as best as we possibly can, the victims of HIV/AIDS.
-- Dubya tries to quote scripture here (Luke 12:48 - 'To whom much is given, much is required.'), only his version means the exact opposite, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, Jul. 20, 2004

In the campaign, you'll hear, we're going only to tax the rich. That's what you'll hear. Now, this is from a fellow who has promised about $2 trillion of new spending thus far. And only taxing the rich, first of all, creates a huge tax gap, which means buyer beware. You see, if you can't raise enough by taxing the rich, guess who gets to pay next? Yes, the not rich. That's all of us.
-- Dubya actually tries again to convince an audience that he's from the middle class, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, Jul. 20, 2004

That's one of the goals we're on, is to encourage programs, community-based -- you don't have to be a faith-based program, although it turns out faith-based programs are pretty good places to find people who want to love a neighbor just like they'd like to be loved themselves.
-- I wish I had a count of the number of times Dubya has shoehorned the phrase 'love a neighbor' into his public appearances. 'One of the goals we're on' is a first, though. Cedar Rapids, Iowa, Jul. 20, 2004

I want to be the peace president.
I dare say he might be going about it the wrong way, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, Jul. 20, 2004

We are building a culture of responsibility in America. We're changing the culture of America from one that has said, if it feels good do it, and if you've got a problem, blame somebody else -- to a culture in which each of us understands we are responsible for the decisions we make in life. If you are fortunate enough to be a mother or a father, you're responsible for loving your child with all your heart and all your soul.
-- Another repeat offense creeps into Dubya's campaign rhetoric, St. Charles, Missouri, Jul. 20, 2004

I appreciate the good folks from Minnesota and Iron Ridge and Northern Wisconsin who are with us today. Thanks for coming. And by the look of things, I'm in Bush-Cheney country.
-- Or in imaginary country... what he meant to say was the Iron Range, Duluth, Minnesota, Jul. 14, 2004

You cannot be pro-small business and pro-trial lawyer at the same time.
-- Dubya takes gross oversimplification to a new level, Waukesha, Wisconsin, Jul. 14, 2004

I don't think you order suiciders to kill innocent men, women, and children if you're a religious person.
-- No, I don't reckon you do, even if there were such things as suiciders, Fond Du Lac, Wisconsin, Jul. 14, 2004

When you hear on your TV screens, America is marching to war, it's difficult to make investment.
-- Dubya adds a sloppy yet humorous twist to this repeat offense, Fond Du Lac, Wisconsin, Jul. 14, 2004

I went to the United Nations and said, he's [Saddam Hussein is] a threat. And they agreed with the fact that he was a threat, by a 15 to nothing vote in the United Nations Security Council. See, the world spoke. Not only America speak, the world spoke.
-- Conjugation issues in Kutztown, Pennsylvania, Jul. 9, 2004

Pennsylvania's unemployment rate is 5.1 percent. That's good news for people who are trying to find jobs.
-- It's not exactly good news until those people have found jobs, Dubya. Smoketown, Pennsylvania, Jul. 9, 2004

People were nervous during the recession. Then we got attacked, and I'm going to talk a little bit about making America safer. But we got attacked on September 11th. It hurt our economy. In other words, you're in a recession, then we have an attack.
-- Well, that makes sense (especially the shift from 'we' to 'you' and back to 'we'), Smoketown, Pennsylvania, Jul. 9, 2004

During a period of war, it's hard for the economy to grow because people don't feel confident. The concept of war is negative, not positive. I don't know if you remember, but we used to have on our TV screens, 'March to War,' and if you're a small business owner or a big business owner, when you're thinking you're marching to war, there's a sense of uncertainty with that.
-- Dubya resurrects an old favorite here, Smoketown, Pennsylvania, Jul. 9, 2004

ecent ones.

These are classics!

sassyz75 and heidla, where are you guys finding these? I have to send them to my FI- he'll LOVE them!!!

I found mine on this site.

here

Sassy's are from here.

punk rock

I have a calendar of 'Bushisms'...yes, 365 of them

Thanks for the laugh- I really needed it

My favorite, 'that's one of the goals we're on'